okay so my mom is taking me to a therapist and I'm not sure if they have TS experience. I think they do have TS experience because my doctor said that she will find out about TS counseling.

Anyway I have questions

1) What do they mostly ask in the first session? Do they first ask about your life's story and about things throughout your life?

2) how hard is it to convince make a therapist feel sure that you are indeed transgender? What do they look for?

3) If I took HRT for 6 months through self-medication and stopped because family caught me: Do they ask me how I felt on HRT as an assessment? Like if I took HRT and had the guts to self med would they feel more assured that perhaps I'm ready for HRT. Lets say that I tell them I'm taking HRT right now would they feel more comfortable giving me a letter? would they feel more assured that I'm transgender?

4) What type of questions do they ask you? How do they try to test you to make sure your transgender? Do they play mind games with you to see your mentality? Do they accuse you of not being transgender if you didn't play with barbie dolls or do stereotypical girl things at a young age? Like let's say you started to feel yourself as TS when you were 14? I liked video games for example- don't anymore but do they test you by saying "well explain why you liked video games, seems a little odd"

Any other tips are welcomed


thanks

Tanya Helloooooooooo,

I do not know where you are but I feel an affinity with you.

I recently attended my first appointment with a Psychiatrist at a specialist gender clinic in London.

Quote 1) What do they mostly ask in the first session? Do they first ask about your life's story and about things throughout your life?

Yes, they will. Essential background in order to avoid a very serious mistake.


Quote 2) how hard is it to convince make a therapist feel sure that you are indeed transgender? What do they look for?

Best not try to hoodwink him/her. They are professional medics, are you?  If you are a genine TS, they will see it in you during the consultations etc.

3) If I took HRT for 6 months through self-medication and stopped because family caught me: Do they ask me how I felt on HRT as an assessment? Like if I took HRT and had the guts to self med would they feel more assured that perhaps I'm ready for HRT. Lets say that I tell them I'm taking HRT right now would they feel more comfortable giving me a letter? would they feel more assured that I'm transgender?

In my experience, past indulgiences with hormones count for little. However, if you expect to be tested for hormone levels by way of a blood sample, stop intake asap, so that the results show no unusual levels for your usual gender.


4) What type of questions do they ask you? How do they try to test you to make sure your transgender? Do they play mind games with you to see your mentality? Do they accuse you of not being transgender if you didn't play with barbie dolls or do stereotypical girl things at a young age? Like let's say you started to feel yourself as TS when you were 14? I liked video games for example- don't anymore but do they test you by saying "well explain why you liked video games, seems a little odd"


Transgender is in your mind, no mind games, if you are female in mind, they will know it by being with you. Equally if you are M to F. My first experience at a gender clinic was the most comforting day of my life. The doctor was most kind and threw a comforting blanket over my shoulders. They are not inquisitors unless you are trying to decieve them. If you are? then God help your soul because they are merciless.


Any other tips are welcomed

Hey, Dress as comfortable as you feel, do not be dictated by gender or fashion. Your interview will go betrer if you are not constantly bothered by what you are wearing etc , and the possible opinions of your interrorgator. Like video gammes? I like aviation flight simulators. Always had an interest in aviation, being female or male is irrelevent.

Okay so basically they aren't their to hassle you one bit. you just be yourself and act they way you do? In otherwords you have to get a close connection with them in order for them to find out if your really TS.

I don't think one session will determine it all since like a first date where you start off with a intro and then start being more comfortable with each other...

not trying to decieve anyone...I had some of these obessions of wearing girl clothes, cutting off my privates, etc since about 11

I am going to be as honest and sincere as possible to the therapist.


About HRT, I heard that some therapist do use it as a test

Quote from: Tanya1 on April 09, 2008, 06:47:14 PM
Okay so basically they aren't their to hassle you one bit. you just be yourself and act they way you do? In otherwords you have to get a close connection with them in order for them to find out if your really TS.

I don't think one session will determine it all since like a first date where you start off with a intro and then start being more comfortable with each other...

not trying to decieve anyone...I had some of these obessions of wearing girl clothes, cutting off my privates, etc since about 11

I am going to be as honest and sincere as possible to the therapist.


About HRT, I heard that some therapist do use it as a test

That just about covers it. Be yourself, they will help you if you are honest, they will find your faults if you decieve them. You know who you are so why deny it to your betters? 

Hi Tanya,

If this is  a new therapist for you then it is very reasonable for you to ask how much experience he/she has with transgendered people. As you read the posts at this site you will find many people who encounter therapists who really don't have any experience in this area. So be sure to ask. Once you have the answer to that you might have a better feel for how much you want to tell this person.

i'll second or third the experience thing, i want somebody with experience and every counselor around where i live seems to lack it. anyone with experince is at least 2 and a half hours away for me and then i have to find someone to watch my kids....it's a trick bag get somebody with experience, if they don't have i would run.....



Best Wishes
Princess Mickie

Just to echo a bit what others said, beware of trying to outguess or "please" the therapist. Try to just focus on being open and honest, and let the chips fall as they may. Remember that a good therapist will help YOU figure out who you are and what you need to do. They're there for you, at YOUR disposal, being paid by you. Use the therapist as a tool to bounce ideas off of, and as someone you can share bottled-up feelings with without fear of judgement. Just being able to do THAT, to get all that stuff OUT THERE so you don't have to carry it alone... is a wonderful feeling.

It's true some can have a "Gatekeeper" mentality, but most will tell you that GID is a self-diagnosed problem really. In the end, only YOU know how you feel. It's not so much about adding up "feminine traits" as it is making sure YOU'RE sure about what you need, and being realistic with your expectations. There are no "tests" or ways to prove one has GID. And self-medicating... aside from being incredibly dangerous, using it to blackmail a therapist for an HRT letter probably isn't the best idea, lol.

And yes, I'm sure you'll be asked to talk about your life and history, but don't think of it all as an interrogation, mind games, or a test. It's just a chance to get a dialogue going, a back-and-forth so you can get to know one another. Most therapists will tell you that establishing TRUST between the two of you is the most important thing of all.

~Kate~

Quote from: Tanya1 on April 09, 2008, 04:14:36 PM
okay so my mom is taking me to a therapist and I'm not sure if they have TS experience. I think they do have TS experience because my doctor said that she will find out about TS counseling.

Anyway I have questions

1) What do they mostly ask in the first session? Do they first ask about your life's story and about things throughout your life?

2) how hard is it to convince make a therapist feel sure that you are indeed transgender? What do they look for?

3) If I took HRT for 6 months through self-medication and stopped because family caught me: Do they ask me how I felt on HRT as an assessment? Like if I took HRT and had the guts to self med would they feel more assured that perhaps I'm ready for HRT. Lets say that I tell them I'm taking HRT right now would they feel more comfortable giving me a letter? would they feel more assured that I'm transgender?

4) What type of questions do they ask you? How do they try to test you to make sure your transgender? Do they play mind games with you to see your mentality? Do they accuse you of not being transgender if you didn't play with barbie dolls or do stereotypical girl things at a young age? Like let's say you started to feel yourself as TS when you were 14? I liked video games for example- don't anymore but do they test you by saying "well explain why you liked video games, seems a little odd"

Any other tips are welcomed


thanks

Hi Tanya,

I have to echo what has been said... I would not go into it trying to "prove" you are TS, after
all if you're not, don't you really want to find that out?

But with that said I know I catch myself trying to "prove" myself sometimes and when I
recognize that I'm doing that I actually point it out and, tell her that I'm feeling the need
to "prove" something and we talk about it and why I'm feeling the need to do it.

For me I had some questions if I really was TS, I did not go into it with that in mind though and I
told her I was TS from the start. I did admit later I had some doubts but after talking it became clear that
my concerns were a lack of acceptance than any real doubts. So I know what you are thinking but for
me being totally open and honest helped. The bottom line was I was transitioning whether she approved or
not and that's a powerful thing.

Amanda

I've never done it, but its my understanding that it works best, if at all, when you tell the absolute truth.

wow kate and amanda have helped me a lot in understanding about Therapy. Lies just back fire...
So therapist can't really tell if your TS but perhaps try to clear your mind and decide for yourself it you think you are TS after guiding you about to learn your identity?

But I have a question , does GID go away by body building and trying to suppress by like acting proud? I honestly thought I had a messed up mind throughout my teens because of always having an urge to wear panties, shaving my legs, nail polish and so forth. it would to away but then come back. I tried to cut my penis when I was 11 but failed and didn't have the guts to pull it off. It was like a pattern througout my life... I would do it then tried to stop it but it came back. Then at 14 I finally heard someone mention something about estrogen and what it achieves in my men. the guy was taking medical school and ignorantly said that "gay" people take it. I asked him the spelling because I was secretly interested in getting a hold of this. kind of odd if I ask the spelling.. LOL I searched the heck out of estrogen and finally came to find out what was a transgender....

I don't wear girl clothes right now b/c I hate my body and I feel like a guy in a dress.

I think self medication can be dangerous, don't disagree.

ps I might not go to the therapist.., see my post in "just for us"

like thay've all told me, you seriously need to go to the therapist, they can only help you with what you need, ts is not some disease like chicken pox, you can get a vaccine for and it all goes away, you can hide, but it will always come back.


Best Wishes,
Mickie
The New Warrior Princess

Quote from: Tanya1 on April 10, 2008, 03:31:36 PM
So therapist can't really tell if your TS but perhaps try to clear your mind and decide for yourself it you think you are TS after guiding you about to learn your identity?

Well, the catch is that if you do want HRT and SRS letters, they DO have to medically diagnose you with GID. But IMHO, it's still not a good idea to rely on them to tell you who you are. They need to do that so the doctor's can cover themselves legally, but YOU need to be totally honest with yourself about what you need to do.

QuoteBut I have a question , does GID go away by body building and trying to suppress by like acting proud?

Not from what I've read here. You might distract yourself for a bit, but it's ONLY a distraction - the underlying "problem" seems to be a life-long condition (unless you're TS and transition).

QuoteI honestly thought I had a messed up mind throughout my teens because of always having an urge to wear panties, shaving my legs, nail polish and so forth.

Keep in mind that those impulses are symptoms of all sorts of GID variations. For what it's worth, I didn't have those urges... and yet I still had to transition. My point being that those sorts of things are clues to figuring yourself out, but don't RELY on them.

QuoteI don't wear girl clothes right now b/c I hate my body and I feel like a guy in a dress.

I know the feeling. I tried it at times during my 30s while trying to pass... but it always ended up making me feel WORSE, since it just showed me how far I was from who I needed to be.

Quoteps I might not go to the therapist.., see my post in "just for us"

I just saw that... but I agree with others who say you may not have anything to lose by trying it?

~Kate~

QuoteSo therapist can't really tell if your TS but perhaps try to clear your mind and decide for yourself it you think you are TS after guiding you about to learn your identity?

TS is really self diagnosed and yes they are just there to help you.

QuoteBut I have a question , does GID go away by body building and trying to suppress by like acting proud?

All you are doing is denying it... GID at least in my case never went away and I think for most it will come back. I would
guess between 35 and 45 is when it hits most of us if we try to ignore it when we are younger.

I know what you are saying, I went through all that, body building, I can't be female, I have a girlfriend, all
weight lifting did is made me hate my body worse.

Quote
I honestly thought I had a messed up mind throughout my teens because of always having an urge to wear panties, shaving my legs, nail polish and so forth. it would to away but then come back. I tried to cut my penis when I was 11 but failed and didn't have the guts to pull it off. It was like a pattern througout my life... I would do it then tried to stop it but it came back. Then at 14 I finally heard someone mention something about estrogen and what it achieves in my men. the guy was taking medical school and ignorantly said that "gay" people take it. I asked him the spelling because I was secretly interested in getting a hold of this. kind of odd if I ask the spelling.. LOL I searched the heck out of estrogen and finally came to find out what was a transgender....

omg... you need your boy parts for SRS DO NOT try to cut it off lol

Quote
I don't wear girl clothes right now b/c I hate my body and I feel like a guy in a dress.

yea me too... and a dress is not my style anyway

Quote
I think self medication can be dangerous, don't disagree.

You have to do what is right for you and for some DIY is the only option, but everyone here
will tell you to see a doctor.

Amanda

The reason that you're seeing a therapist, is because you have issues that you're dealing with, and you could benefit from the help that a trained professional can offer. You would want to visit with a trained therapist, who as everyone else has pointed out, is a trained specialist in trans gender issues. To be anything less than honest works against you. The therapist is there to help you, and you'd only be hurting yourself if the therapist doesn't truly know who you are. Many specialists do not want to be seen as "gatekeepers," and understand that the SOC are intended as guidelines only, not the law written in stone.

"Trans gender" is an umbrella term for many different "gender variant" individuals. Not all wish to alter their bodies. Not all are TS. Some people are trans gender, and are able to express their unique gender awareness in a way that satisfies them without the need for hormones. A therapist will work with you by asking questions, and giving you a forum to discuss whatever is on your mind. The therapist will be able to help you find where you feel comfortable on the very broad trans gender spectrum, and to find self acceptance. A therapist can also help you find others in the trans gender community to compare yourself with, as a way of identifying yourself, and establishing a social life with the community. A therapist can also help with relationships, which can be difficult for anyone, more so for anyone dealing with cross-gendered feelings.

This all starts with the development of a truthful and trusting relationship with a gender-specific therapist, who has the training and sensitivity to help you on your journey. Many people have found great comfort from their therapy sessions, myself included. I sincerely hope that you're able to find the help that you're looking for

okay thanks Kate! you helped out. I guess I will go to the therapist but I'm not expecting anything to happen since even if I get letters, my mom will interfere and throw me out.I will probably tell the therapist to give me the letters once I'm living on my own. so I'll just go to therapy to see if I trans and for help. So GID is basically something only you can know and the legal aspect of it is to prevent the doctors from being sued...

Amanda, LOL, I'm happy i didn't cut off my parts b/c it can kill you easily... I actaully like 1 year back thought about trying it

April thanks , i will be honest!