My huge internal conflict with my internal femininity was slowly destroying my life.
I denied and over compensated, yearned and felt so unfulfilled. The stress came out in excercise and an edgy personality.
I came to peace with being TG over time with research, and the posting on "the good things about being TG" at this site helped me to love and forgive myself, but I could not come out. I was stuck and in distress.
My wife and I tried a kink. We "played" with male chastity, and she began to entice me into a submissive personal identity in our relationship. She gave me a journal and she insisted I write for her about my feelings and what I was going through.
The stress of enforced chastity brings up your desires, while guiding you into submission to your partner. The journal becomes your outlet ... read at your partner's leisure as a guide into your deepest thoughts and desires. She made a rule that my requests be in the journal and not spoken of to her. That gave her the time to take each in, and to decide if it were to be indulged or ignored, if it were to illicit a written teasing or understanding response from her, or be ignored.
This become quickly a form of teasing interrogation, and confession, of pensive revelation and acceptance. Unspeakable secrets were teased out, in written form hidden in some quiet corner, while I was in one of my most desprite moments. The key to another's heart is in getting them to reveal their vulnerabilities. It is also I learned in openness and acceptance.
I felt just a hint of what I was getting into as we began. I had no idea of the power, and of her reaction to it.
I'm totally open with her and testing the waters in the outside world. She has a say in my feminization and it gives me butterflies at times knowing I've lost the ability to repress it. This is happening, and she loves and expects to see my softer side now.
Did D&S play help break down your barriers?
Lauren in love
