Wow, it is so nice to read your update, Donna.  I hope your visit with the stepkids goes well.  The weight loss, mapping out your plans for the future, and your activism all sound so positive.  Way to go!

Hope it goes well with family..... You have made so much progress, be grateful for that

So last night I started thinking, and yes that's a bad thing for me.
The world has a funny way of telling you things and I for one didn't see it even thought it's sort of plain out there.
Last night laying down in bed thoughts turned to my dad. He past in May of 2015
It was at his funeral that I laughed when I found out my molester was dead and at the same time didn't cause his children pain be confronting them as planned at the funeral.
My emotions started breaking thru after that and have come rushing back.
I did know that a lot of my desicions of late have revolved around May since then.
May of 2016 I started buying bras and wearing them for comfort and I had hated dressing up in bras previously and I noticed there was no arousal factor with it like a fetish.
This was all without my wife's knowledge and the wearing was sort of part time. 4/5 days a week but a sport bra to sleep in under my pj's.
In May of 2017 after some thought and research based on my urologist wanting to lower my T but not qualifying for coverage for the meds I started messing with herbals and built the whole cocktail of anti androgens and phytoestrogens and started on the heavy. Things started working well and then my medical came along and the doctor was exposed to the bra and breast changes and it was decided to put me in spiro and dutatriside and do it right. The rest is written about here and that brings me up to May of 2018. The government lowered and or dropped a lot of requirements for gender marker change. I changed my name legally and then my marker and now working in a the rest of the changes. Sure don't realize how many there are. Last night laying in bed thinking about dad and I see the viewing and then the burial and heard my dad in my head and then realized that May just happened again. With all the times I could have processed paperwork I sent it when I did. I didn't know the laws where changing and didn't know what the time delay would be to get the name change back, it had been 3 months at one point.
I dropped off my paperwork to the government office on May 11, they processed the request and approved it on May 16, the three year anniversary of dad's death and I had it in my hand on May 22. The third anniversary of the service and burial and the day I finally released  my pain and emotions. I'm not overly spiritual but this had to be my dad's acceptance of Donna.
And now the tears are flowing

Thank you for your open sharing, I believe that everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we see it sometimes we never do. but from every experience, we learn.

From a comment about trans just being a belief and forcing that belief on other including children and wondering if transgenders should be tolerated.
My responce
The word tolerate should be consider as quiet hatred.
Why should there be tolerance when the only word should be acceptance.
Children should be taught acceptance and inclusion, these children will be the new future to fight hatred and bigotry.
Sorry but I have to really say something now.
No real transgender person would ever try to force ourselves on others. We present ourselves and hope beyond hope to be accepted for our true selve.
This is not a belief.
This is a major and in a lot of cases painfull desicion for one to make.
This is not a belief.
This is a life change to correct what has been wrong inside that some figure out early and other not until later.
This is not a belief.
This is a life saving step for some that are on the verge of ending it all over the internal turmoil our gender dysphoria causes.
Forcing beliefs on a young person, never in your life would any transgender person consider something like that.
The difference- a belief
I believe that one day we can all live our true lives without judgement
I believe that hatred can and will be overcome
I believe all human beings have good in them
I am transgender, I don't believe it I know it with all my being
They are transgender and they know if with all their being
We are not identical in any way, we each do it our way and we know that way suits us.
We know this as a hard and true fact that this is and has been for all our lives
We don't live 10/20/30/40 or more years and then transition only on a belief, it is a long and hard fought battle to get here and not to be taken lightly
If we only had a belief in who we are then we would not put relationships, marriages, families and careers on the line just for a belief. This is a life choice and I chose life.

You tell 'em, sister!

I agree wholeheartedly, Donna.

We must strive and expect full acceptance and not settle for tolerance.

->-bleeped-<- is not a belief but a proven medical/biological fact even if we do not realise ourselves for many, many years.

Frankly it is ridiculous for the opposition to use the word "force"; we would never stoop to that unsavoury tactic.

Wishing you well as always

Pamela

Well today came and went. Work early his mornings and counselling this after noon and in between no stepsons and no grand kids. Seems if they find out about grandma Donna there will be hell to pay. There words not mine and because of this then none of the grandkids can see
me. If the four know them the other two will find out and things could get ugly. This is the most bizarre and strange situation I have ever been in. It's very disappointing and it has put my wife and I at odds with each other.
We don't want to be and we can't live our lives like this. The boys have always been treated very well and the schools here are required to teach acceptance and inclusion so the kids have learnt about all different life styles.
These same parents have had the use of trailers and vehicles and labour and babysitters with out question. So I was glad counseling was today and a plan was devised. It's called the Donna doesn't give a sh-t plan. Sorry bad joke, I do care and so what is going to transpire is I'm going to give the entire subject space for the time being. My wife understands that I have to withdraw from any information or involvement with them. I'm too emotional to not let it show and that makes it harder on her. So just like her counseling sessions I will excuse myeself from the house if they want to come over. If they ask they will be told grandpa left, which is not a lie really as he's not there anymore. We are going to just leave the explanation of this crap to the parents and they can explain there decisions to the kids. I'm not giving up control of my life or my home, what I am doing is protecting Marilyns love for the kids. We need this so we can continue to grow and transition together. It's not a great solution but we are going to give it a try. I did write a scathing email to the boys that I have in reserve and I don't want to send it but may have too. It will go to them and every family member so they don't try to control the narrative.
I hate not being honest and open with the kids but I can't go down that road right now. I have letters to go to them each dated today, sealed and signed so they now these are not written just when the sh-t hits the fan, if it gets to that.
I've learned I need to be the bigger woman now and other things have come up that made me realize I am and can be better than them. I have been accepted into a foundation for transgender children for peer support and as a mentor. I am so pleased that I will be able to try to help a new generation of young men and woman become who they need to be.

So the organization is a non profit that is locally established and run. I have been talking with one of the co founders and she is an amazing lady. This organization has an amazing reputation and has support from the government and medical community. They have short lists for youth with dysphoria issue that need immediate help as waiting list can be extreme.
I think this is a very good place for my energy and it's going to teach me even more about others.
I'm just so pleased to be able to give of my time to try and help others.
I'm getting so involved in the community already. I have two transwomen working for me now and one other employee has a trans son.
I believe anything I can do to support others on their path is what I need to do to share my good fortune to be having my time to transition as well.

I have great respect for you, Donna.

I commend you. I admire you.

You can be so proud that you can utilize your experience as a transwoman to help others on their journey.

Hugs

Pamela

I am sad that you have to go through such shenigans.  I understand the reason, and no doubt it is the right thing to do at the moment, but it must be hard.  I hope the situation gets resolved soon.

What a great idea to volunteer to mentor trans kids!  You are one classy lady, and will be a huge support to those kids.

Donna,

I am catching up.  I see you are still wrestling with those brats of yours.   I hope things get sorted out sooner rather than later.  It is good that you are involved in helping our younger comrades.   Things are better for them than it has been for many of us older folks.  Still, it is not a cake walk by any means.  Good on you to be helpful.

I liked your comments about belief vs fact.  Especially the one about the realty behind the use of of the word "tolerance".  We all know we should "tolerate thy neighbor".  Reminded me of "Love the sinner but hate the sin."   I never could figure out how a person's actions can fulfill both of those things at the same time.  You can do what expresses your disdain for the person's actions or your compassion for the person's needs but not both at the same time.

Work through it and I hope it resolves well and soon for you and your wife's sake.

Hugs to you,
Stevi

Thanks for the comments. I still do believe we need to consider acceptance any where tolerance was used.
My simplistic view of tolerance goes like this.
Great granny has made food for the family picnic, you know you hate it, you know everyone hates it but when you say you tolerate it, you will eat it to be sociable but you still hate it.
Tolerate someone in the lgbtqa+2 world is to say you will put up with them but you hate it.
Unfortunately you will also then not take the time or initiative to learn or understand who or what we are or what we are about.
This is my view and opinion and the way I think.
I love everyone and the diversity we all bring to this wonderful community and wish everyone exactly everything they hope and pray for

https://imgur.com/gallery/KUPoHnL

Quote from: Donna on July 08, 2018, 11:02:03 AM
https://imgur.com/gallery/KUPoHnL

@Donna
All of your recent pictures and your latest Avatar photos are lovely for sure.
You look terrific.
Please continue posting your updates... your followers are always watching for your latest happenings in your life...
Hugs,
Danielle

Thanks. I am just trying to get the pictures to actually open on the post. I'll figure it out someday. Lol

Quote from: Donna on July 08, 2018, 11:16:02 AM
Thanks. I am just trying to get the pictures to actually open on the post. I'll figure it out someday. Lol

@Donna   ... I will be sending you a PM SOON with simple picture posting instructions.... soon!
Hugs,
Danielle

Thanks. I am trying to follow all the instructions but it doesn't seem to like my phone. Lol

Quote from: Donna on July 08, 2018, 11:30:22 AM
Thanks. I am trying to follow all the instructions but it doesn't seem to like my phone. Lol

You need to use a laptop or desktop... your phone does not have the button functions needed
Danielle

Great picture, Donna.  You look fantastic!