I'm terrified. Be easy on me.

I'm literally shaking as I write this. I've written and erased it probably 20 times.
I came here to these forums years ago as an SO (my wife transitioned years before I married her). I hinted around at being non-binary once here, but then left the forums for a couple years or so - I was scared I think. The ironic thing is that my SO told me that before she met me, she didn't think she could love a guy. I've hinted at being non-binary to her, but still haven't opened up fully to her yet and said, "You still haven't loved a guy!" but will make myself do so soon (likely this week).
I'm not sure if I want to be ambiguous or if what I actually want is to present as a woman, although some of that might be the doubts I have about being able to look feminine. Regardless, what I *do* know is that I hate looking like a guy. I hate that person I see in the mirror. I have to do something. And that something right now is to start some steps towards at least not being completely unquestionably masculine looking.
I've grown a lot as a person and finally decided I need to like the face I see in the mirror. I'm not brave enough to post my actual picture but I have a masculine appearance and am middle aged. I'm cursed with thick, dark facial hair that I can shave but the stubble is always visible on my fairly light skin (I do tan). I don't like looking masculine. But I've also got very little style-sense (I typically have dressed as a stereotypical straight guy).
Yesterday, I cleaned up my eyebrows just the tiniest amount, getting rid of 5 or 6 hairs above my nose. I also shaved the part of my hairy chest that's visible while wearing an open collar shirt. Nobody else would notice I did these things, but it was amazing how liberating they were. I've never cared about my appearance because I never thought I could look like who I am. I couldn't walk out the door today without taking some extra care - that pretty much sealed the deal for me, I need to find ways to express myself, even as I am terrified of the path I'm on. The other option is hating myself. I liked how I was standing a little taller these last couple days - for something so incredibly insignificant. I have to wonder what it would feel like to make a change that is actually noticeable, but right now I'd settle for small minor changes.
What are some small things I can do to at least look slightly less ultra-masculine without jumping into the pool head-first?