Quote from: Sky1090 on December 29, 2018, 09:44:02 PM
So I'm sure some of you have seen this, but some may not have. There is a viral video circling the internet right now that directly affects the trans community. In the video, a trans woman erupts on a GameStop employee threatening him and picking a fight over being misgendered. Link to a news article regarding the incident can be found below. Just curious what your views are on this?

Personally, I believe the individual in this video is DEAD WRONG. I understand being misgendered sucks. It's hard to go through a transition and constantly be shot down by the unaccepting public eye. However, this is not the way to solve the worlds problems. This is disgusting. It upsets me more seeing someone who apparently defends trans rights shoot us in the foot by showing the public we are exactly what they think we are. Mentally unstable, crazy and sick. This is animalistic behavior.

Anyway here's a link to the video. What do you think? Handled properly?

< Link to "Transgender goes off on GameStop Employee" video removed by moderator - Susan's Terms of Service >

Yes I have seen the video. The person is really wrong.  Stuff happens...suck it up buttercup and move on!!   Why draw more attention to yourself as well as our community...like now it is gathering so much media attention......bad publicity is no good.

She should have just moved along.

My opinion only.....

Interesting how no one's seemed to be able to find her name. No news outlet, no matter how trasphobic, has been able to find her social media. Gamestop has offered no statement, and no one involved in the incident has said anything. It's just a bunch of right wing outlets sharing and repeating the same article.

Very suspicious.  Very set up.

Quote from: JMJW on January 01, 2019, 11:31:31 AM
Interesting how no one's seemed to be able to find her name. No news outlet, no matter how trasphobic, has been able to find her social media. Gamestop has offered no statement, and no one involved in the incident has said anything. It's just a bunch of right wing outlets sharing and repeating the same article.

Very suspicious.  Very set up.

I wonder if it wasn't a set up for some fake news propaganda?

I watched this video several times. Thanks for sharing. I applaud this woman for going out in her truth. She came across so upset and enraged for more reasons than one. I really want to give her a big hug, and whisk her away.

Quote from: Ms. Bee on January 04, 2019, 07:50:49 PM
I watched this video several times. Thanks for sharing. I applaud this woman for going out in her truth. She came across so upset and enraged for more reasons than one. I really want to give her a big hug, and whisk her away.

Personally I feel like behaviour like this deserves a slap more than anything.
Be they trans or not!

I've seen people of all stripes behaving this way, could be a set up but I kind of doubt it. The way the shopkeeper responded was exactly the way they are supposed to, the rest of the people in the shop behaved the way they typically would when a random person kicks off - and the person recording started in the middle of the exchange and was trying to keep out of sight while recording, which makes sense.

The fact they haven't been found and identified is probably a good thing if it's a real incident - but that argument goes both ways: if it's real someone will eventually identify who it is, and if it's an actor, someone will eventually identify who it is. I'm sure there's curious types on both sides wanting to expose who this person is, you know what the internet's like.

Why don't you just drop this sir and ma'am system? Feels so old.

It's been several days and we still know nothing about this person. Nobody has said anything. The employee and everyone else might be real, but it could easily be a transphobic cis dude in make up and clothes. This individual didn't look like they'd been on HRT. It's too many of the worst stereotypes packed into just a minute and a half. It's too concentrated to be real life.

Quote from: JMJW on January 01, 2019, 11:31:31 AM
Interesting how no one's seemed to be able to find her name. No news outlet, no matter how trasphobic, has been able to find her social media. Gamestop has offered no statement, and no one involved in the incident has said anything. It's just a bunch of right wing outlets sharing and repeating the same article.

Very suspicious.  Very set up.

Am in a Facebook group that this woman posted to in an attempt to defend herself. It is a trans feminine forum and the responses to her were quite critical. Based on that, I do not believe this to be a setup.

At the end of the day she picked the wrong battle and because someone recorded it, will haunted for many many moons. Viral videos can do a lot of damage and this to me was a form of bullying back at her. She could lose her job and already faces public shaming.

I do feel bad for the woman but also did have to wonder if she really is trans based on the video; I saw a man in women's clothes based on the posture, voice, mannerisms, attitude and aggressiveness. That's my stereotyping as a Tran woman, so I can see why she got misgendered.

I view misgendering internally and as a reality check in how I am perceived, and try to understand what in that moment, despite my attire, makeup, DD breasts and long hair caused it. Lately that happens once or less a month, but it wasn't always that way.

At the end of the day this video pisses me off because it is being used for anti trans propaganda. A friend of a friend of my ex tagged me in it. I was so stunned to be associated with this that I cried and called my ex who was equally stunned. A typical female reaction by both of us.

This is a good example of
1. We are a minority group
2. We are not understood and generally considered somewhere on a spectrum from "not normal" to "mentally ill"
3. We live in a society of fear and hate, particularly since the start of the 2016 election cycle
4. Each one of us can cause damage to the way others are perceived

This brings back the old conversation about passing and if it is important or not. To me it is very important. I fo not identify as a man or as a trans woman. I identify as a woman, which means that my trans-ness is between me and God and I don't want everyone else to be in on that knowledge. That's just my needs and desires and everyone is different, but this video highlights my intrinsic need to not be identified as trans and associated with that kind of caricature of trans women represented in this video.

Quote from: JMJW on January 05, 2019, 07:03:51 AM
It's been several days and we still know nothing about this person. Nobody has said anything. The employee and everyone else might be real, but it could easily be a transphobic cis dude in make up and clothes. This individual didn't look like they'd been on HRT. It's too many of the worst stereotypes packed into just a minute and a half. It's too concentrated to be real life.

This has what to do with what?

Quote from: TonyaW on December 31, 2018, 09:03:58 AM
Here is a good read on that

https://genderexpressive.wordpress.com/2018/12/30/held-to-a-higher-standard/

       Great article Tonya! Very spot-on considering the fact that many of us, not all, indeed hold ourselves to "the higher standard" and would never do this, just *shrug* it off instead.

Quote from: Swedishgirl96 on January 05, 2019, 05:58:20 AM
Why don't you just drop this sir and ma'am system? Feels so old.

It's called "gender-neutralism" Swedishgirl of which am a big proponent but don't agree with the language police part I get alternately 'sir' & 'ma'am' just 'bout everyday and NO BIG DEAL! It's The World that's fast moving away from "a gender binary" but not me, I take great refuge/satisfaction in keeping at bay? (edit: no contributing to) the utter confusion of modern "cis society" everyday!

Apparently, if in Sweden, I'd be a "hen"? lol Don't think so not too keen on NewYorkCity's new 'X' factor either! My BC is from Nassau County and even NY State changes are fast becoming really easy!

Is this even real? It reminds me of some prank you would see on one of those idiotic shows like impractical jokers or jackass. I find it hard to believe a transwoman would act this way. The way this person acted, what they said, how they said it and the fact they started kicking displays seemed the way a man would act if he got pissed off. Especially challenging the clerk to step outside. The clerk looked genuinely frightened and I don't blame him. If this is real I don't understand this persons extreme reaction to being misgendered. No doubt I will get attacked for saying this but I find it hard to believe this person being gendered Sir is a rare occurrence. Real or not it's no surprise this has gone viral. The media loves anything that portrays trans people as freaks, perverts or mentally unstable. It's most unfortunate when some trans people act that way giving them exactly what they want.

Quote from: Devlyn on January 05, 2019, 07:26:13 AM
This has what to do with what?

That it could have been an actor. Obviously an actor isn't going to go on HRT to make a viral video. There's method acting, but no one's going that far.

QuoteAm in a Facebook group that this woman posted to in an attempt to defend herself. It is a trans feminine forum and the responses to her were quite critical. Based on that, I do not believe this to be a setup.

What was the defence? The video begins with f bombs, so it stands to reason something bad happened beforehand. Was it really about being misgendered while being denied a refund on a video game?

Quote from: Julia1996 on January 05, 2019, 08:11:53 AM
Is this even real? It reminds me of some prank you would see on one of those idiotic shows like impractical jokers or jackass. I find it hard to believe a transwoman would act this way. The way this person acted, what they said, how they said it and the fact they started kicking displays seemed the way a man would act if he got pissed off. Especially challenging the clerk to step outside. The clerk looked genuinely frightened and I don't blame him. If this is real I don't understand this persons extreme reaction to being misgendered. No doubt I will get attacked for saying this but I find it hard to believe this person being gendered Sir is a rare occurrence. Real or not it's no surprise this has gone viral. The media loves anything that portrays trans people as freaks, perverts or mentally unstable. It's most unfortunate when some trans people act that way giving them exactly what they want.

This was exactly the point I was trying to make. This post has been a topic of controversy here the last few days.

To those who viewed some of the things I said as transphobic or resentful towards our community, I apologize. However, I do believe in the power of a first impression and public perception. If we expect the public to accept us and over time grow to be more accepting of us, we need to have thick skin. People suck. It's the nature of life. Throwing a temper tantrum is NOT how we fight for our rights to be equal. This leads the general public to mock, criticize and further deny our existence.

I had my first account being blatantly misgendered on Thursday. It honestly caught me completely off guard. In my opinion, I'm not the most attractive woman. I feel like I can pass in the public eye, but I feel like there are certain parts of me that "give me away."

I got off the L downtown Chicago and started heading to my therapy appointment. As soon as I left the train station, I had a gentleman promoting something for a store look me dead in the eye and say "excuse me sir, can I ask you a question?" Did I kick over his display and cause a scene? Absolutely not. I stood my ground with my head held high and with a smile replied "Excuse me sir, but do you really think I'm a sir?" He turned 4 shades of red and apologized profusely.

Point is, you get a lot more respect out of people when you treat them with respect. If you want respect, you must be respectful. Even if someone says something completely hurtful without thinking, overcome their ignorance with kindness. This is a war for equal rights, not a battle. If people in our community continue to fight battles by causing disturbances and scenes like this for the internet bullies to film, post, remix and play up to their liking, we will lose the war overall. This behavior is totally unacceptable.


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Quote from: JMJW on January 05, 2019, 08:37:25 AM
That it could have been an actor. Obviously an actor isn't going to go on HRT to make a viral video. There's method acting, but no one's going that far.

What was the defence? The video begins with f bombs, so it stands to reason something bad happened beforehand. Was it really about being misgendered while being denied a refund on a video game?

Or it could be a transgender woman, perhaps a transgender woman who will someday come to this very site looking for support and instead finding people questioning her very identity because she isn't some delicate flower expressing every stereotype of femininity on what seems to be a very bad day for her.

Frankly, some of the posts in this thread are atrocious, the amount of edits and penalties already assessed by the staff attest to that, and I will be glad if this cesspool is locked, and or preferably deleted before this woman has the chance to see the way her "community" is speaking about her. She had a bad day. The sooner she, and we, put it behind us, the better for everyone.

QuoteOr it could be a transgender woman, perhaps a transgender woman who will someday come to this very site looking for support and instead finding people questioning her very identity because she isn't some delicate flower expressing every stereotype of femininity on what seems to be a very bad day for her.

That we heard nothing for a week beyond the same article shared by rednecks is what aroused doubt and suspicion, as well it should. We got nothing from gamestop, the filmer, the uploader, from any media site, from the community, from a woman who said she would galvanize the entire LGBT against Gamestop.

To characterize this as me looking at just her presentation and behaviour and saying clearly a cis dude - that is a strawman argument. I don't make that claim. 

Because I agree that we need gender acceptance for the butch and badly behaved transwomen too. They shouldn't have their woman card revoked in the court of public opinion. It's easy to get gender acceptance for the passing or near passing and well behaved. The real fight is for people like this because a transwoman's gender can't be conditional on such things as behaviour or criminality.

I'm sorry, hate me, call me hypocritical or whatever you may, but "having a bad day" is no excuse for the vulgarity, violence and threats. That's plain wrong. Man or woman, that's wrong. Think before you act. What upsets me most about this is this just gives people more ammo against us and it could have been totally avoided by taking a minute to breath and walk away


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Quote from: Sky1090 on January 05, 2019, 09:13:57 AM
I'm sorry, hate me, call me hypocritical or whatever you may, but "having a bad day" is no excuse for the vulgarity, violence and threats. That's plain wrong. Man or woman, that's wrong. Think before you act. What upsets me most about this is this just gives people more ammo against us and it could have been totally avoided by taking a minute to breath and walk away.


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That kinda describes posting it here, too, doesn't it?

... not sure how the two are the same thing but that's okay.


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Yeah I'm going to need some help with how throwing a temper tantrum in a store is in any way related to posting on a forum.