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When is the best time to come out as mtf, realizing that answers will vary?

Started by ChrissyRyan, December 02, 2018, 06:43:03 AM

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When is the best time to come out as mtf, realizing that answers will vary?

When you often have "male fail" while out in male clothing and no makeup
3 (11.1%)
When you start hrt with estrogen
2 (7.4%)
When you are on hrt with estrogen and people often ask you what your gender is
1 (3.7%)
When you can pass most of the time
1 (3.7%)
When you commited yourself to go full-time
7 (25.9%)
As soon as you realize you are a woman
7 (25.9%)
At this time, although I am a trans-woman (mtf), I have no plans to ever out myself
1 (3.7%)
When my gender therapist thought I should, that is, asked me to try to do so
0 (0%)
I outed myself while I was still questioning my gender
3 (11.1%)
Someone outed me, word got around.
0 (0%)
I do not know, I have not come out as mtf transgender, but I plan to do so someday
2 (7.4%)

Total Members Voted: 27

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pamelatransuk

#20
December 04, 2018, 05:08:27 AM
Quote from: DawnOday on December 03, 2018, 05:17:26 PM
I came out one month after starting HRT. If conditions were right, I would have come out 40+ years ago before I withdrew to my shell. If the resources today existed back then. I really feel "ooh la la" If I knew what I know now, when I was younger. Going all the way would be the way to go.

Quote from: NatalieRene on December 03, 2018, 05:24:50 PM
I can only imagine how hard it was.
I have a bit of a glimpse listening to the accounts of early twenties and under transitioning and wishing I could have sooner.

Dawn/NatalieRene

As you may know I started at 62 with therapy and HRT and will go fulltime in 2019 aged 64 and come out to other then. But Oh Yes it is so much better for those in their teens and early 20s now and I am so happy they can transition earlier and live a greater part of their life as their true selves.

If only I could have started and gone fulltime in 1977 and 1979 instead of 2017 and 2019!

Hugs to all

Pamela


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femchick67

#21
December 04, 2018, 12:54:21 PM
when you feel comfortable and confident you will no when the time is right its not a easy decision to make takes alot of guts i wish you all the best when you do
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ChrissyRyan

#22
January 02, 2019, 06:28:46 PM
Yes, this certainly is a personal decision.  We each must do what is best for ourselves.

After we decide to start letting people know, then who you disclose to and in what order can also be significant decisions.  I think it is wise to tell people you told about your mtf status to not tell others that you are trans, to let that disclosure be up to yourself on a person by person basis.


Chrissy

Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 
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BlueJaye

#23
January 02, 2019, 06:52:14 PM
I avoided coming out for decades. I have come to the conclusion that there is never a good time to come out. There is always some obstacle or fear or something that will convince you not to. I finally did after I nearly attempted suicide and literally felt that coming out and transitioning were the best and safest things for me and my family. I had reached the point where there was no other way forward.
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pamelatransuk

#24
January 03, 2019, 05:55:28 AM
Quote from: ChrissyRyan on January 02, 2019, 06:28:46 PM
Yes, this certainly is a personal decision.  We each must do what is best for ourselves.

After we decide to start letting people know, then who you disclose to and in what order can also be significant decisions.  I think it is wise to tell people you told about your mtf status to not tell others that you are trans, to let that disclosure be up to yourself on a person by person basis.

Chrissy

Hello again

I have already commented at replies 13&20.

I just wish to add that I agree with you entirely in that we should come out to each person individually and others should NOT pass on the news. However I strongly suspect that some people may suspect anyway before we come out in view of the subtle gradual physical changes pursuant to HRT.

I am 11 months HRT and I now thankfully have boobs which after 14 months in April should be difficult to hide!

Hugs to all

Pamela


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