Quote from: ChrissyRyan on November 30, 2024, 08:58:35 PMNot sure about that for me though as I love to wear my female clothes.  Maybe for outside or dirty work as stronger "male design" material has its benefits!

I have one pair of men's jeans and a couple of flannel shirts that my dad gave me. I only wear them when I am mining for that very reason. I find them uncomfortable to wear but they are more durable and I don't want to get my good jeans all muddy or torn on sharp rocks. I only wear them in the summer but I am shopping for some women's jeans and shirts that I can wear as my "grubbies". That's what Thrift Shops are for. 

Quote from: Lori Dee on November 30, 2024, 09:09:12 PMI have one pair of men's jeans and a couple of flannel shirts that my dad gave me. I only wear them when I am mining for that very reason. I find them uncomfortable to wear but they are more durable and I don't want to get my good jeans all muddy or torn on sharp rocks. I only wear them in the summer but I am shopping for some women's jeans and shirts that I can wear as my "grubbies". That's what Thrift Shops are for. 

Consider trying some "boyfriend shirts" that are often flannel, they are oversized and somewhat tougher.  Or get some lady's Carthart or similar brand shirts at a rural or farm or tractor store, or wherever they are sold.  Got a lady's flannel plaid shirt for $10 on sale last November.  Warm and thick. 

Chrissy

Sometimes a long sleeve sweatshirt works fine too, they are generally thick and durable.

I do not want to get my pretty ones dirty though but I have a time worn sweatshirt!

Not good in hot weather though.

Chrissy

I have some well worn women's Levi's 501 jeans.  The material is the same (or very similar) to the men's 501's.  One pair of these has become my "grubby" jeans.  The women,s 501's have decent pockets too.

Back on the subject of the thread...

Up until about 2 months ago it was not being able to wear skirts out in public.  My situation just doesn't allow it at this time.

The "toughest on going thing" now, is that my breast have stopped hurting.  That most likely means that they are no longer growing and I'm not where I wan't to be yet.  I know that breast growth can go in spurts, so I still have hope.  This weighs on me daily. 

I did have a med change recently, and I'm going to give the new med some more time.  Then, who knows...

Paulie.

Voice. I got told I looked  good but sound like  a  bouncer! 

Hi Everyone

I haven't experienced any recurring issues or inhibitors, when changing my life around.  From the moment I began living as Sarah, I was always  moving forward without hesitation.  The only real concern I faced early on was worrying that someone might notice I was "different" the first time I presented as myself in public.  However, nothing happened, and that fear quickly faded.

Another significant worry came before my surgery.  I was terrified that, if arrested for any reason, I might face severe consequences in jail.  This fear lingered until my surgery was complete.

As for concepts like "stealth" or "passing," I never viewed myself as acting, deceiving, or lying about who I am.  I've always just been me.  Even when speaking about my past, I refer to myself confidently.  For example, saying, "When I was a little girl" or when asked questions like, "Have you ever been known by another name (forms)?" I simply reply, "No."

Knowing that the worst case scenario might be jail, I remain unbothered and continue to live my life regardless.  If people find out or claim my account of the past is wrong, I will deal with this situation accordingly.  I choose not to let it bother me or to put it another way, I'm not stressed out by it.

By choosing silence about certain aspects of my past, I've avoided countless potential consequences, from uncomfortable questions to judgement or discrimination.  This decision has allowed me to focus on living my life and sidestep situations, avoided issues or inhibitors that could have brought unnecessary complications.

Through this approach, I've learned to navigate challenges with resilience and found peace in simply being myself.

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator

Quote from: Paulie on December 01, 2024, 12:35:48 AMThe "toughest on going thing" now, is that my breast have stopped hurting.  That most likely means that they are no longer growing and I'm not where I wan't to be yet.  I know that breast growth can go in spurts, so I still have hope.  This weighs on me daily. 

Paulie.

Paulie, that breast growth must be associated with pain is a myth. You can have pain with no growth, and growth with no pain, so please don't lose any sleep over it. So long as your estrogen is dominant, you will get whatever you are capable of getting.

Hugs,

Allie

Quote from: Allie Jayne on December 01, 2024, 09:24:48 PMPaulie, that breast growth must be associated with pain is a myth. You can have pain with no growth, and growth with no pain, so please don't lose any sleep over it. So long as your estrogen is dominant, you will get whatever you are capable of getting.

Hugs,

Allie

That's a good point, Allie. They change size for many reasons, not just hormones. Water retention or dehydration, weight gain or loss, etc.

@Paulie
Dear Paulie:
Please listen to the advice regarding breast size that was just posted in the replies by:
    @Allie Jayne  @big kim  @Sarah B  @Lori Dee

HUGS, Danielle

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on December 02, 2024, 12:57:24 AM@Paulie
Dear Paulie:
Please listen to the advice regarding breast size that was just posted in the replies by:
    @Allie Jayne  @big kim  @Sarah B  @Lori Dee

HUGS, Danielle

Thank you to everyone for the advice/encouragement.

My breasts had been tender for a good 12+ months and the growth and been slow but steady during that same time period.  I just assumed, that's the way it worked.  Especially since I haven't notice any change since the pain subsided.

I already have my lab slip and I'll have the blood work done later this week or next.  I'm due for my next check in towards the end of this month.  Hopefully my estrogen is still where it needs to be.

Paulie.

The hardest thing is that as my transition goes on me being transgender only ever comes up in dealing with my work. So while I'm accepted as a woman more and more throughout society, it feels as though I will never escape the label of being the transgender teacher. Kind of annoying.

Quote from: Nadine Spirit on December 02, 2024, 09:46:08 PMThe hardest thing is that as my transition goes on me being transgender only ever comes up in dealing with my work. So while I'm accepted as a woman more and more throughout society, it feels as though I will never escape the label of being the transgender teacher. Kind of annoying.

Kelly,

I realize this can be annoying.  Not sure on how to remove that label. 
It may simply be something that is persistent and annoying. 

Chrissy

I wish my voice was unmistakably female sounding.

Some famous transgender MTFs have rather male sounding voices so I am not alone.

I suppose this voice and speaking difference is another way humans were made, it is part of our genes.

Drats!


Chrissy

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on December 04, 2024, 08:21:45 PMDrats!

My sentiments exactly.

The toughest on going thing? Acceptance from one of my sisters.

This is the sister that when I was down there one time I got dragged into a therapy session with the whole family and she told me I was ruining her life because she didn't think anyone would marry her if she had a trans person as a brother.

When she was getting married she invited my youngest sister into the bridal party but she didn't invite me. I got the regular invitation. I asked her why and she said very hurtful things so I refused to go.

When I was visiting my parents for Christmas I remember meeting her husband for the first time.

My mom asked me not to wear a dress before I got there so I wouldn't upset my sister. So what did I do? I showed up in my Victoria Secret purple strapless dress a matching heels to accent my ankles with my hair in a French Twist. I figured screw my sister. This dress has always been a favorite of mine because it gives a nice view of cleavage and with the right pushed bra looks amazing.

I got her husbands attention right away and was as girly as possible before my sister was in the house. He didn't even know who I was but he was and assumed I was a friend of the family visiting. I was still mad about being snubbed by them. When my Mom introduced him to me formally and he realized who I was he looked at my high school photo of me in my uniform from NJROTC and the switch flipped. It didn't matter that I pass visually and have a feminine voice. I hate that damn photo! But at least there it was no hiding it and acting all polite while making snide comments behind my back anymore.

Thankfully I don't  live in Georgia and I am stealth so I mostly just deal with glass ceiling and mansplaining issues but it sucks going down to visit my parents and having to act like I don't hate my sisters guts around my parents.

My sisters in laws are more accepting although the probing questions for a few hours when we first met. Did you have surgery on the face? No. How is that possible you look like a girl? How are you speaking like a girl? Don't still have your ... well you know?

It really made me feel like a lab rat but it ended with one of them saying you're not at all what I expected. When I asked what she expected she said a guy in a dress with a 5 o'clock shadow strutting around. Clearly my sister had done nothing to actually help me before hand.

Okay, I have 2:

First, was coming out to my wife (CIS,F) Her initial response was shock, then a total meltdown, the "I married a man, not a woman" response. We went through a couple months of silence about it, then one day she asked me to show her all the items I had purchased, clothing, shoes, makeup, etc. She got into therapy (I was already going) and we gradually got to the point where we could talk about "it." Me going on Estrogen begin to make a difference. My anger, anxiety began to fade and my general temperament improved dramatically. Fast forward a year, our marriage is in the best place it has been in years. She has encouraged me to find a trans support group, and this week told me, "I'm so happy for you that you have found and embraced who you are inside." We hugged and both cried.

My second most difficult event was a couple of months ago going to the dermatologist for my semi-annual skin check up. I had been on hormones for a year, and had developed nice B+ cup breasts. All went well when the nurse called me in, until she handed me the gown and said, "you know the drill, open in the back and everything off but your underwear. I took the gown, and thought, Oh, 💩!!! No one other than my wife had seen me topless in over a year. I took the gown, stripped to the bare minimum, and sat down thinking what I would tell the female PA when she came in. When she did, I told her, I was a little embarrassed as my chest had grown, and she didn't miss a beat, "Oh, you have gynacomastia, it's pretty common. I blurted out, "Yes, yes, that's it!" And then, "I'm transgender and on estrogen!" She didn't respond at all, continued with the exam and when she came around to check my chest out, put her hand on my shoulder, told me it was okay, just to relax. She continued the exam, a bit more gingerly than usual, when she finished, she patted me on the back, smiled and said, "it's all going to be okay." Professional and caring, reassuring and nonjudgmental. She turned what could have been hurtful and painful in to validation.

Quote from: LisaJenn on December 06, 2024, 06:14:12 PMMy second most difficult event was a couple of months ago going to the dermatologist for my semi-annual skin check up. I had been on hormones for a year, and had developed nice B+ cup breasts. All went well when the nurse called me in, until she handed me the gown and said, "you know the drill, open in the back and everything off but your underwear. I took the gown, and thought, Oh, 💩!!! No one other than my wife had seen me topless in over a year. I took the gown, stripped to the bare minimum, and sat down thinking what I would tell the female PA when she came in. When she did, I told her, I was a little embarrassed as my chest had grown, and she didn't miss a beat, "Oh, you have gynacomastia, it's pretty common. I blurted out, "Yes, yes, that's it!" And then, "I'm transgender and on estrogen!" She didn't respond at all, continued with the exam and when she came around to check my chest out, put her hand on my shoulder, told me it was okay, just to relax. She continued the exam, a bit more gingerly than usual, when she finished, she patted me on the back, smiled and said, "it's all going to be okay." Professional and caring, reassuring and nonjudgmental. She turned what could have been hurtful and painful in to validation.

Oh wow. It's so great that you and your wife have managed to stay together and she is supportive. That is rare.

I don't know if I would have been able to keep seeing the same doctor while transitioning. You have bravery and tenacity. I'm glad it worked out.

Getting started with electrolysis for my face, constant back and forth yes, no, yes, no debates with my male side.

His argument is that I'll be just fine with temporarily hair removal methods.

Exhausting, but so far I've been winning this internal struggle in other areas.

I need this done because I am ready to go out fully dressed as Lilis in a elegant, knee high, black pencil dress.

Away with him, already 😝

Quote from: NatalieRene on December 06, 2024, 06:54:31 PMOh wow. It's so great that you and your wife have managed to stay together and she is supportive. That is rare.

I don't know if I would have been able to keep seeing the same doctor while transitioning. You have bravery and tenacity. I'm glad it worked out.

-I have to say, that being on hormones made such a difference in me. I have combat related PTSD, and E did more for me than any med did. My wife realized I was the same person inside I have always been, just a new and improved version! 😎 We both realized how deep our love is. 💜

- I've been seeing this PA at my Derm for almost 10 years. We're both distance runners and talk a lot about the ups and downs of training, and have seen each other at a lot of local races. There's always been an 'attraction tension' between us, but we both respect the boundaries, so I didn't have a second thought about seeing her. Of course I never thought about totally disrobing when I went to see her! 🤗 I'm MUCH more comfortable with female providers. My Primary Care doc (Fem)is very accepting, also.