I haven't been active on this site since late December, and enough has changed I figured I might as well just start my own thread to document things, rather than reviving dead threads.

I guess first and foremost, I believe I have officially entered the "transition" part of my life. Around the beginning of the year, I shaved off the beard for the first time in three and a half years. more than trying to get closer to femininity, it was a sort of declaration of intent to myself. I'd spent years hiding behind that beard, and now I was face to face with myself in the truest way possible. I'm in the process of building a new wardrobe, which has been a lot more fun than I ever anticipated. However I'm still cursed with a bad hairline and a face that's reminiscent of a foot, so I've got a lot of work to do before I'll be happy with my appearance.

Next big thing, I've started the drawn-out process of trying to get to HRT. Because of my insurance's regulations, I have to jump through and endless barrage of hoops to get anywhere. I've met with the primary care doc and did the first round of blood work. But she wouldn't let me advance toward hormones until I saw a urologist about a long existing kidney stone. Now that I've worked through that, I've finally been given the green light to meet with Behavioral Health to get a referral/approval for HRT. Still waiting on them to call me to schedule that meeting, though. Then once past that, I'll meet with an endocrinologist finally. So while it's still a long ways away, the pieces are at least in motion at last.

And the last big thing as of late. I came out to my mother last month. It was something I dreaded for weeks, and even in the moments leading up to it I was a trembling, anxious mess. But she was more accepting than I ever could've imagined. She didn't ask any weird questions, didn't seem shocked. She even asked me for some resources so she could educate herself. Being out to her has been one of the greatest things in my life; I can now have fully honest and candid discussions with her about it without fear.

So that's where I'm at now. I'm still stuck at a job I hate with several very vocally transphobic coworkers, so at the moment finding a new job is pretty much the top of the list. Which is difficult, being in SoCal with god awful rent prices and with my insurance's nonsense, I need a constant flow of income just to afford food. But it is what it is; just another piece of the ongoing battle.

I'll try not to be absent for another five month streak, but no promises. I'm about as antisocial online as I am in person.

Hi, Cassie.  Good to hear from you.

I understand the frustration of having to deal with all the procedures and waiting times.  Still, you have started the process.  It is a long journey, but if you keep on putting one foot in front of the other, you will get there.

Congratulations on coming out to your mother!  That is so nice that she is understanding.  Somehow, mothers know us better than we think.  I suspect if my mother had lived to hear my coming out, she would not have been surprised either.

Good luck with finding a new job!

Finally got the call today from behavioral health. I've got an appointment exactly one month from today (the 11th). Going to be a two hour appointment, in case I wasn't intimidated enough. Can't say I've ever been excited for a psych eval before, so this is already interesting territory here.

I've got one month to psych myself out,as I always do. This is a huge step, and honestly the gravity of it didn't really hit me until I got the call.

Quote from: cassiebythesea on May 11, 2019, 01:37:30 AM
Finally got the call today from behavioral health. I've got an appointment exactly one month from today (the 11th). Going to be a two hour appointment, in case I wasn't intimidated enough. Can't say I've ever been excited for a psych eval before, so this is already interesting territory here.

I've got one month to psych myself out,as I always do. This is a huge step, and honestly the gravity of it didn't really hit me until I got the call.

Congratulations on your determination and your progress. Main thing is you don't have to do anything you don't want too. I hope your psych evaluation is a breeze for you and you get the outcome you are looking for. Congrats on coming out to you Mum...that can be quite daunting and her response was pretty good from your description. You may well find things are a little easier for you since you have started the process

Take care

Liz

Hi Cassie,

Good luck with your Psych Eval.  Now that it is "real," there are lots of stuff that could be done as part of your transition that don't require the approval of doctors or insurance companies.

Have you read Cosmo or Bustle?  Most women have seen one or the other.  You ought to have some idea of what is in them if you want to eventually blend in.

Marion

Good Morning Cassie, nice to read your update here  Congrats on coming out to your Mom and having her support, that's truly wonderful. As my friends above mentioned it's a long road to navigate, think long term planning (years) for a transition. I'll be watching this thread as you progress. I am originally from So Cal, we left some 35 years ago, because the cost of housing was expensive then, I can't imagine what it's like there now. Good luck with finding a new job too, the job market seems to be in pretty good shape overall, so you have favorable winds blowing there (for the moment).

Cheers

Cynthia -

Cassie, welcome to SP and transition. I'm originally from Orange County CA and left in 2007, best decision I've made in a long time. I was in your shoes also with work, left a 100K+ job where my co-workers were not supportive of transition. I feel the pains of income loss but I couldn't be happier. We make life adjustments to become the women we were meant to become. I agree clothes are super fun! Assembling a wardrobe is one of my favorite past times!

Congratulations on your therapist visit coming up, I felt much relief when I sat down with my Psychologist and let all my past anxieties out. My Therapist wrote my letter to approve me for HRT on the fourth visit, that was around end of January 2019. I started HRT 2-2019 and I'm approaching three months. Hope your journey goes smooth.

New job depends on what you've been doing the last few years vs what's available in your area. I work in healthcare and everyone in my office is 1000% supportive. Several trans women on this site work in a variety of fields, IT seems popular. I think your next line of work is going to depend on you: How much you make a "big" deal out of being transgender vs confidently interviewing for your next position. Some considerations when selecting your next employment venue: consider the level of education and training your co-workers have. Those who have professional degrees and licenses are usually those who have more to lose and less apt to harass colleagues. Also doesn't hurt to apply at companies where they don't discriminate based on gender identity or expression.

Best of luck with your transition. I know it's difficult. Find peace and comfort knowing you are among those walking in your shoes. We support you!

Sophia