short story time

I've always had low self esteem and have always always despised my looks, even before my full realisation that I am transgender I did not like how I looked.
now I've gotten better at makeup I can make myself look pretty but I was still not convinced. believing that people who said that were just being nice because they are my friends or whatever.

I'm also quite lonely so I did a silly thing and signed up to POF.
My phone is a travesty of modern technology and thus I accidentally clicked the list that said I am looking for men. I'm not into men however and by the time I had realised my mistake I was already signed up.
within two hours I had received 37 messages from men. most of them dross like "hi' but most were really complimentary about my looks and smile.
I didn't mention I am trans on my profile btw and I feel that they honestly just think I am a cis woman. I also posted a flattering body photo too (clothed obvs haha).

so it has got me thinking, maybe I CAN pass and live as a woman.

Any other trans people finally reached a point where they think "I can actually do this?" did it last?

Quote from: MissKatie on October 29, 2018, 11:38:55 PM
short story time

I've always had low self esteem and have always always despised my looks, even before my full realisation that I am transgender I did not like how I looked.
now I've gotten better at makeup I can make myself look pretty but I was still not convinced. believing that people who said that were just being nice because they are my friends or whatever.

I'm also quite lonely so I did a silly thing and signed up to POF.
My phone is a travesty of modern technology and thus I accidentally clicked the list that said I am looking for men. I'm not into men however and by the time I had realised my mistake I was already signed up.
within two hours I had received 37 messages from men. most of them dross like "hi' but most were really complimentary about my looks and smile.
I didn't mention I am trans on my profile btw and I feel that they honestly just think I am a cis woman. I also posted a flattering body photo too (clothed obvs haha).

so it has got me thinking, maybe I CAN pass and live as a woman.

Any other trans people finally reached a point where they think "I can actually do this?" did it last?

I think everybody has their ups and downs as far as thinking I can pass or I can't pass but really how long it lasts can really depend on the comments that you get...

All it takes is one person having a bad day to make a mean comment and it makes you feel like you just started transitioning..

I've had it happened several times the way I deal with it is I just let it roll off me.

I really try not to let what other people say negatively about me bother me because nobody has to live with me or accept me but me.

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After about 6 months on hormones I started to pass all but my voice and it's been great. I started to notice I was looking prettier with smoother skin and feeling better about myself and I honestly believe I'll be able to reach a point where I'm a woman 100% and not have to always tell people my past if I don't want to. It's been a wild ride with plenty of ups and downs.


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Quote from: Nikkimn on October 30, 2018, 01:13:50 AM
After about 6 months on hormones I started to pass all but my voice and it's been great. I started to notice I was looking prettier with smoother skin and feeling better about myself and I honestly believe I'll be able to reach a point where I'm a woman 100% and not have to always tell people my past if I don't want to. It's been a wild ride with plenty of ups and downs.


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There are always ups and downs but the journey is so worth it

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Multiple people have told me that I am going to pass very well, but I am very conscientious. I've even been told that I will look better as a woman. They have no reason to lie to me, but deep down I feel that they are just being nice and supportive.

I imagine that we all have doubts. Just be yourself.

🙂 POF is crazy but can be fun. Guys don't read profiles that much, it is still the best bet to put it in your profile then you will still have to point them to read your profile but you will be able to filter out better. I would probably change to looking for women though if I didn't want men, it can get pretty bad. I like men but oh my god it has tested me. I guess that if guys are interested women will be too. Women get pretty bold with other women from what I have seen, and some can be just as bad as men in a way but they accept that no means no.

You do have a pretty smile and there is no reason for you to not believe that you will be a pretty woman. Let go of all of the junk you are telling yourself and be you for a while, you may be surprised at how different others see you as compared to how you see yourself when this is all done.

P.S. It will never last, all women question themselves sometimes.

Quote from: gingerViktorKay on October 30, 2018, 01:45:42 AM
Multiple people have told me that I am going to pass very well, but I am very conscientious. I've even been told that I will look better as a woman. They have no reason to lie to me, but deep down I feel that they are just being nice and supportive.

I imagine that we all have doubts. Just be yourself.

People can be very nice and supportive but it is usually easy to spot if they are being insincere. Let hrt do it's work before judging if you can, chances are they are right.

Quote from: gingerViktorKay on October 30, 2018, 01:45:42 AM
Multiple people have told me that I am going to pass very well, but I am very conscientious. I've even been told that I will look better as a woman. They have no reason to lie to me, but deep down I feel that they are just being nice and supportive.

I imagine that we all have doubts. Just be yourself.

I think it's always much easier for us to be critical of ourselves and not give ourselves a credit that we deserve about our looks I myself sometimes when people tell me you're looking more feminine or you look pretty I think they're just trying to be nice

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You are pretty!
And I know what you mean about the sites..i left one after two hours due to penis pics!
And when i was out on Saturday a couple of men said I was beaitiful and I was so chuffed..but more chuffed when a CIS woman said my outfit was cute.

I allow myself to be a little deluded from time to time...i'm too big and too manly to pass without hormones, but compliments make my heart skip a beat

I never expected to pass.  I was doing this transition for me, and I didn't really care what the muggles saw, as long as they were polite. 

So it came as a pleasant shock recently when I found that I did pass.  In a clothing store last week, my wife and I were talking to the shopkeeper about world affairs (the way you do in clothing stores! ).  Assuming it was obvious that I was trans, from my voice if nothing else, I started talking about how I have been received in our little village by saying, "I am probably the first trans person they have seen..."  Her look of puzzlement followed by a big smile told me that she had had no idea.  (I had talked to her enough in the past that I knew she would be supportive.)

Quote from: MissKatie on October 29, 2018, 11:38:55 PM
so it has got me thinking, maybe I CAN pass and live as a woman.

If I can do it, Katie, so can you!  You are quite pretty.

My experience with PoF is that it's mainly used for hook ups. I live in a military town and seems both men and women use it for mainly frivolous hook ups.

I feel ya on the lonely part. I'm in the same boat. The past week has really been a struggle for me. It seems my friends are all too busy for any socializing. I would love to meet someone in my area to start going to the gym with, but my social anxiety just won't let me go anywhere to find someone to that with!

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@MissKatie - going by your profile pic, you totally already pass and you're *already* a pretty woman! Keep on, keeping on gyrl... ;-) xoxo

Speaking of POF. I been on there for two weeks. I must say I love the site, the men etc. I met an older gentleman in his late 50's. He wasn't really attractive to me, but he left me a sincere long message asking to get to know me. We talked back n forth then he asked me out to dinner. I don't have trans anywhere on my profile. We went out to dinner at a Vietnamese restaurant. He said my pof pictures don't do me justice lol. He expressed I'm more attractive in person. He asked me as we sat down at our table how is a woman like me single? I gave him a condensed version of a long story. "Rocky breakup" "trust issues" "casual hookups". The food was fabulous. I never told him I'm trans. He wants to see me again.

Quote from: Ms. Bee on October 31, 2018, 02:02:03 PM
Speaking of POF. I been on there for two weeks. I must say I love the site, the men etc. I met an older gentleman in his late 50's. He wasn't really attractive to me, but he left me a sincere long message asking to get to know me. We talked back n forth then he asked me out to dinner. I don't have trans anywhere on my profile. We went out to dinner at a Vietnamese restaurant. He said my pof pictures don't do me justice lol. He expressed I'm more attractive in person. He asked me as we sat down at our table how is a woman like me single? I gave him a condensed version of a long story. "Rocky breakup" "trust issues" "casual hookups". The food was fabulous. I never told him I'm trans. He wants to see me again.

@Ms. Bee
This something that any of us transgenders have to deal with.... 
... first, it was wonderful that you had a great first date, but it is wise that if this relationship progresses much more then, sooner rather than later, I think that you need to come-out to this individual....  in my own situation, it was always BEFORE the first kiss and other more intimate hugs, cuddling, and other things.   

It is only fair to the one that you are dating, man or woman, trans, etc.
Just my opinion, that is all....

Good luck to you on your future relationships and possible romantic entanglements!!!
Please keep us posted!
Hugs,
Danielle

Starting transition at 53?  I fully expected to look like a guy in women's clothing.  My only hope for hormones was that they would cure my anxiety, stop the panic attacks and lower my blood pressure.

I got all that, but they also turned me into a girl who is slowly growing into a woman of a certain age.

Just today a cisgender female friend (and my goodness I love having close female friends now and being one of the girls) told me how beautiful I looked and said when she saw me walking up to the courthouse (we're lawyers) she thought to herself, "Who's that gorgeous woman?"


I might be a little big in the hands and bony in the face, but with the right clothes and makeup, and letting the estrogen control my mannerisms, I'm passable.  My voice is hit or miss, but I figure that is going to be the next big thing after facial hair removal and FFS.

I may not be as pretty as I was in my youth. And I may not be pretty in the eyes of other people. But I feel pretty, I look pretty to me, I like being pretty.
And that counts most for me.

Quote from: MissKatie on October 29, 2018, 11:38:55 PM
...now I've gotten better at makeup I can make myself look pretty but I was still not convinced. believing that people who said that were just being nice because they are my friends or whatever...
Any other trans people finally reached a point where they think "I can actually do this?" did it last?

I'm not pretty. I wish I was, but I think I just need more time on hormones first. Maybe FFS.

My sister tells me I'm beautiful, and that I just need to accept myself. I've had a handful of other people say similar things to me, and yeah, I'm not ugly. But beautiful? I just can't bring myself to believe that.

Quote from: Angela H on October 31, 2018, 04:52:28 PM
I'm not pretty. I wish I was, but I think I just need more time on hormones first. Maybe FFS.

My sister tells me I'm beautiful, and that I just need to accept myself. I've had a handful of other people say similar things to me, and yeah, I'm not ugly. But beautiful? I just can't bring myself to believe that.

It is true what they say beauty is in the eye of the beholder but if you want opinions on how you look just post a picture of you there's a can I pass thread you can post on

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Quote from: MissKatie on October 29, 2018, 11:38:55 PM
short story time

I've always had low self esteem and have always always despised my looks, even before my full realisation that I am transgender I did not like how I looked.
now I've gotten better at makeup I can make myself look pretty but I was still not convinced. believing that people who said that were just being nice because they are my friends or whatever.

I'm also quite lonely so I did a silly thing and signed up to POF.
My phone is a travesty of modern technology and thus I accidentally clicked the list that said I am looking for men. I'm not into men however and by the time I had realised my mistake I was already signed up.
within two hours I had received 37 messages from men. most of them dross like "hi' but most were really complimentary about my looks and smile.
I didn't mention I am trans on my profile btw and I feel that they honestly just think I am a cis woman. I also posted a flattering body photo too (clothed obvs haha).

so it has got me thinking, maybe I CAN pass and live as a woman.

Any other trans people finally reached a point where they think "I can actually do this?" did it last?

Yes, I put a profile on a dating site and got 45 replies. This made me think... perhaps I do pass. Then, no less than two people showed a serious interest in me... as a woman . This I find hard to credit but it must be so! Just need to flush the doubts.

Quote from: MissKatie on October 29, 2018, 11:38:55 PM
short story time

I've always had low self esteem and have always always despised my looks, even before my full realisation that I am transgender I did not like how I looked.
now I've gotten better at makeup I can make myself look pretty but I was still not convinced. believing that people who said that were just being nice because they are my friends or whatever.

I'm also quite lonely so I did a silly thing and signed up to POF.
My phone is a travesty of modern technology and thus I accidentally clicked the list that said I am looking for men. I'm not into men however and by the time I had realised my mistake I was already signed up.
within two hours I had received 37 messages from men. most of them dross like "hi' but most were really complimentary about my looks and smile.
I didn't mention I am trans on my profile btw and I feel that they honestly just think I am a cis woman. I also posted a flattering body photo too (clothed obvs haha).

so it has got me thinking, maybe I CAN pass and live as a woman.

Any other trans people finally reached a point where they think "I can actually do this?" did it last?

I am also on POF, but still as a male.  I live in an area where older male are not readily available, and I get daily several requests from women who want to meet me.  POF is not that bad, bad there are a lot of scammers in it.  One has to be very careful.

Quote from: Dietlind on October 31, 2018, 10:09:05 PM
I am also on POF, but still as a male.  I live in an area where older male are not readily available, and I get daily several requests from women who want to meet me.  POF is not that bad, bad there are a lot of scammers in it.  One has to be very careful.

I used to the whole dating website thing but it never quite worked out for me so I'm kind of to the point I'll find somebody eventually yeah I'm going to look but I'm not looking hard if they find me and they're interested in me then I'm here if not oh well

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