So I'm sure some of you have seen this, but some may not have. There is a viral video circling the internet right now that directly affects the trans community. In the video, a trans woman erupts on a GameStop employee threatening him and picking a fight over being misgendered. Link to a news article regarding the incident can be found below. Just curious what your views are on this?

Personally, I believe the individual in this video is DEAD WRONG. I understand being misgendered sucks. It's hard to go through a transition and constantly be shot down by the unaccepting public eye. However, this is not the way to solve the worlds problems. This is disgusting. It upsets me more seeing someone who apparently defends trans rights shoot us in the foot by showing the public we are exactly what they think we are. Mentally unstable, crazy and sick. This is animalistic behavior.

Anyway here's a link to the video. What do you think? Handled properly?

< Link to "Transgender goes off on GameStop Employee" video removed by moderator - Susan's Terms of Service >

Quote from: Sky1090 on December 29, 2018, 09:44:02 PM
So I'm sure some of you have seen this, but some may not have. There is a viral video circling the internet right now that directly affects the trans community. In the video, a trans woman erupts on a GameStop employee threatening him and picking a fight over being misgendered. Link to a news article regarding the incident can be found below. Just curious what your views are on this?

Personally, I believe the individual in this video is DEAD WRONG. I understand being misgendered sucks. It's hard to go through a transition and constantly be shot down by the unaccepting public eye. However, this is not the way to solve the worlds problems. This is disgusting. It upsets me more seeing someone who apparently defends trans rights shoot us in the foot by showing the public we are exactly what they think we are. Mentally unstable, crazy and sick. This is animalistic behavior.

Anyway here's a link to the video. What do you think? Handled properly?

< Link to "Transgender goes off on GameStop Employee" video removed by moderator - Susan's Terms of Service >

I wonder if that really is a transwoman? If so Huge Cringe Factor! Not to mention extremely bad manners.
Maybe its an anti-trans activist trying to discredit trans people?

Thanks for making us aware of this Sky!

Kirsten[emoji102]

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And the worst part about the whole thing is how the public has taken this. Honestly, I don't even blame the public. I feel person in this video has brought a huge shame to our community. You want us to be viewed as equal in the public eye? Don't act like a fool.

And excuse me for speaking out of turn but what upsets me the most is she is picking a fight (like a high school bully) with this poor guy behind the counter who by mistake probably misgendered based on voice. It's an easy mistake. I do not have respect for her in the slightest. <Removed by moderator, Susan's Terms of Service #10>

You think this behavior equals standing up for our rights and for yourself? Think again. This just set the whole community about a million steps back. <Removed by moderator, TOS 5> Reason to ignore us and claim this is truly a mental disease.

Kirsten I totally agree with you. <Removed by moderator, TOS 10> Whatever this is, it's not right. <Removed by moderator, TOS 10>

Here's some of the YouTube comments on this video. I've gone through 3 pages of comments and each is worse than the last.



<Several images removed by moderator, TOS 4>

This may be controversial, but I have been thinking lately that people have a right to call us sir or ma'am as they perceive us.  I get angry and depressed and hurt when I am called sir but I don't think that I have any right to demand that someone change there firmly held beliefs about me.  It's a free country.  And mostly civilized.  When people are educated on ->-bleeped-<- 90% of them will do the right thing but demanding people think a certain way is Orwellian IMO.

Also, I agree this could be all fake.

Quote from: Janes Groove on December 29, 2018, 11:10:46 PM
This may be controversial, but I have been thinking lately that people have a right to call us sir or ma'am as they perceive us.  I get angry and depressed and hurt when I am called sir but I don't think that I have any right to demand that someone change there firmly held beliefs about me.  It's a free country.  And mostly civilized.  When people are educated on ->-bleeped-<- 90% of them will do the right thing but demanding people think a certain way is Orwellian IMO.

Also, I agree this could be all fake.

That's exactly the point I was trying to get at. You summed everything up very well!


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I went to YouTube and watched the video.  Some observations:

1.  Lots of guys are reposting it in a pathetic effort to gain or drive web traffic.

2.  She looks like the real deal.  (She has long hair, no beard shadow and breasts and facial contours appear to indicate some HRT)

3.  Having a public meltdown over being misgendered and doing it on video makes us all look bad.

4.  Maybe she was low on hormones, or just had a bad day, or may have a comorbid autism condition or mental health condition.

5.  Maybe she was set up.  The timing of the video is suspicious.

I am really sorry this happened.  But, this is how it is.  The young women who work at my favorite gas station still call me "sir" but they knew me before transition, they are friendly, and there is no malice in it.  I'm not going to trouble myself trying to correct them; there is nothing to be gained by it.

I've been intentionally misgendered twice, both times by tall, macho looking middle aged men.  I don't go looking for fights.  It happens, it sucks, but if you want to win a war, you choose your battles.  And if you want to win a war for acceptance, you learn diplomacy.

Hugs, Carly

locked for review

I can't see this thread going anywhere good.


This comment alone should never be posted on this site as it is transphobic.

"This does not strike me as a trans woman. This strikes me at best as a crossdresser who is not at ease with themselves."

Please read the TOS before posting such comments and threads again.

Topic is now unlocked after edits by moderator.

The behavior of the individual in question does not reflect well on us.

I've been saying this for a while here. Going about the world with hostility toward others doesn't endear us in general to anyone. The pronouns issue is one where if we start acting like this person we will not have the public on side. We're going to need the public on side in the future because the world is changing and with it the laws and attitudes will change. We may not always have legal protections. Being over zealous in asserting your "right" to be called x y z may work today but you can see the public's reaction to the video - we may not have those rights tomorrow. Better to be seen as civil and non-threatening than hostile, rude or crazy (because I do believe we will always be a biological minority).

A faulty generalization is a conclusion about all or many instances of a phenomenon that has been reached on the basis of just one or just a few instances of that phenomenon.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Faulty_generalization

How do you think cis-males would respond if people assumed some of there worst were indicative of the general population? 

In other words this is a dishonest smear.

Have a nice day,
Paige

This hit piece was published on YouTube by Marcus Rodgers an evangelist minister. Who has just gotten divorced. A closely held religious belief. Not.  Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold through sickness and health, for richer or poorer, until death us do part.

I haven't seen it yet, but is it too hard to ask what a person's pronoun is? If a person looks gender non conforming in 2018, why lead off with "Sir?"

On the other hand, you have to have self control because as the customer, you are in power. You can tell the gamestop worker - "You just talked yourself out of a sale". And walk off. Then warn other trans people on social media and trans allies to stay away. The story should be about the company's failings, not your behaviour. That's assuming this isn't a set up.  I understand the desire to make them understand that they hurt  you but one must realize anyone who intentionally misgenders is a troll. Just like how TERFS use dudebro and all kinds of completely unnecessary labels on transwomen. It's a malicious attack designed to hurt.

Quote from: DawnOday on December 30, 2018, 11:40:28 AM
This hit piece was published on YouTube by Marcus Rodgers an evangelist minister. Who has just gotten divorced. A closely held religious belief. Not.  Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold through sickness and health, for richer or poorer, until death us do part.

This Rodgers cat is a real piece of work.  He got kicked out of the army after managing to drown a fellow soldier while baptizing him.  https://www.christianpost.com/news/popular-internet-preacher-marcus-rogers-announces-divorce-losing-job-with-army.html

Quote from: Janes Groove on December 29, 2018, 11:10:46 PM
This may be controversial, but I have been thinking lately that people have a right to call us sir or ma'am as they perceive us.  I get angry and depressed and hurt when I am called sir but I don't think that I have any right to demand that someone change there firmly held beliefs about me.  It's a free country.  And mostly civilized.  When people are educated on ->-bleeped-<- 90% of them will do the right thing but demanding people think a certain way is Orwellian IMO.

Also, I agree this could be all fake.

I am so glad to hear someone else say this.

I know that people have different thresholds for being triggered by being misgendered, and this woman may have heard "Sir" for the umpteenth time and just exploded. If that's the case, I sympathize.

But this kind of behavior cannot be tolerated in a public place. It's uncivil. If I were working at the store, I would have asked her to leave, then called the police if she didn't. Abusing the stock as she did justified it, but so did her cursing.

Quote from: Ann W on December 30, 2018, 09:10:35 PM
I am so glad to hear someone else say this.

I know that people have different thresholds for being triggered by being misgendered, and this woman may have heard "Sir" for the umpteenth time and just exploded. If that's the case, I sympathize.

But this kind of behavior cannot be tolerated in a public place. It's uncivil. If I were working at the store, I would have asked her to leave, then called the police if she didn't. Abusing the stock as she did justified it, but so did her cursing.

I think if this person would have been as cis person, this person would  have reacted similar caused by another wording , the person would have considered to be an insult.  This reaction  had nothing to do with trans or any gender, it was just the reaction of an angry person out of control!

LOL I hate how people judge all of us on things like this.
Ther is CIS men and women who have big melt downs like this too.
But in the end of they day totally unfemale traits to go nuts like that.
An embarrassment really :/

There's a cisgender woman who had a meltdown on an airplane when a man with a medical emergency had to get off and it delayed their flight. She became belligerent and threatened to have the attendant sniper'd. Yet, when it was reported on, they mentioned her PTSD from war time to elicit empathy. Where is our empathy for this GameStop woman? We don't know her life but we all know the pain being constantly misgendered can inflict. Shouldn't her situation be treated with the same respect to her trauma? It saddens me that even here we're so quick to distance ourselves from her, to label her an outlier, and question her validity. She behaved badly but condemn the sin not the sinner.

Quote from: elle's bells on December 31, 2018, 04:21:48 AM
There's a cisgender woman who had a meltdown on an airplane when a man with a medical emergency had to get off and it delayed their flight. She became belligerent and threatened to have the attendant sniper'd. Yet, when it was reported on, they mentioned her PTSD from war time to elicit empathy. Where is our empathy for this GameStop woman? We don't know her life but we all know the pain being constantly misgendered can inflict. Shouldn't her situation be treated with the same respect to her trauma? It saddens me that even here we're so quick to distance ourselves from her, to label her an outlier, and question her validity. She behaved badly but condemn the sin not the sinner.

Hi Elle,

You're right we shouldn't judge without walking a mile in her shoes but at the same time all transgender people shouldn't be generalized over one or a few incidents.   I don't think these two points are mutually exclusive.

Take care,
Paige

The issue is the whole community getting judged by the action of one individual in one incident.  This is fairly common for minorities.

There are videos of white cis people losing their s*** and the reaction is "wow that person is nuts". A minority loses their s*** and its "wow, (insert minority group)s are nuts".

Here is a good read on that

https://genderexpressive.wordpress.com/2018/12/30/held-to-a-higher-standard/




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Transgender people are people just like everyone else. And guess what? There are a lot of unstable people out there, trans or cis.