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Allie's Blog IV: Revenge of Allie's Blog

Started by imallie, January 03, 2024, 08:53:54 PM

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Oldandcreaky

QuoteThe thing I mentioned to my wife that we've yet to experience is the unexpected encounter - running into someone we know who doesn't know.

Minute by minute, ^this^ is less and less likely to happen as people will talk and talk about your shift.

For me, the ultimate response upon hearing such news would be a shrug and, "I hope she's doing she well. I haven't seen her in too long. I hope we meet up soon."
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Moonflower

Thanks for sharing your trip with us!

Quote from: imallie on June 05, 2024, 11:48:11 PMI will start by seeing what options are available makeup-wise when I try the free Sephora consult.

My wife paid for a makeup "lesson" at Ulta. We didn't retain anything useful or buy any of the recommended products. She wound up looking like a deliberately feminized dramatic drag queen in stage makeup with sharp angles instead of her soft, subtle self. What a surprise!

Who can get the free consult? How?
:icon_wave:
1999 we met and married :icon_archery:
Fall 2018 The woman hiding behind my husband's facade is coming out full time! :icon_female:
She began MTF HRT but had adverse reactions, so gave up on transitioning medically.
Summer 2022 I went through gender confirmation surgery as a result of cancer.
2024 my wife submitted letters approving of medically transitioning, she's legally changing her name and gender on all of her and our documents and accounts.
January 2025!  SURGERY!

Welcome, to Significant Others
https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247396.0.html

Our transitioning blog, "Opening The Cage"
https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,241591.0.html

BlueSky @weavinggrace.bsky.social
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Lori Dee

Quote from: Moonflower on June 08, 2024, 07:20:26 AMMy wife paid for a makeup "lesson" at Ulta. We didn't retain anything useful or buy any of the recommended products. She wound up looking like a deliberately feminized dramatic drag queen in stage makeup with sharp angles instead of her soft, subtle self. What a surprise!

I have never done it, but I have seen others with that experience. When selling scented candles and jewelry at various craft events, a Mary Kay rep did free makeup sessions. I think she wears every product she sells. Not a good look.

I study the faces of professional models in photos. If I think they look pretty, I study how they did it. Where is the eyeliner, what shade of shadow, lipstick, etc? These people have professionals doing their makeup, so I try to learn from them. Then I experiment to see how it looks on me.
My Life is Based on a True Story
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete
  • skype:.?call
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imallie

Quote from: Moonflower on June 08, 2024, 07:20:26 AMThanks for sharing your trip with us!

My wife paid for a makeup "lesson" at Ulta. We didn't retain anything useful or buy any of the recommended products. She wound up looking like a deliberately feminized dramatic drag queen in stage makeup with sharp angles instead of her soft, subtle self. What a surprise!

Who can get the free consult? How?

Sorry I misspoke. I think the Sephora one is $45, but they give you a bunch of free samples and it's "supposedly" a lot better than Ulta? But I suspect that is very much dependent on individual stores and even individual consultants you get. So it's a bit of rolling the dice. Sorry it didn't work out for your hubby! 😘

The Sephora one is specifically called "everyday" makeup and there are more dramatic versions you can sign up for. Plus they are famously trans friendly.  Even so, as said, I know it's rolling the dice. But really what's $45? Worth the experience if nothing else.  And if the result is ridiculous my wife and I will have a laugh and move on. 😂
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Gina P

Sounds like a lot of fun getting a make over. Getting your ears pierced will be nice. Be sure and leave them in for as long as they tell you. I took mine out to soon for a night and had a terrible time reinserting them. I finally had my wife just force them in. A little blood and a bit painful. I would save you that experience.
  • skype:Gina P?call
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imallie

Quote from: Gina P on June 08, 2024, 10:46:24 AMSounds like a lot of fun getting a make over. Getting your ears pierced will be nice. Be sure and leave them in for as long as they tell you. I took mine out to soon for a night and had a terrible time reinserting them. I finally had my wife just force them in. A little blood and a bit painful. I would save you that experience.

Thanks Gina! For me, it's not as much about getting a makeover (the "lipstick on a pig" idiom comes to mind...) but more just learning some basic technics and having a professional show me the kinds of things I should be aiming for.

But yes, I do hope to get the ears done soon. Just wore clip-ons to lunch and they're sore! I took them off and will put
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imallie

So lunch at our Pho place was great.

Got seated by one of the regulars... she saw my wife and I don't think she really noticed me behind her so just seated us.

When she came over to the table, she normally says "the usual for you two?" This time, she looked at my wife and said "the usual for you?" And then she looked at me and it slowly started to dawn on her and I just smiled and said "the usual for me too."

When the food came, another server brought it out... and brought my normal order and gave it to my wife. My wife smiled and said "nope, other way".. and she looked confused and said "oh yeah, I think he used to have this one." And she walked away.  So we laughed figuring that she actually didn't notice. But I really don't think she got much of a look at me other than behind, so it was just hair. 

The nice thing was, the first server, who seated us and took our orders, later came back to the table to check on us. She said "I forgot to tell you earlier, I really like your hair - it looks really great on you!"

It was really nice of her to say that.

Plus, as usual, the Pho was delicious... and using a headband kept my hair from taking a swim. So, win-win!

Love,
Allie
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davina61

Your getting the hang of it dear!!
a long time coming (out) HRT 12 2017
GRS 2021 5th Nov

Jill of all trades mistress of non
Know a bit about everything but not enough to be clever
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imallie

Quote from: davina61 on June 08, 2024, 03:25:59 PMYour getting the hang of it dear!!

It's really funny. Once hair connected with head that was it. No turning back.

Vacation came at a fortuitous time, to make us conscious of what we were doing, I suppose? But in truth I think we'd already gotten there mentally.

Obviously lots of work to do on all sorts of fronts to clean things up and keep getting better and better... but that's no different than any other project. Can't let perfection (or in this case, competence!) be the enemy of progress.

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Moonflower

Quote from: LoriDee on June 08, 2024, 09:10:41 AMa Mary Kay rep did free makeup sessions.

You remind me: I didn't use products like Mary Kay's, but (decades ago) someone whom I wanted to be friends with invited me to her Mary Kay "party". I was the only one who attended. So sad. She had decorated and baked and prepared goody bags. We had a nice visit. She explained that since she wasn't a licensed cosmetologist, she couldn't apply any products to my skin. She gave me sales pitches on several products, and offered me samples, but I don't think I tried any because my skin is so sensitive.

QuoteI study the faces of professional models in photos. If I think they look pretty, I study how they did it. Where is the eyeliner, what shade of shadow, lipstick, etc? These people have professionals doing their makeup, so I try to learn from them. Then I experiment to see how it looks on me.

Cool! My wife and I have tried a number of products that made us curious. My strategy (on her and me) has been to use as much as possible and still look the same 🤡
:icon_wave:
1999 we met and married :icon_archery:
Fall 2018 The woman hiding behind my husband's facade is coming out full time! :icon_female:
She began MTF HRT but had adverse reactions, so gave up on transitioning medically.
Summer 2022 I went through gender confirmation surgery as a result of cancer.
2024 my wife submitted letters approving of medically transitioning, she's legally changing her name and gender on all of her and our documents and accounts.
January 2025!  SURGERY!

Welcome, to Significant Others
https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247396.0.html

Our transitioning blog, "Opening The Cage"
https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,241591.0.html

BlueSky @weavinggrace.bsky.social
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Moonflower

Quote from: imallie on June 08, 2024, 09:14:49 AMSorry I misspoke. I think the Sephora one is $45, but they give you a bunch of free samples and it's "supposedly" a lot better than Ulta? But I suspect that is very much dependent on individual stores and even individual consultants you get. So it's a bit of rolling the dice.

We thought that Ulta would be great because our local store was staffed with trans, nonbinary, and other conspicuously unusual-looking people. Our local Sephora is staffed with conventional-looking people. Maybe that's more like what we're looking for...

QuoteThe Sephora one is specifically called "everyday" makeup and there are more dramatic versions you can sign up for. Plus they are famously trans friendly.  Even so, as said, I know it's rolling the dice. But really what's $45? Worth the experience if nothing else.  And if the result is ridiculous my wife and I will have a laugh and move on. 😂

Yes, I took pictures, and we continue to marvel at how unlike herself she looked. Makeup can sure alter appearances! It can be so expressive!
:icon_wave:
1999 we met and married :icon_archery:
Fall 2018 The woman hiding behind my husband's facade is coming out full time! :icon_female:
She began MTF HRT but had adverse reactions, so gave up on transitioning medically.
Summer 2022 I went through gender confirmation surgery as a result of cancer.
2024 my wife submitted letters approving of medically transitioning, she's legally changing her name and gender on all of her and our documents and accounts.
January 2025!  SURGERY!

Welcome, to Significant Others
https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247396.0.html

Our transitioning blog, "Opening The Cage"
https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,241591.0.html

BlueSky @weavinggrace.bsky.social
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imallie

Quote from: Moonflower on June 09, 2024, 06:33:03 AMWe thought that Ulta would be great because our local store was staffed with trans, nonbinary, and other conspicuously unusual-looking people. Our local Sephora is staffed with conventional-looking people. Maybe that's more like what we're looking for...

Yes, I took pictures, and we continue to marvel at how unlike herself she looked. Makeup can sure alter appearances! It can be so expressive!

I would have made the exact same call you did in that situation!

I continue to believe — and there's nothing wrong with either of these theories but simply that they differ — that some people consider being trans as their identity, while others consider transition a process... means to an end.

Personally I am in the latter, but I think those in the former category are more inclined to be more showy about things, which is great for them obviously. And perhaps thats the kind of crew who were staffing that shop? Just a theory for an early Sunday morning...
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Jenn104

About a year ago I paid for a lesson at Sephora. Full disclosure btw - I shop both stores. I have a sense of what I like from each. Both of my local stores are friendly, safe, and affirming environments.

I didn't show up with a passive "do somthing" attitude. I had very specific things I wanted to come away with. I also showed up with either pictures or actual product I was using at the time. As well as a how I was approaching things. I booked my consult on a non-weekend day I had off, so the rep felt no pressure to end the session. mmmm. with brutal honesty, I was back in the stage I think of as "clown make up"; too many layers applied too thickly.

I liked the sephora experience. I came away with copious notes. Everything from a daily and weekly skin care routine, to a better understanding of how to cover facial hair, as well as looks to try on my eyes. I wanted and got a decent tutorial 'day makeup'. I got more 'hey! try these things to see how you think you look' as opposed to hard skills or an absolute look. Makeup in my opinion is finding the product and look you want, not what someone else says. Oh.. and my local sephora always comes with a hard upsell.

My impression of both Ulta and Sephora is if left to their own on consults and make overs they tend to "full glam" for a night out look. Which can be fun.  I mean though how often does a gal go that way? My practical streak won out and I am glad it did.

Happy Sunday,

~Jenn

"I want to be remembered as a woman ... who dared to be a catalyst of change."
                 - Shirley Chisolm

"We need to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections."
                  - Marsha P. Johnson

"Why not question everything?"
                  - Lynn Conway


imallie

I do nothing right now Jenn... so I'm looking for some real, starting point basics. I did mess around with stuff a bit a few months back, and then I nearly lopped my thumb off with a mandoline and I haven't returned to it.

I don't imagine I will wear much every day makeup.. but, just like with my hair, my preference is to start by learning a few basics from an expert and then picking the few points from that that serve me.

We'll see how it goes. I'll target a friday, as my wife is home working that day so she'll be able to see the result immediately before I wash it off. LOL
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Lori Dee

I learned a lot from YouTube videos. I would search for something specific like "How to eye makeup for over 40". Before I had my eyelid surgery, I looked for how to do eye makeup for droopy eyelids. Many times what I found was not what I was looking for, but sometimes I would find some interesting techniques. My cousin explained how to do mascara over the phone! Yup, I was doing it wrong. Her tips saved me much frustration.
My Life is Based on a True Story
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete
  • skype:.?call
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Jenn104

Quote from: LoriDee on June 09, 2024, 09:50:34 AMI learned a lot from YouTube videos. I would search for something specific like "How to eye makeup for over 40". Before I had my eyelid surgery, I looked for how to do eye makeup for droopy eyelids. Many times what I found was not what I was looking for, but sometimes I would find some interesting techniques. My cousin explained how to do mascara over the phone! Yup, I was doing it wrong. Her tips saved me much frustration.

Caveat with youtube videos--- watch them and learn, just be a little wary and apply common sense. When I needed beard cover and was trying to figure out beard cover, I recall seeing a few videos where lipstick was used as a concealer. Hard stop - lipstick is for lips, not skin. Be wary of anything where a product is misused and any video that's more product placement than technique.

Allie? the best advice I have is embrace your mistakes. I honestly wonder how my co-workers didn't break out laughing in hindsight. Like anything in life, how to get your look down is a learned skill. Find a place to start, try a lot of things, lean on Mrs Allie, laugh a little, don't be afraid to be self critical. Embrace the early transition-y thing and enjoy it.

Oh - and I hope your thumbs better Allie. I love my mandolin and use healthy caution with it. Its the scariest edge in the house.

~Jenn

"I want to be remembered as a woman ... who dared to be a catalyst of change."
                 - Shirley Chisolm

"We need to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections."
                  - Marsha P. Johnson

"Why not question everything?"
                  - Lynn Conway

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imallie

Quote from: Jenn104 on June 09, 2024, 10:08:28 AMCaveat with youtube videos--- watch them and learn, just be a little wary and apply common sense. When I needed beard cover and was trying to figure out beard cover, I recall seeing a few videos where lipstick was used as a concealer. Hard stop - lipstick is for lips, not skin. Be wary of anything where a product is misused and any video that's more product placement than technique.

Allie? the best advice I have is embrace your mistakes. I honestly wonder how my co-workers didn't break out laughing in hindsight. Like anything in life, how to get your look down is a learned skill. Find a place to start, try a lot of things, lean on Mrs Allie, laugh a little, don't be afraid to be self critical. Embrace the early transition-y thing and enjoy it.

Oh - and I hope your thumbs better Allie. I love my mandolin and use healthy caution with it. Its the scariest edge in the house.

~Jenn



I totally learn from my errors, Jenn. But I've also learned, over the years, to lean on the expertise of others. When you spend time listening and observing at outset, you can avoid a lot of the avoidable mistakes. But that's just me.

As for mistakes I didn't learn - mandolines are sharp. 😂. It's since been retired. I now do a chef's cut for my apples, and I should have done this before but I'm not sure I ever knew the technique.

My thumb is still a bit numb, but despite the scar at least if's still attached.  😉
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imallie

Big morning here - closet clean out. My wife set up a BB/BS donation for later this week and we are getting rid of .... 80 percent of my guy clothing? Keeping a few sweatshirts, some tshirts, Mets gear and stuff from my college (some od it team issue gear, so it's pretty gender neutral). And we're now able to move all my new clothing into my closet.

And we just went shopping and got another 10-15 items to try.

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Lori Dee

I did something similar. I kept the gender-neutral sweatshirts and pants (for winter lounging). I kept three pairs of men's jeans that I call my "grubbies" that I wear when prospecting. They get muddy and bashed on rocks, and yet are durable enough to take the punishment over the years. My women's jeans are more fashionable than durable.
My Life is Based on a True Story
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete
  • skype:.?call
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Jenn104

Quote from: imallie on June 09, 2024, 10:47:02 AMI totally learn from my errors, Jenn. But I've also learned, over the years, to lean on the expertise of others. When you spend time listening and observing at outset, you can avoid a lot of the avoidable mistakes. But that's just me.


Some of what you're going to learn is personal preference. Experts can get you close, you get to decide what it is you think looks best. For example, my first eye shadow was a palette with a range in the taupe family. I found that family very forgiving. As my tastes evolved with practice and experience, I added a palette in the umber family. The taupes are from one brand, the umbers a different brand. Different brands had different shades. In-store experts helped me figure the color family, I still had to navigate specifics. I found I needed a few weeks at a minimum to decide how much or little I liked a specific color btw, I needed to have it on at work, come home, and see how I looked and felt. YMMV on that.

The fun part is you eventually settle on a look you like. You figure yourself out.

~Jenn
"I want to be remembered as a woman ... who dared to be a catalyst of change."
                 - Shirley Chisolm

"We need to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections."
                  - Marsha P. Johnson

"Why not question everything?"
                  - Lynn Conway

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