Just goes to show what a shambles they are (all of them!!)

So Kay is about to get her state pension and also applied for her NHS pension. The form is lengthy and requests info about me.

One of the items she has to send is birth certificate. Of course this is the only doc still in my old name.

To change it in the UK is odious requiring a diagnosis of GD written by a government listed doctor (which I have) and a second doctor that describes the gender reassignment that has taken place. This has to specify surgery or why surgery has not taken place (i can get). Plus 2 years evidence of living in the gender. After all that a panel decides if one is trans enough to be given a GRC that means you can request a new birth certificate.  Not surprising few people do it including me.

What I didn't realise though was how upsetting it was to see the BC with my deadname ad wrong gender. I burst into tears.

Kay knew however that the BC was not enough and requested my legal change of name. That cheered me up.

I am going to have to get my evidence together and the correctly worded second doctor report...

Jessica xxx

I never changed my birth certificate. The waiting list is now at 18 months. When someone needs to see it (very rarely), I show them that and the Legal Name Change order from the court. Wouldn't that suffice for the pension forms?

I get the long hassle of changing the BC, and that is why I never bothered. But do you need to?
I guess my point is that I had to describe in court why I was changing my name, provide letters, etc. and the court approved the petition. So it is done. No bureaucrat outranks the judge. They have to accept that I have changed my name and I don't need to explain to them why I did it. Talk to the judge. If they say they need proof of who I am, I present government-issued photo IDs that were given using the BC and Name Change Order.

I know things work differently "across the pond". That is why I am asking.

Hugs!

Exactly that LoriDee, the deed poll (legal name change) and the BC is what's required in this case.

It's just because I never use my BC for ID that made it distressing. All my other ID driving licence, passport are all in my name and gender.

Jessica xxx

I understand. I feel the same way if someone requires a birth certificate for some reason.
I can prove I was born because I am standing in front of you. Identification? Here are two government-issued photo IDs, plus my medical cards, and credit cards... how much do you need?

In my mind, once you have photo IDs a BC is irrelevant. It was verified when I got the IDs. *sigh*

I have survived a week working from home, a week where I could not be myself or was I myself?

I am no different a person at home or anywhere else. I am me. It's just clothes. Clothes that I rock in as a woman, so they are for men. Jeans are pretty much the same ( female cut does fit me better) and tops polo or T both hang off my boobs so obviously I am a woman wearing mens clothes.

I do not need the reassurance of wearing women's clothes to know who and what I am. I know.

But next week I am working away again and I will be wearing women's clothes again, and makeup. I will be just the same as any cis-woman. It is my preferred clothing.

However, I am the same person as this week and will be the same person next.

Hugs
Jessica xxx

Quote from: LoriDee on June 07, 2024, 10:48:46 AMI understand. I feel the same way if someone requires a birth certificate for some reason.
I can prove I was born because I am standing in front of you. Identification? Here are two government-issued photo IDs, plus my medical cards, and credit cards... how much do you need?

In my mind, once you have photo IDs a BC is irrelevant. It was verified when I got the IDs. *sigh*

I paid for the birth cert. when I did my name, change. I was, disappointed to receive an amended one saying see page 2, which had my new name and gender. Really not a big deal. I never have had to show it for anything.

This is the type of government we had and will probably still have in the UK. It was specific to the Cass review that has banned all therapies and criminalised medication for under 18's. Plus proposals to change the equalities act to remove pretty much all transgender rights.

From a tweet by Kimi Badenoch about at the time being the Secretary of State for equalities. 

"The third reason was having gender-critical men and women in the UK government, holding the positions that mattered most in Equalities and Health.
 
You only need to look at what the SNP did in Scotland to see what would have happened had we not intervened.
 
The Cass Review would never have been commissioned under a Labour govt. Labour did not want to know.
 
We had incredible opposition from the system on everything. It was when the ministers changed that everything changed."

Context: the Scottish government (SNP) voted for self ID, the British government  vetoed it.
Jessica

Hope you are okay dear, its been 4 weeks since you last posted.

Thank you Davina, I am doing OK

I have logged in for today only. I am leaving Susan's.

For sometime now I have found that even with the update of more friendly T&C's that I am restricted in covering the political subjects of the UK that I hold dear.

I have been very active on ->-bleeped-<- especially r/transgenderUK that is so more relevant to me and the UK than here.

Thank you all for supporting my early days of transition and send good wishes to you all

This will be my finial post.

In the words of the famous saying
"Goodbye and thanks for all the fish"

Jessica xx

Ps my point is made with the removal of the famous media platform beginning with R....

Sorry to hear that, we will miss you.

Dear Jessica,


Merry Christmas!


Chrissy

Hi everyone, I have come back at least for a while, in these dark times to show solidarity for my American friends and the American trans community. Note I will be commenting on political and news but here it will only be personal and anything going on in the UK

My time away has been dramatic and changing for the better.

I have split from my wife Kay, and now living 150 miles away in Corby in the midlands. I have a lovely house even if a little lacking in some furniture.

I can finally live my life 24/7 as the female I always should have been.

[Brief recap for any new members, I was forced not to dress female at home, whereas is was female everywhere else]

I have never been happier. To get up in the morning and have the awful decision as what to wear lol. And to spend my day as me, be it at home or out. I have met neighbours and spent some afternoons chatting over a cup of tea.

Nobody here knows me so I'm just another single woman living alone.

Well, living alone during the week. I now been able to explore my sexuality and have a boyfriend and we spend most weekends together. Never knew I could fall for a guy. I was never Gay and could never have done this without embracing my full womanhood. Girls generally like guys?

I also for the first time have a BF girlfriend to confide in we talk for hours on video calls and see each other once the week at work. Believe it or not but she is only 22 and I 72 but behave more like 22 we have a lot in common.

I need to get up, I hear my boyfriend pottering downstairs so expect breakfast soon.

Love to you all
Jessica

I was only wondering/hoping you were doing okay the other day, good to hear you are back on track. Boyfriend hay!! living the life now. I take it you have given up work now. Hugs and XXXXs

No Davina, I am still working. They carry me out in a box.

I am much closer to you now I have moved, maybe we can meet up sometime

Forgot to add I have had my ears pierced first time ever!!

Jessica

Welcome back Jessica! Glad to hear you're doing well.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

Welcome back, Jessica.

I can sense your happiness shining through. I am so happy for you!

@Jessica_K
Dear Jessica:
  WOWzers ...  you have returned.  I am so very glad to see and to read your latest postings
with your updates regarding your life events and current plans.

Please continue posting and updating me and the rest of your avid followers as you feel comfortable sharing.

Many HUGS and wishing you happiness in your life.❤️❤️❤️
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

Hi Jessica

Yeah what Danielle said; "Wowzers"

It's so nice to see you back after such a long time.  I often wondered why you was not posting as regularly as you did and a couple of times I checked to see when you last logged in.  Only to find the months you were gone were growning.

I wondered how you was going and lo and behold you were back and when I read your posts and the couple before that I then realized that you had said; "Goodbye".  I also sense a peace, joy and contentment in your posts in how wonderful your life is now.  You deserve it and I'm so happy that you are now at peace with yourself.

Take care let us know what is happening in Sunny England and all the best for the future

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Jessica_K

Yes if you are ever passing close to Worcester we could meet up, first thing I did was get my ears done.