I have always had a shy bladder, long before I realized that I was transgender. I will soon be medically starting to transition from mtf. I am wondering if anyone else on here has had a shy bladder issue prior to their transitioning and if transitioning helped or cured it. Before I had realizes that I was trans, I could never figure out why I could never urinate normally in public, especially in mens bathrooms and now that I know I am hoping that transitioning will help my problem, I assume it will. So have any of you had this problem before transitioning and did it get cured by transitioning? Thanks!!

Hi Mallory 🙋‍♀️ Welcome to Susan's Place!  I'm Jessica, a trans woman.  I didn't have a shy bladder I had one that was overactive.  Hrt has brought things back to a far less active insistence.  Now I just have to pee all the time because of spiro!
I see your new here, so I'll post some links that may help you get better acquainted with the site.

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Mentally, who knows... But it definitely makes the prostate smaller, which improves flow quite a bit!

I'm not that far in, I've only been on HRT for a little over a month, so I can't really say if it's gotten better, I'm hoping it will. I have never been able too use a urinal, and it's always been easier for me to go if I sit down, if I know no one is around I have no issue, but if I think someone can hear me, their is no chance it will happen. It's been such a stressful part of my life and I'm praying it will get better. If you have any tips on how to help it please let me know, if I notice any difference as I go farther I'll let you know


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Quote from: IamTheGoblins on February 23, 2018, 12:15:49 AM
I'm not that far in, I've only been on HRT for a little over a month, so I can't really say if it's gotten better, I'm hoping it will. I have never been able too use a urinal, and it's always been easier for me to go if I sit down, if I know no one is around I have no issue, but if I think someone can hear me, their is no chance it will happen. It's been such a stressful part of my life and I'm praying it will get better. If you have any tips on how to help it please let me know, if I notice any difference as I go farther I'll let you know


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Hi IamTheGoblins.  You deserve a welcome to Susan's Place also! I'm so glad your here!  I'm Jessica, a trans woman.
I see your new here too, so I'll post some links that may help you get better acquainted with the site for you also.

Please feel free to stop by the introductions forum
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,8.0.html to tell the members about yourself.

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Yep.  In the men's room I was "piss shy" ever since puberty or a bit before.  I hated urinals and even in a stall it took a moment or two (or longer) to relax.  Sometimes I had to distract myself by daydreaming about exotic cars in order to get my bladder muscles to relax.

It turns out in retrospect that men's rooms just plain scared me.

Transition cured that problem, but— I was nervous for several months about being in the women's room due to not being passable.  Even so, it was a different kind of nervousness than in the men's room.  I had a much easier time relaxing my bladder and letting go.  Now I don't even care— I just go in and take care of business.  I'm more concerned over whether there is a mirror to check my makeup than I am about the act of urinating.

Oh yes dear, I could not pee in public in the man's room, unless I was in a single stall.

When I started hrt I had to use the ladies room more often then before, I guess because of bladder shrinkage and use of Spiro. Now after GRS it seems like 100 times more then before.

No shy-ness what so ever, just happy I made I to the restroom on time.

I cannot speak to conscientious factors well, but I always retained a lot of urine before GCS in a way that sounds like you describe. It took a long time to go, consisting of several short bursts and then a sense there was more left when "done". Urologists confirmed I was retaining quite a bit and concluded I had BPH but that my prostate didn't seem big due to masking from my hormone treatment.

Three months after GCS I now have the best emptying of my life, albeit a bit messy (minor revision scheduled for next month) and initially still somewhat incomplete. There remains a kink in the urethra my GCS surgeon (who is a gynecologist) confirmed and it will receive surgical treatment then too. I gather that I may have had more kinks when the urethra was longer. 

In the meantime, my surgeon sent me to pelvic physical therapy for two visits.The PT gave me an exercise that I do on the toilet when I feel otherwise done. This exercise empties the remaining amounts from my bladder and similarly for my bowels.

I initially went to my surgeon with GCS as my focus, but the consult included discussion of the difficulty in going and a conclusion, in my case at least, that this would be good for us to follow up with after GCS. If I had not been able or ready for GCS, I still would have still benefited from the initial consult. So I'll urge you to consider a gynecology visit, ideally with someone who does GCS or perhaps fellowed with a GCS surgeon. 

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Hi, Michele!

Welcome to Susan's.

Thank you for sharing your experience.

Please feel free to stop by the Introductions forum to tell the members about yourself.  Here is some information that we like to share with new members:

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I had a shy bladder when I was younger.  I guess I got over it as part of that old "trying to be a real man" thing.

Quote from: Daniellekai on February 23, 2018, 12:15:02 AM
Mentally, who knows... But it definitely makes the prostate smaller, which improves flow quite a bit!

Oh, yes!  I pee like a firehose now, which hasn't happened in several decades.

I had that problem pre transition in men's rooms, so I waited until I had go so bad I was doing the neutron dance, before I used a urinal😀

Spiro's main use is as a diuretic for Congestive Heart Failure. I have been on it for over 25 years. Yes I have to go pee at the most inopportune times. If you have GCS you will stop using Spiro and thus the need to pee will reduce significantly.

Wondering if the privacy of a stall helps?

I had difficulties of using public toilets if there was anyone else there, I just couldn't pee. Usually had to wait, that I was alone.

First time in a night club as myself, woman, going to the womans bathroom I was horrified, that it was crowded almost to the ceiling 

But to my surprise, I could use the toilet just fine even when people were discussing loudly this and that in the bathroom and it was packed with women.

I think the fear of public toilets was part of gender dysphoria, but being among other women, I could use toilet just fine.

Was surprised.

Quote from: Mallory79 on February 22, 2018, 11:54:34 PM
I have always had a shy bladder, long before I realized that I was transgender. I will soon be medically starting to transition from mtf. I am wondering if anyone else on here has had a shy bladder issue prior to their transitioning and if transitioning helped or cured it. Before I had realizes that I was trans, I could never figure out why I could never urinate normally in public, especially in mens bathrooms and now that I know I am hoping that transitioning will help my problem, I assume it will. So have any of you had this problem before transitioning and did it get cured by transitioning? Thanks!!

This is too funny to me. Even when I present as male/when I always presented as male, I always had a very shy bladder. I could never pee in a men's urinal. When I'd try, it would take me FOREVER and I'd just zip up my pants and leave out of embarrassment. I feel ya, girl!

I had "stage fright" forever! The amount of times someone would walk in and I would just stand there and wait until they left before I could go...... Even though most places nowadays have dividers between urinals it didn't help. I would always try to use a toilet but not always possible. Sporting events were a nightmare for me with so many people in there.