I just came out and started hormones December 7th. I know I have a long ways to go, but I like to plan ahead. I am positive I will need some pretty extensive FFS and I know that can take a long time to go from consultation to procedure. However, I don't know how long I should be on hormones prior to consultation.

I am hoping on coming out at my job and going full time the summer of 2020. Ideally I would get FFS and be full time immediately after recovery. I read the excellent "How I got insurance to pay for FFS" posted by JLT1 and I can see that there will be a lot of time and work required. In addition, other procedures such as electrolysis, and things such as voice therapy are also long term.

If I want to be full time Summer of 2020, when should I plan my initial consultation for FFS, start electrolysis, and begin voice therapy? What else am I missing?

Thanks everyone.

@Dana Thompson

Hi Dana and... Welcome aboard little sister!!! 😀

Congrats on your brave step forward towards making your life one that finally reflects the truth you have carried inside for a lifetime!!! You have amazing things ahead...

As far as HRT period before FFS... you may want to give the hormones time to work their magic but, also... I know after waiting a lifetime... you want to get the show on the road!!!  ( I consulted around the 9 month mark and had my first 11.5 hour procedure at the one year mark)

I don't know your areas of concern since I haven't seen your face... HRT will round things out a bit but, if you have areas where you want bone work... brow bone, chin, jaw tapering etc... nothing wrong with consulting now... I recommend the FFS book by Dr Ousterhout... it is a great way to familiarize yourself with the different procedures so you can ask informed questions at your consult!!!... I have had many of the procedures in the book so feel free to PM me if you have any questions from a patients experience!

All good things to you on the road ahead!!!


Onward we go brave girl

Ashley 🙋‍♀️💕🌻

I don't know about FFS, voice therapy and hair removal though... I would say start yesterday. Yep, yesterday is about right. Seriously, the sooner the better for transition. With your timeframe it might make things difficult for you. It is possible after that long on hormones that you can't hide it anyway so I would say start right away. It is not possible to predict what hormones will do for each individual, hair removal and voice are sooooooo important though so waiting really has no plus side.

Quote from: IAmM on January 20, 2019, 05:14:23 PM
I don't know about FFS, voice therapy and hair removal though... I would say start yesterday. Yep, yesterday is about right. Seriously, the sooner the better for transition. With your timeframe it might make things difficult for you. It is possible after that long on hormones that you can't hide it anyway so I would say start right away. It is not possible to predict what hormones will do for each individual, hair removal and voice are sooooooo important though so waiting really has no plus side.

Yup!... Yesterday!!!! 😀👍

I agree about electrolysis and voice therapy: start yesterday! 

There is no one roadmap to transition.  You might not need every procedure that is available.  If you decide that you want them, you might want them sooner or later.  It's all up to you.

I went full-time three months after starting HRT.  It is nearly two years later, and I still have not had any surgeries.  I plan to have GRS, but not VFS or FFS.  It all comes down to your priorities.

If you are considering FFS, I would recommend waiting a couple of years to see how your face reponds to HRT.  I have been blown away by how much my face has changed on hormones alone.  Comparing photos side by side, you can tell I am the same person before and after, but when I look in a mirror, I can't see "him" at all.  If you get similar results, you may not need facial surgery at all.

Thank you for the advice! I'll get on the voice and hair removal immediately. I keep being told to be patient, but it's so hard! I feel like I've waited too long already and don't want to see more years pass.

Quote from: Dana Thompson on January 20, 2019, 07:19:43 PM
Thank you for the advice! I'll get on the voice and hair removal immediately. I keep being told to be patient, but it's so hard! I feel like I've waited too long already and don't want to see more years pass.

Dana!...

I know how you feel...When I started, I resolved to do at least one thing each day to get me closer to where I wanted to be... it could be as small as taking time for some skin care, researching procedures etc... or as big as a surgery

You may find, now that your life is finally pointed in the right direction...that each step carries you far... My advice is always to not get to focused on your perceived destination... but, enjoy the lessons, opportunities and liberation in each step... Making your life anew is a wonderful process... enjoy it all... even on the hard days!!!

Onward we go brave little sister!!!

Ashley 🙋‍♀️💕🌻

Dana,


I suggest voice training, hair removal, and working on mannerisms.   
Enjoy the changes and each day as it comes.

Chrissy

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on January 20, 2019, 07:39:43 PM
Dana,


I suggest voice training, hair removal, and working on mannerisms.   
Enjoy the changes and each day as it comes.

Chrissy

Thanks Chrissy!


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Quote from: tgirlamg on January 20, 2019, 07:37:01 PM
Dana!...

I know how you feel...When I started, I resolved to do at least one thing each day to get me closer to where I wanted to be... it could be as small as taking time for some skin care, researching procedures etc... or as big as a surgery

You may find, now that your life is finally pointed in the right direction...that each step carries you far... My advice is always to not get to focused on your perceived destination... but, enjoy the lessons, opportunities and liberation in each step... Making your life anew is a wonderful process... enjoy it all... even on the hard days!!!

Onward we go brave little sister!!!

Ashley [emoji137]‍♀️[emoji177][emoji258]

Great advice, thank you. Btw, you are so pretty!


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Quote from: Dana Thompson on January 20, 2019, 04:35:51 PM
I just came out and started hormones December 7th. I know I have a long ways to go, but I like to plan ahead. I am positive I will need some pretty extensive FFS and I know that can take a long time to go from consultation to procedure. However, I don't know how long I should be on hormones prior to consultation.

I am hoping on coming out at my job and going full time the summer of 2020. Ideally I would get FFS and be full time immediately after recovery. I read the excellent "How I got insurance to pay for FFS" posted by JLT1 and I can see that there will be a lot of time and work required. In addition, other procedures such as electrolysis, and things such as voice therapy are also long term.

If I want to be full time Summer of 2020, when should I plan my initial consultation for FFS, start electrolysis, and begin voice therapy? What else am I missing?

Thanks everyone.

@Dana Thompson
Dear Dana:
I see that you are already receiving numerous replies with good advice from other members here on the Forums, but please permit me to add my comments to the others.

It is certainly great to hear that you have been on HRT for about 1½ months... you have every right to experience excitement and anticipation.
Based on my own experiences...  at ONE to TWO months you might start feeling changes particularly in your nipples and breasts...  soreness, lumps (breast buds) forming under the nipples and in my case my nipples were very erect and sensitive most of the time....  then at 3 to 6 months into  HRT most transitioners will start seeing things happening more significantly and at a quicker rate including possibly changes in body hair growth, your own body and urine smell, changes in erections becoming less intense, libido, etc.

The transition journey is indeed exciting.  As has been stated over and over here on the Forums on various posts, HRT will work uniquely in your own unique body. What you read about other transitioning members experiences with HRT most likely will not be identical to your own experiences.

Some will experience more significant changes more quickly and some will experience less significant changes more slowly....   it is all up to your genes and how your body reacts to the HRT.  The adage that many of us advise to those regarding HRT journeys and how it may work for various individuals is "YMMV"  meaning that Your Mileage May Vary.

Usually not much happens very quickly with HRT, but changes will happen.  PATIENCE is certainly required.

Without a doubt this can be very "EXCITING and SCARY all at the same time."   One needs to hang on for an amazing ride.  Some of my best and most appreciated and dramatic body changes happened to me at about the 5 or 6 month point and through the start of year #2 of my HRT journey.   
Even though I was able to very successfully pass before I went full-time... when I did go full-time at the 1 1/2 year mark I had been passing 100% of the time.  Of course this is just my own personal experience, I suppose I can thank my unique body makeup and my genes for all that.
 
You will not see dramatic changes on a daily or weekly basis.  I found that by taking my photo once a month that when compared with previous monthly photos, the changes were quite noticeable and very motivating.

Thank you for sharing your story with all of us.
Wishing you well, and I will be eagerly following your transition progress toward your goal.
Hugs and hugs,
Danielle

Quote from: Dana Thompson on January 20, 2019, 09:06:34 PM
Great advice, thank you. Btw, you are so pretty!


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Dana!... You are obviously a highly intelligent and discerning new forum member!!!! Lol 😂!!!

Seriously though...Thank you for the kind words and know that you are in a great place here to help you as you continue to move forward!... Transition is a path best traveled with friends at your side... and, you are amongst them here!!!

Onward we go brave sister!!!

Ashley 🙋‍♀️💕🌻

Dana - I am going to put a little different wrinkle on this topic.  Many may disagree with me including yourself but just add my opinion to the mix as you go through this journey.

My plan was exactly the same as yours - but it didn't work out that way.  My expected cash infusion didn't work out and health issues also complicated issues around FFS.  I did learn somethings along the way though so there was a silver lining.

I told my therapist in the first few months that I was going to do FFS and go full time immediately after doing so.  She gave me some push back and I didn't understand why.  She explained to me IN HER OPINION that doing the work in your mind accepting  yourself as being transgender was very important before FFS.  I thought she was nuts.  She continued by explaining over the course of months that many people that transition and wait until after FFS to go public often find themselves worrying if their secret will be found out.  She said that many of her patients are still dealing with their own transphobia and worry what people will think if they found out.

Her advice is to get comfortable with being transgender and then do the surgeries.  In retrospect I agree with her although I never thought I would.  Due to my lack of FFS it was very hard for me out in the world the first 6 months - I felt like everyone was judging me whether they were or were not.

Today I almost couldn't care less.  Maybe a tiny bit once in awhile but hardly ever.  At first I kept a low profile but now I have learned to be comfortable no matter what.  I am feeling much better.  I even colored my hair bright red last week.  No hiding now LMAO !!

I brought it up with my therapist recently and asked what would you think if I had FFS now?  She said oh absolutely - you've done the hard work. She meant the mental work.

I know this probably sounds like a bunch of gobbly dee guk  to you because it did to me when I was where you are.  In retrospect it makes a lot of sense to me.

Just wanted to throw it out there for you or others to consider.
Very best wishes !!

Quote from: KimOct on January 21, 2019, 12:44:21 AM
Dana - I am going to put a little different wrinkle on this topic.  Many may disagree with me including yourself but just add my opinion to the mix as you go through this journey.

My plan was exactly the same as yours - but it didn't work out that way.  My expected cash infusion didn't work out and health issues also complicated issues around FFS.  I did learn somethings along the way though so there was a silver lining.

I told my therapist in the first few months that I was going to do FFS and go full time immediately after doing so.  She gave me some push back and I didn't understand why.  She explained to me IN HER OPINION that doing the work in your mind accepting  yourself as being transgender was very important before FFS.  I thought she was nuts.  She continued by explaining over the course of months that many people that transition and wait until after FFS to go public often find themselves worrying if their secret will be found out.  She said that many of her patients are still dealing with their own transphobia and worry what people will think if they found out.

Her advice is to get comfortable with being transgender and then do the surgeries.  In retrospect I agree with her although I never thought I would.  Due to my lack of FFS it was very hard for me out in the world the first 6 months - I felt like everyone was judging me whether they were or were not.

Today I almost couldn't care less.  Maybe a tiny bit once in awhile but hardly ever.  At first I kept a low profile but now I have learned to be comfortable no matter what.  I am feeling much better.  I even colored my hair bright red last week.  No hiding now LMAO !!

I brought it up with my therapist recently and asked what would you think if I had FFS now?  She said oh absolutely - you've done the hard work. She meant the mental work.

I know this probably sounds like a bunch of gobbly dee guk  to you because it did to me when I was where you are.  In retrospect it makes a lot of sense to me.

Just wanted to throw it out there for you or others to consider.
Very best wishes !!

That's a really interesting perspective and I don't necessarily disagree. I'm going to have to give that more thought. I do think you look very passable in your picture though.


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Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on January 21, 2019, 12:19:39 AM
@Dana Thompson
Dear Dana:
I see that you are already receiving numerous replies with good advice from other members here on the Forums, but please permit me to add my comments to the others.

It is certainly great to hear that you have been on HRT for about 1½ months... you have every right to experience excitement and anticipation.
Based on my own experiences...  at ONE to TWO months you might start feeling changes particularly in your nipples and breasts...  soreness, lumps (breast buds) forming under the nipples and in my case my nipples were very erect and sensitive most of the time....  then at 3 to 6 months into  HRT most transitioners will start seeing things happening more significantly and at a quicker rate including possibly changes in body hair growth, your own body and urine smell, changes in erections becoming less intense, libido, etc.

The transition journey is indeed exciting.  As has been stated over and over here on the Forums on various posts, HRT will work uniquely in your own unique body. What you read about other transitioning members experiences with HRT most likely will not be identical to your own experiences.

Some will experience more significant changes more quickly and some will experience less significant changes more slowly....   it is all up to your genes and how your body reacts to the HRT.  The adage that many of us advise to those regarding HRT journeys and how it may work for various individuals is "YMMV"  meaning that Your Mileage May Vary.

Usually not much happens very quickly with HRT, but changes will happen.  PATIENCE is certainly required.

Without a doubt this can be very "EXCITING and SCARY all at the same time."   One needs to hang on for an amazing ride.  Some of my best and most appreciated and dramatic body changes happened to me at about the 5 or 6 month point and through the start of year #2 of my HRT journey.   
Even though I was able to very successfully pass before I went full-time... when I did go full-time at the 1 1/2 year mark I had been passing 100% of the time.  Of course this is just my own personal experience, I suppose I can thank my unique body makeup and my genes for all that.
 
You will not see dramatic changes on a daily or weekly basis.  I found that by taking my photo once a month that when compared with previous monthly photos, the changes were quite noticeable and very motivating.

Thank you for sharing your story with all of us.
Wishing you well, and I will be eagerly following your transition progress toward your goal.
Hugs and hugs,
Danielle

I've been taking my measurements every Friday (bust, waist, hips, shoulders, weight) and charting them on a spreadsheet. I've seen some minor breast growth already and am experiencing definite soreness. Though the soreness receded after a week or so, it's still there but a lot less so that has me worried.

I haven't really been taking pictures, I kind of hate looking at myself long enough to do so. I don't mind my body so much because I am working on that, but I really dislike looking at my face. I will do it and compare the difference. It's good advice, thank you.


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Dana - I was reading your comment about hating your face and it resonated with me.  I hate my face too.  But I have been at this for almost 3 years and I hate it less than I used to.  There are many reasons that I feel better than I used to and this reply would go on for pages if I explained all the pieces of my mental and emotional evolution.

The short version is that who we are is not about our face or body it is our heart, soul and mind.  Women come in many shapes, sizes and appearances whether they are genetic women or trans- women.  Take an unattractive genetic woman for example is she any less of a woman than a gorgeous one?  Of course not.

Also gender is a societal concept ( getting to a different thought level here ) anyway...  gender is a societal concept - how we live, act, dress etc.  Our genitalia or our face do not define us as people.

Don't get me wrong ... this is tough stuff to integrate into our minds.  We have spent a lifetime being conditioned by everything around us - people - media - etc etc that this is how men are accepted and this is how women are accepted.  It is tough to recondition our perspectives.

I am well down the road but I am not completely there yet myself.

Probably a lot to throw at you this early in your journey but your thoughts previously in this thread made me feel the need to put these concepts out there to you and others.
Best
Kim

Congratulations on taking a first step. I came out August 10 then two days later at work. It has been awesome. Started hrt a week later. Five months on hormones starting to get real breast growth and noticing changes. I have seen it recommended not to have any kind of ffs for at least a year or two but don't see anything wrong with consulting a surgeon now.  Some procedures may not be affected by hormones.  I work as a nurse care coordinator for the Army and have been fully out since August

Quote from: KimOct on January 21, 2019, 04:01:09 PM
Dana - I was reading your comment about hating your face and it resonated with me.  I hate my face too.  But I have been at this for almost 3 years and I hate it less than I used to.  There are many reasons that I feel better than I used to and this reply would go on for pages if I explained all the pieces of my mental and emotional evolution.

The short version is that who we are is not about our face or body it is our heart, soul and mind.  Women come in many shapes, sizes and appearances whether they are genetic women or trans- women.  Take an unattractive genetic woman for example is she any less of a woman than a gorgeous one?  Of course not.

Also gender is a societal concept ( getting to a different thought level here ) anyway...  gender is a societal concept - how we live, act, dress etc.  Our genitalia or our face do not define us as people.

Don't get me wrong ... this is tough stuff to integrate into our minds.  We have spent a lifetime being conditioned by everything around us - people - media - etc etc that this is how men are accepted and this is how women are accepted.  It is tough to recondition our perspectives.

I am well down the road but I am not completely there yet myself.

Probably a lot to throw at you this early in your journey but your thoughts previously in this thread made me feel the need to put these concepts out there to you and others.
Best
Kim

@KimOct

Wise words from a wise and beautiful woman!!!


Love Ya Kim!!!

Sis 🙋‍♀️💕🌸

Thanks Ashley love you too   

Dana -  I'm temporarily hijacking your topic but with a purpose.  Ashley was my first transgender mentor.  She was an enormous help to me when I began this journey and remains a friend.  The reason I single her out is that we have walked this path in different ways.

Ashley has had many surgeries and looks amazing.  Additionally she works very hard to keep herself in shape with exercise and lives a very healthy life.  On the other hand I could lose some weight and have not had any FFS or BA.

What we share though is how we view this life and this experience.  Moving forward with any surgeries is certainly a good thing and can lead to happiness.  Also you can feel like your body 'fits'.  Ashley once told me that her body is a vessel to live this life and she chose how to shape it.  That is a great way to look at it.

Here is where the rubber hits the road.  FFS should not be so you can 'hide' being transgender IMHO.  It should be to make you feel good about your 'vessel' as Ashley put it.  Wanting to hide that you are transgender is - IMHO - because you have not accepted yourself as being transgender.

My point regarding FFS is to do it for emotionally healthy reasons.  Not to hide. 

Ashley can easily pass - she is beautiful.  I pass sometimes but many times I don't but it really shouldn't matter.  Being OK with who you are is what matters.  Even though Ashley passes she does not hide being transgender.  She doesn't walk around wearing a sign but she interacts regularly with the public.  ( I will skip details to respect her privacy ) 

But to conclude my point - FFS is to make you feel good but not to help you hide.  You shouldn't want to hide if it is because you are embarrassed about who you are because there is nothing to be embarrassed about and if anyone is then I direct them to my signature line.

Quote from: KimOct on January 21, 2019, 04:01:09 PM
Dana - I was reading your comment about hating your face and it resonated with me.  I hate my face too.  But I have been at this for almost 3 years and I hate it less than I used to.  There are many reasons that I feel better than I used to and this reply would go on for pages if I explained all the pieces of my mental and emotional evolution.

The short version is that who we are is not about our face or body it is our heart, soul and mind.  Women come in many shapes, sizes and appearances whether they are genetic women or trans- women.  Take an unattractive genetic woman for example is she any less of a woman than a gorgeous one?  Of course not.

Also gender is a societal concept ( getting to a different thought level here ) anyway...  gender is a societal concept - how we live, act, dress etc.  Our genitalia or our face do not define us as people.

Don't get me wrong ... this is tough stuff to integrate into our minds.  We have spent a lifetime being conditioned by everything around us - people - media - etc etc that this is how men are accepted and this is how women are accepted.  It is tough to recondition our perspectives.

I am well down the road but I am not completely there yet myself.

Probably a lot to throw at you this early in your journey but your thoughts previously in this thread made me feel the need to put these concepts out there to you and others.
Best
Kim

Thanks Kim. I accept that gender is a societal concept, but that doesn't change how I feel about what I see in the mirror. In fact, I think part of being transgender for me is that how I am perceived and how I act within societal strictures does not match who I am.

I need to work on self love, I know. I am happy to hear that you are feeling better about your face then before.


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