I've lurked a bit on here and it's a great community from what I've seen so I finally decided to join.

I started having doubts about gender stuff when I was around 10 and really hated a lot of the things puberty did and just general societal expectations for a "young man".  I tried crossdressing around the same time but it was pretty limited because even then I knew I "had to" hide it. Unfortunately around high school I developed a chronic illness which kind of put my life on hold for the last 15 years.  I continued exploring that side of myself as much as I could in private but I've been stuck at home not really living life, and if anything this just let me put off truly exploring this with anyone.  Oh yeah I'm also a closeted bisexual/pansexual person to make things even more tricky.

Anyway my health condition is finally starting to improve so I really feel like I a need to make up for lost time.  I'm still not sure I want to transition to be female full time but I'd at least want to be a woman more than a man if I could freely openly do it.  I found a therapist who deals with both chronic pain and LGBTQ+ stuff but haven't seen them yet.  I'm kind of nervous but also excited to finally not be completely alone in this.

It's nice to be among other people who have gone or are going through this stuff. 

Hi Kati P 

Welcome to Susan's Place    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Here are some links to the site rules and stuff that we offer to all new members to help them along

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By	Standard Terms & Definitions	Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar)	Cautionary Note
Reputation rules	News posting & quoting guidelines	Photo, avatars, & signature images policy	Membership Agreement

Hugs

V M

@Kati P 
Dear Kati P
Please know that this is a very good place to come and rant and get things off of your chest... lots of members here that will give you and ear and a shoulder to cry on.
I am glad that you have become a member of Susan's Place and that you have shared your posting with other members here on the Forums.

I am thinking that you may lots more questions and concerns, this is the right place for you to be to find out what others have done that may have been in your circumstances.
 
Be aware that there are a lot of members here that can identify with your situation..

I see that our beautiful member @V M has just given you an Official Welcome message... but please allow me to also warmly WELCOME you to Susan's Place. 
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others  and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.  When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others and offer support to others. ....

***It's a very good chance that you might find that you will make some new friends here. 

Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace. 
In her Welcome Message  V M  included Important LINKS that will tell you about Susan's Place.  Included there is information about the site that will help you navigate around and best utilize the features here.   
Please look closely at the LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.   Please don't be a stranger, we want to share postings and thoughts with you.

Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle

Living with dysphoria you can't really do anything about may contribute to some health issues. I know I have become much healthier after going full time. You know, the mind/body connection. For your sake, do not cancel your appointment with that specialist. You eally need to work through this, and see what your best options are.

Oh, and Welcome to Susan's!

Thanks for all the kind greetings and links to stuff explaining the site and everything.   

And I definitely won't cancel my appointment.  I feel like it's super important to talk with someone about these issues and wish I had done it sooner but I know I'm not alone in that either.