The one I suspect is my sister. She doesn't have any problems being a female but her normal dress is jeans and a work shirt. She never wears any makeup and in the last 40 years, the only time she wore a dress was at her wedding then she couldn't wait to get out of it. She has been fully aware of my transition so if she was uncomfortable, there would be no problem finding somebody to discuss it with but she hasn't said a thing.

I used to wonder about my father's second wife.  She was a very masculine woman and only ever wore jeans and work shirts.  Which, in turn, made me wonder about my father.

 I thought my best friend in high school might be like me. He had the most beautiful handwriting and was very sensitive. I used to imagine we were going together but I never told him, even though one night when we were out together he said to me " if you were a girl this is the part where I would try to kiss you"  I wish I had spoke up then. 
After high school we were still close for a couple of years. Then he got married and his wife did not like me, I can only speculate as to why. So we sort of lost touch over the years I know where he lives but I am hesitant to contact him, I don't know if he knows about me. 
I had a dream about him early in my transition. I was at a wedding where they were the bride and she was beautiful, but some of the guests were being very rude to her and calling her names. I went over to tell them to stop and they started calling me names as well and I realized I was dressed as a bridesmaid. Not sure what any of that really means but it has stuck with me for years.

Never crosses my mind tbh.

I worried for years about my cousin 'D' for the longest time more that they might harm themselves being severely depressed, but that's as far as it went. After coming out to my family this summer, I learned another cousin of mine is also 'gender non conforming.' Again it never crossed my mind before and still doesn't. It's cool not being the only one, though.

It may be possible that some people you know are trans and closeted
I'm friends with a man who is outwardly just a little camp, who later admitted he would greatly prefer being female but didn't want to transition because our technologies wouldn't make the transition clean enough for him.
I think the tech holds a lot of people back, honestly.

Yes I do... quite a bit actually. It could be a stranger at a doctors office or a hotel while traveling or someone I know closer.

Recently I have been told one of my nephews is getting in trouble in Kindergarden for liking dresses and his pink bike. I need to pick this up with my brother to see if he was actually reaching out for help. I know they would be totally accepting but they may just have a ton of questions...

One of my neighbors / friends kid too. We have been suspecting for a while and his parents posted a picture of him in his sisters ballet dress. We have never seen him so happy. Keeps me wondering and I would not be surprised at all.

There are a few more...

For both I can only be there in case they have questions or need advice.

So yes. I do wonder. Would I ever say anything? Not at all.

Quote from: Megan. on October 22, 2017, 05:09:05 AM
I know and have met plenty of Trans* people in real life, plus you bunch of reprobates [emoji16]. My openness about my transition at work has lead to one contact who I've been able to give some support to which is very rewarding.
I'm sure 99% of the time I'm just projecting,  but I also know that until I came out, no one would have ever guessed I was trans* (hid it very well). I guess based on that,  I imagine anyone could be,  but I'd absolutely never ask.

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Well if you hadn't worn that Manchester United hoodie all the time.

On the other hand I came across someone from high school on LinkedIn that looked familiar, but had a female name now. I was like, didn't that used to be Tony? I had no idea when I was in high school, but then I was in a closet with in a closet with in a closet then.  She was surprised too. Now I'm a little more in tune.


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Quote from: undautri on October 22, 2017, 04:02:07 PM
It may be possible that some people you know are trans and closeted
I'm friends with a man who is outwardly just a little camp, who later admitted he would greatly prefer being female but didn't want to transition because our technologies wouldn't make the transition clean enough for him.
I think the tech holds a lot of people back, honestly.

I think this is how I looked up until a few months ago.

Quote from: Gertrude on October 23, 2017, 08:23:11 AM
On the other hand I came across someone from high school on LinkedIn that looked familiar, but had a female name now. I was like, didn't that used to be Tony? I had no idea when I was in high school, but then I was in a closet with in a closet with in a closet then.  She was surprised too. Now I'm a little more in tune.

Thats my issue is I have wonders and inklings of people, but I cant possibly figure it out. i just figured me out, lol. I want there to be so I can have someone who gets me to hang out with!

Quote from: Megan. on October 22, 2017, 03:12:13 AM
Am I the only one who wonders if other cis family or friends are also trans* when I see similar behaviours in them,  or am I just projecting?

You are projecting.  The Williams Institute survey from 2016 found that only 0.6% of the US population identifies as transgender.  That's a tiny fraction of the overall population.  Statistically it's extremely unlikely that your friends and family also just happen to be trans.  Almost impossible actually.

As an example, out of 200 people, only 1 is transgender.  You are that one.  Out of 400 people, you'll be one of only two transgender people.  Are there 400 people in your life?  If so, then I guess one of them might be trans. 

Quote from: echo7 on October 23, 2017, 01:30:17 PM
As an example, out of 200 people, only 1 is transgender.  You are that one.  Out of 400 people, you'll be one of only two transgender people.  Are there 400 people in your life?  If so, then I guess one of them might be trans. 

That assumes that you choose the people in your life randomly.  The average person's chances of being eaten by a man-eating shark are pretty slim, but are significantly increased by habitually swimming with them and trying to act like an injured seal.

If we gravitate towards people who might be like ourselves, I'm sure that we increase the probability that we meet people who are like ourselves.

Quote from: echo7 on October 23, 2017, 01:30:17 PM
You are projecting.  The Williams Institute survey from 2016 found that only 0.6% of the US population identifies as transgender.  That's a tiny fraction of the overall population.  Statistically it's extremely unlikely that your friends and family also just happen to be trans.  Almost impossible actually.

As an example, out of 200 people, only 1 is transgender.  You are that one.  Out of 400 people, you'll be one of only two transgender people.  Are there 400 people in your life?  If so, then I guess one of them might be trans. 

I think it's a lot higher. More like 1.5%.


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Quote from: echo7 on October 23, 2017, 01:30:17 PM
You are projecting.  The Williams Institute survey from 2016 found that only 0.6% of the US population identifies as transgender.  That's a tiny fraction of the overall population.  Statistically it's extremely unlikely that your friends and family also just happen to be trans.  Almost impossible actually.

I ran the numbers and figured that there would be only one or two families in the US who had multiple transgender members. The posting on the site disproved that as it happened far more often than what I calculated. At least once cause of ->-bleeped-<- is genetic so having multiple LGBT members in a family is far more likely than one would expect. For that matter, if there is one, it's likely there will be another.

Having read the article, I'm left with the thought that the numbers are probably higher - I'd like to see the numbers for the UK, Australia or Canada.

In my generation of my family, there are 7 of us.. Me, the trans lesbian.. I also have a male and female cousin who are both gay, there's another one we aren't sure of, she hasn't made any statements. This is apparently a statistical anomaly - either that or the numbers the stats are based on are wrong.

As Disraeli allegedly put it,
"There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics".

Some years ago, a British woman was convicted on the basis of expert evidence that there was almost no chance of having 2 cot deaths in the same family.  It was obvious to almost everyone but the judge and jury that it was a miscarriage of justice, as although cot deaths are quite rare, a physiological cause may run in the same family, increasing the chance of multiple deaths.  (By British law, the fact that a court got the facts wrong is not enough reason to overturn a verdict, as the court is "the sole judge of the facts".  She was eventually released when lawyers found an unrelated technicality.  The expert witness was struck off by the BMA but later reinstated when a judge ruled that expert witnesses should not be afraid of giving evidence.)

AS Dena said, a genetic or physiological cause could also increase the likelihood of having multiple trans children in the same family.  You can't take a mean from the the general population and assume that it applies to any small sample that you choose.

Quote from: MaryT on October 23, 2017, 05:30:07 PM
As Disraeli allegedly put it,
"There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics".

Even without genetic predispositioning, it is an error to presume that because there is already one trans child in a family, there is almost no chance of having a second.  It is an example of the "gambler's fallacy".  The chance of throwing Heads twice in a row may be 1 in 4, but if Heads has already been thrown, the chance of a 2nd one is 1 in 2.  If a trans person ALREADY EXISTS in a family, the chance of having another trans child is the same as if there were no trans people in the family.

Two of my four children are Trans one is FTM and the other is non binary.  The one that is FTM came out over 10 years before I did, I wanted to tell them then but I was still fighting myself.
So I guess we must be unicorns or something.

In the generation where DES was commonly prescribed to mothers during pregnancy, if one sibling was exposed, there's a good chance that others were too.  Environmental factors can run in families just like genetic factors do.

Of three siblings in our family, one is gay and one is trans.  DES exposure is highly probable for all three of us.

I don't think anyone in my family or friends is trans. It's very likely that a couple of my friends started analyzing themselves a bit after I came out to them, but their conclusion was a NO.

    I came out as trans to my wife about 3 months before I found out that my oldest grandchild was a transman so there is no chance there is any social pressure there and my family is much less than 400 so statistics dont hold up I do believe there is a genetic factor

   bobbisue