Hey everyone,

Wesley here,

No, I never adopted a femme name despite having crossdressed to some degree, since I had discovered the forbidden thrill of wearing lingerie back in 1975.(at age 13 to 14.) Well actually I first discovered the thrill of putting on lingerie about that time. I crossed the line and set my future one night making up a semester of sophomore English when I wore a pair of panties under my otherwise normal jeans to class one night.

The feeling was indescribable. Abject fear,I would be discovered and publically embarresed while at the same time an amazing sense of EXHILARATION.  The hook was set for a lifetime of behavior with that one unintentional act. Now almost 50 years later, I have not worn traditional mens underware for many years.

At the ripe old age of 65 I still wear panties and frequently a bra and size 5 breast forms daily. I have been married 3 times, all the wives knew and participated. I always made it a point to let them know:

1. Before we were ever married and
2. Before we became intimate.

Back in the mid 1990's I discovered that my midwestern city had a chapter of T R I E S S (damn pad computer keeps autocorrecting to "try-less" which is WRONG!!)  My wife and I were able to attend a few meeting. Before the local and national both fell apart.  For those of you unfamiliar the organization was founded for crossdressers and to promote the idea that male crossdressing DID NOT mean:

1. The crossdressers was gay or:
2. That the crossdressers wanted to become a woman.

I think you can see what happened, the groups were co-oped by transgender individuals about the time sex change became widely available.  Nationwide the organization went from 43 chapters to just 3 in a very short time..  Leaving those of use who did NOT want to change sex totally without a support network.

I don't blame my transgender sisters, but overlooked was the fact that some of us had wrestled with the idea and yet decided to remain male while enjoing wearing feminine items. In that respect I have no regrets, but then, I have been a health care provider since 1993, and was aware of the behind the scenes reality of sex "reassignment.

So, today there are still less than 5 chapters of T R I E S S.  Not much of a support network was left for "just crossdressers." I have to worry about someone coming of age today and discovering a pair of panties or bra can be "quite stimulating" as there are many who will rush to convince them they are transsexual as opposed to to a crossdressers....I digress however-

Today, I still wear bra, panties, breastforms and have my legs,chest,and back waxed. Often while openly wearing quite visible ballet flats, women's Nike or other women's athletic shoes or keds shoes as well. Not because I want to "Be" a woman BUT because flaunting societal norms and having a secret that coworkers and people in general have no clue about the fact of WHAT I am wearing under WHAT the public sees. 

There was an interesting psychological dynamic that I inadvertently set up back in 1975, that still deeply affects me today.

I suspect many have forgotten that idea. That at some point taking off the feminine things was quite alright! One can switch between having feminine attributes or NOT. Meanwhile crossdressing today is dying out.  I used to enjoy posting on a site called Crossdressers-haven. But today it is just a memory. It went forever off line a while back, but then their traffic had greatly dropped off in the last 20 years.

Perhaps the true crossdressers are the rare bird and ->-bleeped-<- is forever ascendant. I just encourage everyone to consider the issue carefully.

Still underdressing makes me feel normal.

@whorton59
Dear Wesley  aka: whorton59
I am thrilled to see that you have returned to the Forum after all of these years.
I see that you have been a member on Susan's Place and the Forum since 2013.
              WELCOME BACK
 
Please take some time and look around and read the various threads authored by many of our
members ... you will find discussions and testimonials that will certainly be of interest
to you as you continue on in your life endeavors.

As you might be aware, the site experienced a site crash on January 1st this year and much
data was lost including member accounts, postings, private messaging, etc.

Through what seemed to be endless work, our staff has done a great job in piecing things
together again to very quickly have a fully operation site even though much of the lost
data appears to be unrecoverable. 

Some things have changed here on the Forum since you were last here... you should
read a couple announcements that were posted after the crash:

                  The New Years Outage and our Lost years
              https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,246809.0.html

                    The "NEW" updated Forum
              https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247170.0.html 

            Important Update: Revising Our Language Moderation Guidelines
                https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247169.0.html
           
              The Foul Language and Respectful Communication Policy
                https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247168.0.html

... and be certain to read the revised and updated Terms of Service rules for the site.
              As we embark on this new chapter, we urge all returning members to familiarize themselves
              with our updated Terms of Service (TOS), which are vital for maintaining a respectful,
              inclusive, and safe environment for everyone.
You can review the new TOS here: 
              Susan's Place: Community Guidelines and Terms of Service
            --> https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,2.0.html

NOTE: If you have any questions regarding the Forum please feel free to
send a Forum private message to me or you can Email me at alaskandanielle@yahoo.com

Many HUGS, and a BIG warm WELCOME back.
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
The Forum Administrator

cc:  @Sarah B  @Lori Dee

@whorton59

Hello Wesley,

I'm Lori Dee. Welcome back to Susan's Place!

Thank you for contributing to the discussion. I agree with your sentiment that we (trans folk, especially trans women) tend to take the spotlight lately. It is not intentional on our part, but we are a bigger target politically, so people forget that there are other "colors" of the spectrum. I very much appreciated your post, because I think it is important to hear your point of view. That is how we learn.

We strive to make this a safe place to find information and to share your thoughts and comments. No matter who you may be, you are always welcome at Susan's Place. We have a whole Crossdressers forum and I look forward to reading more about your experiences.

If you are comfortable doing so, please feel free to stop by the Introductions Forum and re-introduce yourself to us that have joined fairly recently.

As Danielle mentioned, the site has changed. Please review the links at the end of this message, they include information that will help you navigate the site and use the available features. Please pay particular attention to the links marked in RED. When you reach 15 posts, you will be able to send and reply to private messages and you will also be able to add an avatar to your profile. Until then if you have any questions about the Susan's Place site and the Forums, please feel free to contact me at  LoriDee605@outlook.com

Once again, Welcome back to Susan's Place!

~ Lori Dee

Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By

Standard Terms & Definitions Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) Cautionary Note News posting & quoting guidelines Photo, avatars, & signature images policy Membership Agreement

@Sarah B
@Northern Star Girl

Hi Wesley,

I doubt crossdressing is dying out.  It is who you are.  Guys who crossdress never change.

But, online forums are a brutal place as differences in viewpoint or opinion are rarely tolerated.
There are always a few who can't see the world as being different from the way they see it!

Crossdressers have it especially bad as their behavior involves hiding rather than standing up for themselves.  While transgenders are busy tearing down walls and learning how to make their status public by changing official documents!

Marion

Quote from: Maid Marion on August 07, 2024, 10:57:13 AMHi Wesley,

I doubt crossdressing is dying out.  It is who you are.  Guys who crossdress never change.

But, online forums are a brutal place as differences in viewpoint or opinion are rarely tolerated.
There are always a few who can't see the world as being different from the way they see it!

Crossdressers have it especially bad as their behavior involves hiding rather than standing up for themselves.  While transgenders are busy tearing down walls and learning how to make their status public by changing official documents!

Marion

Well said, MM.

The entire LGBTQ Community is more accepting because we understand that everyone is different and has an inherent right to express themselves in any way they choose. The reasons are not as important as the right to be ourselves. That's what makes Susan's Place so valuable. It is not just a resource for information, but an online support group that understands the true meaning of the word "diversity".

Hello Wesley

My name is Sarah B and I would also like to formally, Welcome you back to Susan's Place!

I see that other members Lori, Marion and Danielle have also welcomed you back to Susan's as well.

I really appreciated the reflections on your crossdressing, it was really immersive and your semester of sophomore English certainly paid off.

I never crossed dressed, although I wore female clothing and the last two years before I changed my life around I wore female clothes underneath my normal attire at the time, this was during the late Eighties.  To me it just felt right, although I knew in a sense that crossdressing was wrong.

Society needs to get over itself in what people wear and the general trend is society is becoming more accepting of what people wear.  This may be one of the reasons why crossdressing clubs are dying out and being consumed my the overall 'transgender' movement as you mention in your post. 

However, the 'Seahorse Society' is a crossdressing club of Australia at the time I wrote them a letter.  They still are and with help for the those with 'transgender' issues.  The Seahorse Society was my first and only contact and they provided me with an address in a letter, that allowed me to change my life around.

Letting your partners before hand is very enlightening given that the normal, one would keep their activities a secret.  In addition the foundation that TRIESS   (my computer did not change the spelling it must be your word program!) is founded is admirable, I had never heard of this organization until you mentioned it.

As one is want to say "we live in interesting times" and what happens in the future is anyone's guess.  Marion and Lori, certainly made some cognizant facts about crossdressing.

Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the other forums and threads.  I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new members.  In your case I certainly did.

In addition members of Susan's will more than likely will discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as most have experienced these issues as well.

Take care and all the best for the future.

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!
Sarah B
Offical Greeter
@LoriDee
@Northern Star Girl
@whorton59
@Maid Marion

Quote from: whorton59 on August 07, 2024, 02:34:25 AMPerhaps the true crossdressers are the rare bird and ->-bleeped-<- is forever ascendant. I just encourage everyone to consider the issue carefully.

Still underdressing makes me feel normal.

Hi, I am also a kind of a babyboomer crossdresser, but I do not care about labels such as transsexual and crossdressing. Everybody is unique whatever people label him or her.

Korea is a conservative country, but I teach at a university while wearing a miniskirt. And I did not rely on any support group when I came out to present as who I am. A long story short, I do not hide anything to people. I sometimes appear on TV news to explain my expertise issues. For example: https://www.youtube.com/live/ZY1us8N3EyM?si=Rk4mQHWIxk14LSz4&t=971

BTW, recently I started to upload my everyday life and fashion at my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@barbiekorea21
Now I am promoting the channel.

Cheers,

barbie~~