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How do you cope with depression?

Started by Charlie Nicki, September 23, 2017, 11:32:49 PM

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Charlie Nicki

Today is one those days for me... Most things are fine and I'm temporarily in Sydney, Australia, which is a beautiful city and a lot of people would love the opportunity to come here. Yet here I am feeling terrible, sad and lonely. Do you guys have any strategies or tips to minimize depression?


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Latina :) I speak Spanish, English and a bit of Portuguese.
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TinaVane

 For me I attempt to ignore it and listen to music


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C'est Si Bon
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Deborah

Before HRT I coped with heavy exercise.  That usually kept me too preoccupied and tired for depression to take hold.  So perhaps you can find something you like that fully engages your mind and fills all the extra time.

When I was unable to continue exercising because I developed chronic exhaustion I coped with depression poorly mainly by drinking a lot every night.  That was not a good solution.


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Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being....  - Dan Barker

U.S. Army Retired
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Charlie Nicki

Quote from: Deborah on September 23, 2017, 11:37:46 PM
Before HRT I coped with heavy exercise.  That usually kept me too preoccupied and tired for depression to take hold.  So perhaps you can find something you like that fully engages your mind and fills all the extra time.

When I was unable to continue exercising because I developed chronic exhaustion I coped with depression poorly mainly by drinking a lot every night.  That was not a good solution.


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Yeah drinking seems counterproductive. I get even more depressed after being drunk... I'm even afraid to drink one beer now.


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Latina :) I speak Spanish, English and a bit of Portuguese.
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Drexy/Drex

Weight training I used to put all my negative energy  and anger into that, but since taking hormones  I feel much better and I am also on slow dose of ssri,s , but before those I would  remind myself that it doesn't  last forever.. and one day I observed  how lucky  I was in relationship  to 3 tragic things I saw in one day,
I found it helps to get out and about... if you are in Sydney  there must be loads of interesting  things to do see
maybe go for a tour climbing over the top of the Harbour bridge....
I do understand  how sometimes  one cannot  see the forest for the trees... I've been there... but it does help to get out and look around  😊
Everything
  Louder
   Than
Everything
    Else
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Laurie

 You can try my tried and true method. Box it up and bury it in a distance dark corner. YMMV
April 13, 2019 switched to estradiol valerate
December 20, 2018    Referral sent to OHSU Dr Dugi  for vaginoplasty consult
December 10, 2018    Second Letter VA Psychiatric Practical nurse
November 15, 2018    First letter from VA therapist
May 11, 2018 I am Laurie Jeanette Wickwire
May   3, 2018 Submitted name change forms
Aug 26, 2017 another increase in estradiol
Jun  26, 2017 Last day in male attire That's full time I guess
May 20, 2017 doubled estradiol
May 18, 2017 started electrolysis
Dec   4, 2016 Started estradiol and spironolactone



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SonadoraXVX

Along the lines of what Laurie said, but more practical. What I do now is:

1. Write on a sheet of paper what I'm depressed about, then I just rip it up real good and flush it down the toilet, or you can burn it, but the point being, just rip/burn the paper, until its unrecognizable to you or anybody else.

Before hrt, I used to weight train and exercise heavily(i.e.cardio/weight bearing exercise).

Nowadays, I just go out with my girlfriend and people wonder how I handle my depression so well. I mainly don't tell them anymore, since they think I'm BSing them.

You'd be surprised that it works.
To know thyself is to be blessed, but to know others is to prevent supreme headaches
Sun Tzu said it best, "To know thyself is half the battle won, but to know yourself and the enemy, is to win 100% of the battles".



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Charlie Nicki

Quote from: SonadoraXVX on September 24, 2017, 12:50:14 AM
Along the lines of what Laurie said, but more practical. What I do now is:

1. Write on a sheet of paper what I'm depressed about, then I just rip it up real good and flush it down the toilet, or you can burn it, but the point being, just rip/burn the paper, until its unrecognizable to you or anybody else.

Before hrt, I used to weight train and exercise heavily(i.e.cardio/weight bearing exercise).

Nowadays, I just go out with my girlfriend and people wonder how I handle my depression so well. I mainly don't tell them anymore, since they think I'm BSing them.

You'd be surprised that it works.

Good tips Sonadora (where are you from by the way? That's a word in Spanish). I've tried both routes of talking to people and venting and also not saying anything and trying to ignore. It seems like a balance of both works the best... When I talk too much about it, it's almost like I cannot forget it and it makes me feel worse but then if I don't say anything at all for too long it's like it's bottled up inside and also feels bad. Then I talk to someone about it and feel a little relieved. I'll try what you said about the piece of paper.


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Latina :) I speak Spanish, English and a bit of Portuguese.
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Laurie

 LMAO   Don't bother with my method it doesn't work.

   What it does, is make you irritable, angry, sullen and those are the high points. I've got bottled up issues going back probably 50 years and probably more. Every so often something comes up that makes it fresh, and again it becomes a devil to put away. Every time you try to shove it into that box, it gets harder and harder and the box gets fuller and fuller. I think my box has ripped the seams open as I can't seem to get things to stay in it anymore. So I try to fake it, but I'm not an actor so that's not working either.
Laurie
April 13, 2019 switched to estradiol valerate
December 20, 2018    Referral sent to OHSU Dr Dugi  for vaginoplasty consult
December 10, 2018    Second Letter VA Psychiatric Practical nurse
November 15, 2018    First letter from VA therapist
May 11, 2018 I am Laurie Jeanette Wickwire
May   3, 2018 Submitted name change forms
Aug 26, 2017 another increase in estradiol
Jun  26, 2017 Last day in male attire That's full time I guess
May 20, 2017 doubled estradiol
May 18, 2017 started electrolysis
Dec   4, 2016 Started estradiol and spironolactone



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MeTony

When I'm depressed I go for a walk. A long walk, atleast 1 hour. I prefer a walk in the forest. It gives me peace in mind.

If I cannot go for a walk I listen to music. Or go to sleep. When I wake up I usually feel better.

My depressions usually don't last long anymore.

I did have a serious depression 10 years ago that turned into psychosis. I was ill for 5 years. Meds AND walks/exercise made me come back to life.
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Charlie Nicki

Quote from: Laurie on September 24, 2017, 01:09:49 AM
LMAO   Don't bother with my method it doesn't work.

   What it does, is make you irritable, angry, sullen and those are the high points. I've got bottled up issues going back probably 50 years and probably more. Every so often something comes up that makes it fresh, and again it becomes a devil to put away. Every time you try to shove it into that box, it gets harder and harder and the box gets fuller and fuller. I think my box has ripped the seams open as I can't seem to get things to stay in it anymore. So I try to fake it, but I'm not an actor so that's not working either.
Laurie

Aww Laurie I'm sorry to hear that, yes I believe repressing things is never effective.
Latina :) I speak Spanish, English and a bit of Portuguese.
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Laurie

Quote from: Charlie Nicki on September 24, 2017, 02:22:18 AM
Aww Laurie I'm sorry to hear that, yes I believe repressing things is never effective.

  Some people tell me admitting to being depressed is a good thing, Nicki.  I've decided to talk to my therapist on Thursday about it. Though I don't know just what I'm going to say or how to say it. Atm Thursday seems a long ways from today but it will get here soon enough I guess.

   I know  ice cream !!

April 13, 2019 switched to estradiol valerate
December 20, 2018    Referral sent to OHSU Dr Dugi  for vaginoplasty consult
December 10, 2018    Second Letter VA Psychiatric Practical nurse
November 15, 2018    First letter from VA therapist
May 11, 2018 I am Laurie Jeanette Wickwire
May   3, 2018 Submitted name change forms
Aug 26, 2017 another increase in estradiol
Jun  26, 2017 Last day in male attire That's full time I guess
May 20, 2017 doubled estradiol
May 18, 2017 started electrolysis
Dec   4, 2016 Started estradiol and spironolactone



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Bari Jo

I have a dog that is my therapy.  When I get depressed I take him for a walk, or play with him.  Seeing his enjoyment usually brings me out of my funk.  If I don't feel like doing either of those and just sleep or lay in front of tv depressed, he picks up on it.  It won't be long till he's in my lap, just giving me love.  Animals are the best therapy, imo.

Bari Jo
you know how far the universe extends outward? i think i go inside just as deep.

10/11/18 - out to the whole world.  100% friends and family support.
11/6/17 - came out to sister, best day of my life
9/5/17 - formal diagnosis and stopping DIY in favor if prescribed HRT
6/18/17 - decided to stop fighting the trans beast, back on DIY.
Too many ups and downs, DIY, purges of self inbetween dates.
Age 10 - suppression and denial began
Age 8 - knew I was different
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JoanneB

I relied heavily upon in the past drinking too much as well as eating too much to try to shut off the noise of both the depression and GD. Or are they a set?

The best technique I have these days, like MeTonie said, is long walks, usually in as natural of a setting as possible. In other words not the hustle and bustle of city sidewalks. Back country roads when I lived in a rural area. A city park, railroad tracks or mostly dead industrial areas. In either case there is plenty of "Wonderment" around to get my mind thinking on other things, as well as seems to quietly process in the background what is really eating at me and what my options are to get over this big hump.
.          (Pile Driver)  
                    |
                    |
                    ^
(ROCK) ---> ME <--- (HARD PLACE)
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MaxForever

Depression= me lately too. I dunno since I discovered being transgender I was happy for a while and then
I got depressed. I started  eating sweets to help myself feel better I do not suggest that as a way to cover depression.
I should not be doing that it's the first time in my life I have used food to help with depression. :(
I use meditation music sometimes I should start using it again. Sometimes I am messed up and want to be depressed I am not sure if that makes sense.
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KathyLauren

Pre-transition, I dealt with it by being outdoors as much as possible, walking, running, cycling or hiking.  These days, HRT and RLE seem to have taken care of it.
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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Julia1996

I don't get depressed nearly as much since I transitioned but it still happens sometimes. To cheer myself up I just play a practical joke on my brother.  That's always good for a laugh or two.
Julia


Born 1998
Started hrt 2015
SRS done 5/21/2018
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Roll

Lately I go full-on OCD mode on school work, not just for outright depression but also just to make it through the day without too many excessive thoughts about my situation that may spiral into depression. (Since it is pretty much all I think about at this point and is why I am on these forums every second I can be.)

I actually wind up getting a lot done because of it sometimes oddly. Used to lose myself in video games in the same way, but that was a lot less productive. Now I wind up way ahead in all of my courses. (The problem really kicks in when I run out of stuff to do.)
~ Ellie
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(I made the s lowercase so it didn't look as much like PMS... ;D)

An Open Letter to anyone suffering from anxiety, particularly those afraid to make your first post or continue posting!

8/30/17 - First Therapy! The road begins in earnest.
10/20/17 - First coming out (to my father)!
12/16/17 - BEGAN HRT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
5/21/18 - FIRST DAY OUT AS ME!!!!!!!!!
6/08/18 - 2,250 Hair Grafts
6/23/18 - FIRST PRIDE!
8/06/18 - 100%, completely out!
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2/27/19 - Name Change!

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Christine1

Put some ear phones in and go for a run or ride ur bike etc...  Just get outside Girl!


Therapy 1-4-2017
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Kara_Rae

I sometimes walk in the park or do some cardio to wear myself down. A good cry also helps, prevents me from trying to bottle it up. I also find other distractions such as playing video games, reading a book, or throwing on a good movie (usually a comedy).
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