I've been going to a mostly-women adult exercise class with my cis-husband for a year.  When I started the women's bathroom, which I readily use as a post-op tanswoman, was pretty busy.  Now it isn't used at all except by me.  I figure I'm the reason (I pass but not well enough that people can't tell).  To them I'm a man dressed like a woman, they don't know me but they're obviously put off by me.  I want to live my life but I wasn't intending to infringe on others, you know? 

Assuming I'm correct and they aren't using the bathroom because of me, what do you think... have I trampled on other women's rights by using the women's bathroom?  I wonder what they would say?

Pam 

You said you are post-op. Who cares what they think? Your only other options are: holding it, wearing a diaper, or using a catheter. None of those options sound very pleasant at all.

As a woman, you have the right to use the women's washroom.  If others choose to pee elsewhere, that is their business.  You are not infringing on anyone.

Quote from: Pam on May 07, 2018, 11:23:40 PM
I've been going to a mostly-women adult exercise class with my cis-husband for a year.  When I started the women's bathroom, which I readily use as a post-op tanswoman, was pretty busy.  Now it isn't used at all except by me.  I figure I'm the reason (I pass but not well enough that people can't tell).  To them I'm a man dressed like a woman, they don't know me but they're obviously put off by me.  I want to live my life but I wasn't intending to infringe on others, you know? 

Assuming I'm correct and they aren't using the bathroom because of me, what do you think... have I trampled on other women's rights by using the women's bathroom?  I wonder what they would say?

Pam

You're using the bathroom you have a right to use.

The only way to know what they're thinking is to ask them. 

Hugs, Devlyn

From reading your post, your issue seems to be more about social acceptance than bathrooms. I can suggest two general things (full of little specifics) that will improve your situation. One how your look. Unfair as it seems, people tend to be far more accepting of the different if you look good. The other is to just be a very likable person. I don't mean artificially, but summon up the best of yourself from inside and share it whenever possible. And it all else fails, bring some tasty snacks. Bribery works, too.