Clara, I have to reiterate because I really feel you're not getting the point.
But first let me say I absolutely support your desire and choice to self identity, to choose your own preferred language etc, I think we all need that. But recognize that when you choose to use redefine language that differs from what other trans people or the medical community use and agree on you're going to get push back.
And then again, anytime someone uses the "I hurt more than you do" argument, I'm sorry, you lose me.
Ok, my framework laid out, let me try to express myself clearly.
Again, a big part of your argument here is simply already almost completely agreed within medicine. Transsexualism is recognized universally as having somatic (prenatal hormonal balance) origin and as I said before, that science goes back 40+ years. I would add -- and this cuts to bubbles' points-- this isn't new and has almost certainly evolved into natural variation in pregnancy/embryology. Transexuality probably has conferred some very real evolutionary$ benefits and so it's a common variation. (I'm not going to go into somatic / RNA genetics but that probably plays a part also).
It's more within the trans community that transgender and transexual as terms are conflated. A lot of younger people who I would absolutely identity as transexual eschew that term, preferring transgender. I see that and respect it, to me transexual is a proper subset of transgender.
I also find I have to support the idea that both some people validly transition irrespective of anything that happened in utero and also that as objective tests aren't available, many of us go into transition with a degree of uncertainty as to our specific etiology or perhaps simply don't care about those distinctions.
However in all of these cases, I find getting hung up on semantics to be a waste of time and energy. Language exists to describe reality, not fully define it and so it's necessarily imprecise.
Since few of the presenting modalities of dsd/intersexuality are treatable with hrt and because none of them (that I know of at least) have anything to do with the brain, they're correctly imo distinct from transexuality. That's not inconsistent with thinking that both are somatic. The fact is that for now at least transexuality is principally diagnosed by people practicing psychology and you can't very well tell me that's wrong because in the current context it's what works.
To be clear, I wasn't personally offended, I'm transexual and honestly I don't care so much what the terminology is
What I care about is that treatment today is available, vastly improved over what it was a decade ago and no longer a beauty contest in that those of us who can't practically or for whatever reason choose not to pass are now eligible -- albeit with a bit more hoop jumping. (And yes, I've heard post op women right here on Susan's complaining about non passable women in the same recovery areas they were in so I'm under no illusions that trans people are necessarily accepting of other trans people).