Hello,

I'm new here, and this is my first post.  I've felt like a girl and crossdressed (in secret) since age 11. I'm now 35, and ready to finally come out. I'm really concerned, because I currently look like Andre the giant.🤦‍♀️ I have an absolutely massive skeletal structure.  When trying to enter measurements in to a body frame size website, the choices for wrist/ ankle measurements do not go big enough even for large men!  I'm afraid I'll never look like the real me.  My chest already measures 58".  That's without breasts! I feel like shrek outside, but inside, I feel like a big, beautiful, Amazonian ginger! Please post if you used to be huge pre-transition.

Thank you,
Katherine


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Welcome to Susan's Place. While I am tall at 6'2" I was fortunate to always look like the 98 pound weakling even though I weighed a bit more. In your case, diet if needed and a Testosterone blocker may help you lose some of the muscle mass.  While you may not develop a slender figure, you might appear more feminine. HRT is magic in many people so don't count yourself out yet.

When you look at the before and after threads, often the transition looks like two different people so for now, enjoy the ride and wait to see what the future has in store for you.

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Hi Kate. Welcome to the site. I'm Julia.

Hi Kate!
At my heaviest I weighed about 300 lbs with a 52" chest. I'm currently at about 190 and a 40" chest. Weight loss and long duration low intensity cardio exercise can have a massive impact on body shape.
I'm almost 5'11", will always have a broad chest and shoulders. I'll never be a slim girl,  but I could have an athletic physique.
HRT can also help cut muscle bulk over time.
Dressing to your shape also helps,  v-necks draw the eye away from large shoulders,  I avoid round necked clothing like the plague!

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Thanks Megan!

I'm having as crappy of a day today as I had a great one coming out!  🤦‍♀️ Life goes on.  I'm getting a gastric sleeve in January, thus beginning a several year period of the hospital being a hangout spot.🤣

I'm just feeling really ugly, fat, manly, and gross today.  What are you going to do? I know this is the beginning of a long journey.  Tea and cats help.[emoji5]

I've felt like a girl as long as I can remember.  There's a picture of me when I was 3, dressed up in clothes from an old trunk-all women's clothes, cobalt teal high heels and everything.

I started seriously dressing up in private when I was 11. I would take my mom's bras and panties, makeup, swimsuits, and lock myself in the bathroom. I would tape my boyhood back so things looked fairly girly down there, and dress up when I was home alone with my little brother.

I told him all this yesterday, and he had no idea! 🤣 I guess I hid it pretty well.

Anyway, ask questions
Kate

Welcome Kate!

Kate, you say your brother was surprised,  but I hope he was supportive or at least not negative? Coming out to people is usually very beneficial mentally for us,  but can transfer some strain to others while they process it.
Good luck for the gastric sleave next year. If you find you need it down the road, I've posted (on a separate thread) my experience with having an extended abdominoplasty (tummy tuck) after my weight loss,  please PM me if you want more info on that. Megan. X

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Hi Kate, welcome :-) I'm Noomi <3

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Thanks to all for the greetings and support! [emoji5]

Megan,

Yes, my brother is very supportive.  He is gay, and very much an activist for lgbt 🏳️‍[emoji304] issues.  He's really my main support right now.

I've tried finding a transgender support group in my area; the only one I could find apparently doesn't have enough people interested for the woman running it to start it yet, unfortunately.[emoji26]. It sucks living in a small town sometimes.  Next nearest group is over 2 hours away.

I took a halfway decent selfie 🤳, and tried using a beauty app to make myself pass, at least as much as possible.



Thanks to everyone for all your support [emoji4]


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Quote from: KatherineVictoria on October 06, 2017, 03:27:03 PM
Thanks to all for the greetings and support! [emoji5]

Megan,

Yes, my brother is very supportive.  He is gay, and very much an activist for lgbt [emoji1021]️‍[emoji304] issues.  He's really my main support right now.

I've tried finding a transgender support group in my area; the only one I could find apparently doesn't have enough people interested for the woman running it to start it yet, unfortunately.[emoji26]. It sucks living in a small town sometimes.  Next nearest group is over 2 hours away.

I took a halfway decent selfie 🤳, and tried using a beauty app to make myself pass, at least as much as possible.



Thanks to everyone for all your support [emoji4]


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Great news about your brother,  having support and allies (particularly family) is very useful!
The picture shows some potential, your skin tone looks great.
Shame there's not much local trans* support,  but broader/local LGBT groups will probably be very supportive and accepting if there are any; and there's always us lot [emoji6]. X

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Hi Kate. I don't think green eye shadow is good for you. But welcome, sister


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Quote from: elkie-t on October 06, 2017, 08:34:03 PM
Hi Kate. I don't think green eye shadow is good for you. But welcome, sister


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I'll admit, I've never had any training in makeup; I just assumed since I have green eyes, the green eyeshadow might look nice.  (Especially with red hair)  Live and learn.  Any tips would be greatly appreciated.

I'm seeking out a one on one with a gender therapist in my area soon.  I'll post again when I know more.

Kate


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Youtube is great for makeup tutorials if you've not already checked that out. And if and when you're ready,  getting advice in person from a makeup store or counter is super useful (you can present male if needed and have them remove it after). I had a session a at Mac store last year and learned loads. X

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Hi Kate!  I'm FTM and have the opposite problem of looking too feminine to pass, but like you, I've sought help from the gastric sleeve.  I had the operation at the end of July and am down 28 pounds since surgery, or 68 pounds from my high weight.  I feel tons better already!  Congratulations on taking this step toward better health!