Hello everyone, My name is Eliz, I am new here, so it looks like this is the only website that can help me with my problems.
Last 2-3 years I think intensive about transition from male to female, but I am just not sure if its right way for me, you know from my childhood I was very emotional and sensitive kid I cry literary everytime big problem was that I was a boy and according to everyone in my country, boy could not cry, I also wasn't sure about my orientation, for a long time i imagined to kissing with a boy, few years after that I love one girl so i thought everything is alright with my orientation after all, in my puberty i don t have very boyish interest (except computer games) .... I was really into art and history.....everything changed 4 years ago that i saw a first time transgender woman on internet I was fascinated by what hormones can do i thought about it that i would change my gender(now I am going, to be honest with you) shortly after,that made me Sexual arousal(YOP I AM WEIRD)
it just become sexual fantasy, that i masturbated a lot for a few years(btw i masturbate 2-3 times day) I am basically addicted so every time i have dysphoria i masturbate and don't do anything about it,So I started to think Am I even a transgender or ->-bleeped-<- or whatever... this week i started to feel lonely and dysphoric so i tried to interrupted my bad habit(i don t even withstand without masturbation 1 day) i know also that hrt will decrease libido and sex drive but will it destroy my problem? i am just not sure about it anymore look like part of my want to transition because i my life would be better as a woman,and part of me is this weird pervert guy with weird fetish so main question: AM i trans,or not? shout i wait to see a doctor about my transition(btw i am 19 so best age to hrt..) I will be glad to answer my questions, what is your opinion about it... Thank you if you read this entire long text
