May 25th... that was when I sent out the last batch of my coming out letters, and when we decided that 70 was more than enough people to tell individually.

When I had lunch with a friend/former staffer this week he asked what the responses were, and I said 100% positive... and he asked further if I'd heard from everyone, and I said well 69 out of 70.  But when I identified the 70th, he wasn't surprised. It was his former boss (and my former employee) and this person is famously non-responsive.

So I didn't for a second read anything into it, nor assume any reaction on their part.

Well this morning, I got a response. 😂

It basically said "sorry for the delay. Even though I don't really understand everything you're going through we are still friends. And do you want to get together for lunch in the next week or so?"

Can't make this stuff up.

I replied and said "no worries" and told him I was just about to reach out to offer some tickets to baseball for he and his family (the kids love fireworks!).

I BRIEFLY suggested to my wife that I wait and reply to him in about 6 weeks, but that was met with one of her  "oh please" eye rolls... so.. well, I knew I wasn't going to do that anyway. It was just nice to allow myself to think about doing it for 10 seconds!

Anyway,
Happy Friday everyone!
Love,
Allie

Quote from: imallie on July 05, 2024, 01:44:27 PMIt basically said "sorry for the delay. Even though I don't really understand everything you're going through we are still friends. And do you want to get together for lunch in the next week or so?"

These kinds of people are extremely rare. And extremely precious. I always remember a quote I heard a long time ago, I forget who from, but it went along the lines of: "I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you."

People who are okay with not getting it, and not really caring that they don't get it, but respecting you enough to accept that YOU get it... those are the kinds of people you keep in your life.

That's awesome.

Quote from: Sephirah on July 05, 2024, 03:59:44 PMPeople who are okay with not getting it, and not really caring that they don't get it, but respecting you enough to accept that YOU get it... those are the kinds of people you keep in your life.

That's awesome.

My best friend told me "That's your path to walk, not mine. But I am still there with you."
 

Quote from: Sephirah on July 05, 2024, 03:59:44 PMThese kinds of people are extremely rare. And extremely precious. I always remember a quote I heard a long time ago, I forget who from, but it went along the lines of: "I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you."

People who are okay with not getting it, and not really caring that they don't get it, but respecting you enough to accept that YOU get it... those are the kinds of people you keep in your life.

That's awesome.

My friends and family painted their responses in a wide array of colors, using brushes of various sizes —- but each and every one produced a piece which spoke of loving support. I don't take that for granted.  I've always been fortunate to be surrounded with some wonderful people in my life.

Tonight will be my last night sleeping with just my "bio hair"... my topper gets bolted on tomorrow morning. Looking very much forward to it. We have lots of questions about how caring for it while attached compares to how I've been doing things now, but I'm sure we'll get all that info and more!

George Orwell: "At 50, everyone has the face he deserves."

Well, when it comes to friends, at 50, every woman has the friends she deserves. By 50, we've had half a century to determine what constitutes a real friend and what doesn't. Perhaps we had our wild flings with drama queens, but by 50, if we haven't finally found real friends, we never will.

So, Allie, I'm not surprised that your friends have unanimously avowed support, for you're solid too. Pragmatic. Not silly. You've gathered the friends you've earned.

I'm assuming they'll be using pneumatic wrenches to bolt the topper to your head to get the torque just right. 

It is quite affirming to have hair that reaches the middle my back.
I have to be careful that it doesn't get caught in zippers.
I can see why a lot of older women opt for shorter hairstyles but the minor hassles are worth it!

Marion

Quote from: Maid Marion on July 06, 2024, 07:44:21 AMIt is quite affirming to have hair that reaches the middle my back.
I have to be careful that it doesn't get caught in zippers.
I can see why a lot of older women opt for shorter hairstyles but the minor hassles are worth it!

Marion

I've had waist-length hair a couple times in my life. What I didn't like about it was trying to turn over in the middle of the night and having hair trapped under me preventing me from flipping. Taking four hours to dry was also a hassle. I enjoy my Bob now.

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on July 06, 2024, 11:56:06 AMI've had waist-length hair a couple times in my life. What I didn't like about it was trying to turn over in the middle of the night and having hair trapped under me preventing me from flipping. Taking four hours to dry was also a hassle. I enjoy my Bob now.

Please say hi to Bob for me. He sounds nice.😘

Got my hair did. Really really love this salon. The owner came right over when I came in and called me by name and was asking me and my wife how things were going and how my topper was treating me and just so warm.

My stylist is a real sweetie too. I told my wife I got "this close" to mentioning the boy to her.. but a) I think she might be a few years older than he is b) she just got a dog and said she thinks being a "furr mommy" is all she wants to be... and we want grand kids and c) the boy would KILL ME if I ever tried something like that.  So... I did not.

Hair is now bolted on, and styled so nicely I want to live in a hermetically sealed room, climate controlled room with just a slight breeze (it looks good when it moves).

But we're going to a game tonight, so a baseball cap is going on in a few minutes and it won't look this good again until the next visit. C'est la vie!

Oh, and we went to lunch after and I do have a cute story to share from that... I'll do so when we get back later.

Love,
Allie

Quote from: Maid Marion on July 06, 2024, 07:44:21 AMIt is quite affirming to have hair that reaches the middle my back.
I have to be careful that it doesn't get caught in zippers.
I can see why a lot of older women opt for shorter hairstyles but the minor hassles are worth it!

Marion

Waking up in the middle of the night, choking on your own hair... is also not fun, lol. Took me much too long to realise that having a ponytail, or a hair net, before you go to bed is a step in the right direction, lol.

I have had long hair since probably my early 20s. Now it's like... my one thing I can take pride in. It's down to my... ahem... posterior. So I would not cut it short for anything. I am wary of anyone called Delilah I am not ashamed to say I dye it black and pink/purple, like a Licorice Allsort. And it makes me happy.

So as promised... the story from lunch.

After the hair appointment, we went for lunch at this nice place that will likely be our go-to post-salon spot now. I need to go every four weeks going forward (although each of my next three appointments are booked five weeks out, so hopefully that proves sufficient).

Anyway, after lunch my wife got up to use the restroom and left me with her credit card in case the server came over with the check. When he did, I gave him the card. And when he returned quickly (before she did) he thanked me and called me by my wife's name (the name on the card).

When I told my wife about this, she laughed and said "Here we go..."

She figured it's just the start of people confusing us, going forward.

So I offered a solution, old school:

"We could be like Laverne and Shirley!" I said. "You could sew a big initial on all your clothes going forward and then no one would ever do that again!"

"You first," she said.

So we decided to table that for now.

 

Allie, as you know, you and your wife enjoy a great dynamic. You have so much fun. Two, old gals riding off into the sunset. FWIW, my wife and I laugh a lot too.

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on July 07, 2024, 03:46:05 AMAllie, as you know, you and your wife enjoy a great dynamic. You have so much fun. Two, old gals riding off into the sunset. FWIW, my wife and I laugh a lot too.

Key to everything, right? Trans, gay, straight, Vulcan, Methodist, etc... the category doesn't really matter. If you SHARE laughs often (as opposed to laughing at each other's expense) it makes life that much easier and infinitely more enjoyable. 

I like the Lavern and Sherley idea. Now I have their theme song stuck in my head. Quite fitting for you though. 

Quote from: Gina P on July 07, 2024, 07:08:33 AMI like the Lavern and Sherley idea. Now I have their theme song stuck in my head. Quite fitting for you though.

One (or both?) of them was always drinking "Pepsi and milk"... so that would have to be a hard stop where the comparison ended. While a Root Beer float can be delightful on rare occasions, I do remember trying this concoction at least once in my youth... Bleeech. Not a fan.

By the way? Since I'm all about us all getting just a little bit smarter every day? Here's a nugget I only recently learned which I'm' happy to share. Feel free to use it in your personal life or, you know, to impress people at parties. I'm not the boss of you...😂

Have you ever noticed that Coca-Cola products at McDonalds are simply better than anywhere else you get them? We haven't eaten at a McDonald's in maybe a decade, but on the rare occasion we do a highway drivethrough for a drink, it's always noticeable how the Coke or Diet Coke just objectively tastes BETTER.

It's not random, it's not subjective. It's done with full intent.

My sister-in-law, a life-long (until she retired in her FOURTIES!) McDonald's employee, is a notorious Diet Coke critic. She will order it at a restaurant and with one sip be able to tell you what is wrong with their process.

She told us this, the other day:

McDonald's is the only company in the world with an exclusive contract with Coke to service its machines.

When Coke machines are installed (in restaurants, movie theaters, etc), they are calibrated by Coke. And after that they are self-managed by the site. They can sign a service agreement where they get Coke re-calibration on an annual basis, and some do.

But McDonalds get theirs done MONTHLY. All machines. Everywhere. The lines professionally cleaned and recalibrated to install standards. Which is why they always taste that way.

Who knew right?

My wife is at our niece's baby shower today.

Invitations were sent out before I was out... but my niece did say I was more than welcome to come. Even so, from my wife's description of these events over the years it held no allure to me so I was a hard pass.

If my wife had said she wanted me to come instead of her spending time with my side of the family alone, of course I would have ... but they've always liked her more than me (who doesn't?) so ... that's not an issue. She preferred I get a day off.

So instead (although it's awfully warm and muggy here) I might go into the "muffin lab" and try something new. I personally love coconut AND I love dates, but the taste of them together is, I believe, one of the great pairings. And it's not done enough.

So... I think I'll give that a try, as a muffin. Now my wife is not really a fan of EITHER item, which makes the target that much smaller to hit, and makes me want to try it even more. Which shows how much I miss working and going from crisis to crisis, that I literally have to set myself artificial muffin-based issues to overcome so as to feel I've accomplished anything.

Yeah, sad. I know.

But we play the hand we're dealt, I'm afraid.  😘

Love,
Allie

Have you tried a muddy water? that's a coke with orange juice. Or a tequila sunset, orange with a shot of blackcurrant cordial.

Quote from: davina61 on July 07, 2024, 12:36:08 PMHave you tried a muddy water? that's a coke with orange juice. Or a tequila sunset, orange with a shot of blackcurrant cordial.

A tequila sunrise, yes... not sunset. But that was back in the day when I could drink alcohol. Sadly, since all the headaches and all the meds, I steer clear.

The muddy water thing? That, however, sounds like it would drive me to drink. That sounds like the kind of thing you drink on a dare. However... you should never dismiss something without trying it, so at some point... I might try to make a small sample of this to try. But I already know I will hate it. 🤢🤮

But, but, but... what if it cures the headaches?