I've had the name John for 9 years now, and everyone I know is used to it, but sometimes since a year or so ago, I've felt like I'd rather have the name Lamont instead. I like the sound of the name, and also it starting with the letter "L" would make my initials L.L. which would be pretty cool. Currently I have the same initials as my sister, which is sometimes inconvenient.
I chose "John" cause it was simple, plain yet sophisticated and I didn't want a name that stood out. But I've always been a person who stands out and now I've been wanting for my name to do that too, to better reflect something I've come to like about myself.
And also I feel a little iffy about having chosen a christian name, cause that doesn't go well with me being a satanist, which I became 5 years ago. Had I not been trans and just happened to have a christian name as a satanist it probably wouldn't have bothered me, but since it's a name I chose... yeah.
My thought is I'll just think about it some more, and maybe when I can move to the main land (off from this island) in the quite distant future, make yet another name change as well. But like, I'd be fine with my friends and family still using my current name, cause I feel it would be unreasonable to expect them to change what name they use for me again, after a decade or more of having used my current name. But it also feels like too much of a hassle to change it again no matter when or why.
