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Graceful exit contingency plan if coming out goes sour?

Started by blackcat, April 03, 2018, 11:12:41 PM

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blackcat

I think I have to come out to my dad because it's going to bother me if I don't. I want him to know who I am.

He is ultra-conservative. It's going to blow a huge nerve.

Best case scenario is: "Okay." {{awkward silence}}

Worst case scenario is him saying something ignorant or dismissive.

I have to drop by to pick something up from his house this week and I was thinking of telling him then. I could just leave if he has to calm down.

The question is, what's a graceful thing to say if I decide it's best to leave? I'm not going to fight about it. "I love you, take your time to think about it" ?
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Dee Marshall

Oh, gods, your title scared me!

Yes, telling your dad you love him then putting the contact ball in his court. Just go in knowing that that contact may never come, or it will involve a lot of trying to talk you out of it.

The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.

April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!

Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.

They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!
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Denise

Plan for the worst.
Hope for the best.
Reality will be in the middle.

Be careful to not paint yourself into a corner.

Leave open two way communication.  "I'll wait your call." It may never come.  I suggest, if necessary, "let's talk on Sunday.  Love you."

Then you both have a timeline for figuring out what to say.

Sent from my LG-H910 using Tapatalk

1st Person out: 16-Oct-2015
Restarted Spironolactone 26-Aug-2016
Restarted Estradiol Valerate: 02-Nov-2016
Full time: 02-Mar-2017
Breast Augmentation (Schechter): 31-Oct-2017
FFS (Walton in Chicago): 25-Sep-2018
Vaginoplasty (Schechter): 13-Dec-2018









A haiku in honor of my grandmother who loved them.
The Voices are Gone
Living Life to the Fullest
I am just Denise
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blackcat

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Denise

Quote from: blackcat on April 04, 2018, 08:36:27 AM
Great points about contact. Thank you!
Another thing to remember, you have thought about this for weeks/months/years/decades, he's thought about it for 3 seconds.

If the initial reaction is very negative, be pleasant and understanding.  And "call on Sunday"

Sent from my LG-H910 using Tapatalk

1st Person out: 16-Oct-2015
Restarted Spironolactone 26-Aug-2016
Restarted Estradiol Valerate: 02-Nov-2016
Full time: 02-Mar-2017
Breast Augmentation (Schechter): 31-Oct-2017
FFS (Walton in Chicago): 25-Sep-2018
Vaginoplasty (Schechter): 13-Dec-2018









A haiku in honor of my grandmother who loved them.
The Voices are Gone
Living Life to the Fullest
I am just Denise
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