Got my earring in in about two minutes today... so that's quite the improvement.

Maybe I'm not so hopeless after all. 😉

By the way... in case anyone doubted me...🪄

I live by this: Practice makes pert good.

Quote from: imallie on July 31, 2024, 12:17:11 PMGot my earring in in about two minutes today... so that's quite the improvement.

Maybe I'm not so hopeless after all. 😉

By the way... in case anyone doubted me...🪄

I want to see you do that when you have nice long feminine nails 😎

Ellen

Quote from: EllenW on July 31, 2024, 06:03:38 PMI want to see you do that when you have nice long feminine nails 😎

Pretty pink or red nails is all you need for your nails to look feminine.

I have small hands so merely having nice clean looking natural nails is also quite feminine.
The simple clean look takes a lot of work!

Quote from: EllenW on July 31, 2024, 06:03:38 PMI want to see you do that when you have nice long feminine nails 😎

Ellen

Challenge... maybe accepted.  I think it's not beyond the realm of possibility that I try nails at some point... but the word "long" will not be a part of it.

And I've been working on some sleight of hand stuff, so if the nails interfere... that's a plus, because I'm not very good at it (small hands) and I could use the nails as an excuse ("Oh I could do that trick, but not with these nails!")

Quote from: Maid Marion on July 31, 2024, 06:48:39 PMPretty pink or red nails is all you need for your nails to look feminine.

I have small hands so merely having nice clean looking natural nails is also quite feminine.
The simple clean look takes a lot of work!

Did my toenails (well my wife did) before the beach a few weeks ago. And probably will again before we go this weekend. But hadn't thought of doing my fingernails, Marion. My nails are not very nice... so I'm not sure. I have small hands too.. and "takes a lot of work" does not sound like something that interests me.

Now, "pay a lady and sit there for 30 minutes"? THAT sounds right up my particular alley (or, you know, Allie, such as it is)

Long nails make your fingers look longer and thinner. I can't wear fake nails as I keep breaking them off. I grow them out and paint them with color and hardener and they last about a week. It's cheaper than paying someone to do it for me.

I need some "hard as nails" as I keep breaking the first 2 on my right hand, they have gone thin and keep splitting. Working on making stuff not helping and the index on left hand is taking ages to grow back after fungal infection. Acrylic nails I had fitted a good few years ago messed up my nails as well leaving ridges.

Long nails can be a curse, lol. As a former PC gamer, my nails literally gouged chunks out of the side of my mouse... and they can be really annoying to type with.

Gel polish my dears!  No longer than 4mm past finger tips.  That combo lasts pretty near a fortnight, longer if you'll use nytril gloves for heavier work including dishes! 

Experience says to advise the nail tech to take the minimum amount of the natural nail to create the surface for original sets and refills.  They'll look fine and avoid weakening the nail, forcing reliance on the "fake nails for a few years as they recover, maybe never to do so. 

Light pink on fingers and red or French white tips [painted not plastic] with pink or clear on toesies.  Your milage may vary   By the by, gel needs the UV light to cure, otherwise the varnish/paint/product never cures.

Lots of good advice - thanks!

I might end up waiting until we go on vacation. We're talking about doing two weeks in the Caribbean at an all-inclusive spot in the spring (you know — private pool, walk out of your room onto the beach — that sort of nightmare LOL). Just a real "us" trip. And those places are lousy with spas and such. That would be a good time to experiment with nails.

Just a thought.

Had a productive introductory meeting with the "lifestyle coordinator" (that 100% was NOT her title... just for the life of me I don't recall what it was) from my wife's employer.

She was great. She, for starters, helped us get my name changed in a lot of her work systems, and as beneficiary on insurance and a few other things. We talked through benefits and insurance as I prepare to start doing consults for surgery — and she's getting me a personal contact from the insurer who specializes in this stuff and he/she will help walk me through things from the insurance side of things. (As well as getting my name changed on insurance cards). That seems hugely helpful.

Oh also? I was 100% certain (and had told my wife so for... you know, nearly two years now) that our insurance covered hair removal for bottom surgery but not facial. But she said there might be a way to do it, and she was going to look into it and get back to me. I got QUITE the eye roll from my wife on that one. I do hope it's true going forward, but if so — the amount of money we spent out of pocket that we didn't need to... oh boy.

But otherwise, she is clearly an ally. I told her we've assembled a really good team and told her in general what we've done and how things are going... and she said "well first, let me just applaud you on... well, EVERYTHING... and second, I just want you to know if you give me the ball I will do my best to score a touchdown for you guys."  So, yeah, we like her a lot!

Love,
Allie

That is awesome.
Sad that you can't recoup some of the money you spent up-front. But going forward, you'll save a bundle so you can afford those pricey nail salons.

Quote from: imallie on August 01, 2024, 05:23:52 PMLots of good advice - thanks!

I might end up waiting until we go on vacation. We're talking about doing two weeks in the Caribbean at an all-inclusive spot in the spring (you know — private pool, walk out of your room onto the beach — that sort of nightmare LOL). Just a real "us" trip. And those places are lousy with spas and such. That would be a good time to experiment with nails.

Just a thought.

I got to this point before I was like "Yeah this is not a good look!"

Here's a little shot of guilt, along with my daily new recognition of a way my wife is just beyond amazing.

So as I alluded to earlier, we are in the process of looking at all-inclusive beach resorts as part of her sabbatical next year.

Last evening we'd settled on one, but after she went to bed I found a few aspects I thought we better done by some competitors, so this morning I started a brief discussion with her:

Me: Hey, I was looking into that place a little last night, and I found a few things...
Her: Is it not [LGBTQ, Gay, or Same-Sex Couple ... I don't recall which one she said] friendly?
Me: Uh... no, I don't think that's an issue
Her: Right, neither did I. I checked that out last night.

So call this stupidity, ignorance..or just a raging case of myopic thinking -- but I never think of us that way. I forget that, technically, I'm a lesbian... and therefore by definition I'm gay and we're a same-sex couple.

I think because before this all began I was madly in love with my wife... and today? I'm madly in love with my wife, I somehow still just think of myself as "straight". Yeah, I know it's preposterous. Once I give it ANY thought I know what the truth is, but when I don't think about it, that's my brain's default.

Part of the issue (guilt coming up) is that we have lesbian friends. And we know that their coming out was a life changing moment for them. Announcing a change in their sexual orientation to friends and loved ones took a huge act of bravery.

And for me? It's like an afterthought. It's a side dish to the main course, you know? And I feel like it sort of diminishes that action. And yet, it is what it is.

Furthermore, I willingly have entered into all this. My wife -- and again, in my silly brain I still see "straight" because nothing has changed in many regards -- she now sees herself, correctly in a same-sex relationship.  We've never talked terminology. I haven't heard her call me her "wife" for example. I don't know if we will just stick to spouse -- that's really her call -- but this is all a huge part of it for her. And that public facing part of all this -- because initially I was concerned about ME and how I'd relate. But now that that's all second nature, I realize what  big leaps this has been for her. And I'm in awe.

Had my first "kids" encounter this morning. Ummm, it was a bit awkward and surprising... but also not really my job, I don't think. Oh also, from one perspective, at least what I've heard anecdotally, it went swimmingly.

We went to the beach to see my sister, and her family. Her husband, and all four of her kids. One of them — my nephew (who I just met for lunch last week) — is the only one two kids, he has daughter ( and a son (5). We only see them a few times a year, but they've been to the house for Thanksgiving — and the girl has called me "the greatest chef I've ever met" on several occasions for my desserts. (I mean that's flattering? But,you know, she's eight. How many has she met, really?)

So when we walked in, I guess I assumed my nephew and/or his wife would have told the kids something about me. But it was very apparent that they hadn't. The daughter came out first and my sister said, "Say hi! You know them, you've at their house for thanksgiving" (or something like that). The girl looked at me and said, quietly to her dad "I don't know who she is... I don't know who either of them are." (I guess she didn't recognize my wife out of context).

When the boy came out he also had no idea who we were, and then came up to me and just asked if I wanted to play.

The rest of the morning was fine. That whole family is good. Everyone is super supportive and wonderful. I think once my sister slipped with a "he", but she said "she" a half dozen times too... so I know it was a slip.

Took some nice pics, had lots of laughs and then we left (we have dinner with one of my sisters-in-law and her husband later).

But as we were driving away, I said to my wife... we agreed this morning that we were hosting Thanksgiving again... their parents have to say something to the kids, right? If only to tell them what to call me. However they want to handle it is fine. Not going to inject myself into that.

Guess we'll see.

But not being sniffed out by kids who know me. I think that's a feather in my cap? What do I know, thoug.                                                                                                 

QuoteAnd for me? It's like an afterthought. It's a side dish to the main course, you know? And I feel like it sort of diminishes that action. And yet, it is what it is.

I'm step-for-step with ya, Sister.

Cool story about the kids. Such a transformation you've undergone, huh?

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on August 03, 2024, 02:55:43 PMI'm step-for-step with ya, Sister.

Cool story about the kids. Such a transformation you've undergone, huh?

Yeah, it sometimes takes moments like these for it to hit home.

It still doesn't obfuscate the larger point — I guess I need to prepare myself for the grand nieces and nephews (we have 19... I think, just did a quick count in my head) not being told anything. I shouldn't assume they'll be briefed.

We went to dinner one of my sisters in law and her husband tonight, and were related the story from this morning. She mentioned how her daughter told her daughter about me — or at least broached the subject. Talking about how some people feel different inside than out, and take actions to make their outsides match the way they feel on the inside.

Ironically, they live in Texas — so I said, couldn't she get in trouble for even telling that to her daughter, and her dad said "no, but if a teacher said that to her, that teacher very much could."  How terrifying and sad is that?

 

QuoteIronically, they live in Texas — so I said, couldn't she get in trouble for even telling that to her daughter, and her dad said "no, but if a teacher said that to her, that teacher very much could."  How terrifying and sad is that?

The whole notion that a teacher isn't to be trusted is predicated upon the misassumption that strangers are the danger.

When a child is murdered, the police don't ask, "Did you see any strangers recently?"

Rather, they turn their attention to the family because they're most likely to murder a child.

It's that way for women too: the men we know are most likely to rape and murder us, not the strangers we don't know.

Quote from: imallie on August 04, 2024, 12:39:32 AMTalking about how some people feel different inside than out, and take actions to make their outsides match the way they feel on the inside.

A good explanation, tuned just right for a child.

Quote from: Oldandcreaky on August 04, 2024, 06:55:01 AMIt's that way for women too: the men we know are most likely to rape and murder us, not the strangers we don't know.

Something my dad says:

"Only your friends will do it to you. You don't let your enemies get that close."