Re: Gay vs Straight ?

We could be all classed as both. If we are born genetically male and transition we are technically gay if we live with a guy. If we are born genetically male and transition and find a girlfriend we are technically straight?  but at the same time we could be seen as a lesbian.... and at the same time if we are with a man we could be seen as straight on first appearance...

Well, personally, I went through a time where I wasn't sure and was bi -- I'd say now I'm more so on the lesbian side. Although, from time to time, I might find  a guy attractive, relationships and sexual stuff doesn't seem to work/fit when I'm with men. I do not know if the sexual part will change after surgery, because I've heard that for some people it does.

Personally, I just think of myself as myself, and if I fall in love with someone, regardless of gender, I'm fine with that. I tend to be mostly attracted to women, but not girly-girly women. The men that I sometimes feel an attraction to are a bit on the fem side. And again, attraction vs an actual relationship and sexual encounter is different.

I've been with both, including other trans people, and for me being with another woman seems to feel more comfortable. Also, hanging out with lesbians I seem to be pretty comfortable, too, and I feel that I'm being more myself. I'm girlish, but not high fem. I usually don't wear skirts/dresses unless it's an occasion. I don't always wear make up (these days, make up is almost an occasion), and sometimes I'm a bit tomboyish. So, a lot like the other lesbians I know. And I'm find with that.  

--natalie

Quote from: Berliegh on April 28, 2008, 05:59:30 AM
Re: Gay vs Straight ?

We could be all classed as both. If we are born genetically male and transition we are technically gay if we live with a guy. If we are born genetically male and transition and find a girlfriend we are technically straight?  but at the same time we could be seen as a lesbian.... and at the same time if we are with a man we could be seen as straight on first appearance...

is that how you determine [your] sexual preference based on [your] gender identity? great! have a ball at it but fyi a mtf transsexual has a female gender identification.  consequently, if she likes women sexually, she's considered lesbian.  if she prefers boys, she's straight. capiche?

Quote from: Berliegh on April 28, 2008, 05:59:30 AMIf we are born genetically male and transition we are technically gay if we live with a guy. If we are born genetically male and transition and find a girlfriend we are technically straight? 

Are you saying MTF transsexuals, after transitioning, are still men? No. That's just wrong. That's what our enemies say about us.

Re: Gay vs Straight

We are all both...

If a man changes gender and then married a man she is still termed as gay. If a man changes gender and has a woman as a partner, she is termed as straight. But she could also be seen as a lesbian and therefor be seen as gay....

Quote from: Berliegh on April 29, 2008, 01:01:25 AM
Re: Gay vs Straight

We are all both...

If a man changes gender and then married a man she is still termed as gay. If a man changes gender and has a woman as a partner, she is termed as straight. But she could also be seen as a lesbian and therefor be seen as gay....

how exactly do you change "genders" berliegh?  did you change "your gender"? were you ever a man? or were you always female? funny.  i thought mtf transsexuals had an intrinsic female gender identification. but you know,  whatever floats your boat!   let's just try not to make blanket statements, k?

Quote from: Natasha on April 29, 2008, 01:10:19 AM

Quote from: Berliegh on April 29, 2008, 01:01:25 AM
Re: Gay vs Straight

We are all both...

If a man changes gender and then married a man she is still termed as gay. If a man changes gender and has a woman as a partner, she is termed as straight. But she could also be seen as a lesbian and therefor be seen as gay....

how exactly do you change "genders" berliegh?  did you change "your gender"? were you ever a man? or were you always female? funny.  i thought mtf transsexuals had an intrinsic female gender identification. but you know,  whatever floats your boat!   let's just try not to make blanket statements, k?

It was suposed to be tongue in cheek! It's not the way I see it at all but more the stereotype public perception of us in general. Your right it was nonsense..

It's true I didn't ever conform to a male lifestyle and didn't live that type of persona and from the age of 13 I started enhancing a female identity. I never felt male and even at school and at work I was never seen as male.....I don't have a before and after sinario...

I feel 65% female and 35% male
I feel 65% attracted to females and 35% to males

Does this makes sense?

Its how I sometimes try to explain it 

I guess iM a bit Bi

I used to identify as a totally 100% gay man. However, since then I've been actively pursuing a lovely girl so.. Bisexual male.

Hmm, thanks to everyone that has responded so far. Here are the results i've gotten as of today:
M2F respondents- 48
F2M respondents- 16

M2F Gay     -   31.25%
M2F Straight-  18.75%
M2F Bisexual-  50%

F2M Gay     -   31.25%
F2M Straight-   18.75%
F2M Bisexual-   50%

I know that the numbers look weird, but I checked them twice. You guys just happened to respond in the perfect correlation of numbers. Doubt I will ever see that again in a number series.

Anyways, what do yall think? I think thus far it blows the old numbers away, but I can think of a few reasons for the numbers being as they are. Do you agree or disagree with the numbers?

Well, I'd always heard that about 90% of ftms are straight. But that's not reflected here.
I love that most our ftms are fellow bi-guys! 

I agree with the numbers. People are more open minded about sexuality these days, and a lot of people are recognizing that gender identity and sexual orientation are not one in the same, and it's perfectly acceptable to be attracted to the gender you identify as.

Of course I also think a lot of people 'change' how they feel about the opposite gender (ie: the gender they genetically are) after transition.

Think of it this way, born, genetically, as a female, I resented females because I was being forced to be one, and I hated everything female about myself, and thus hated females in general. After I transitioned I was able to think more rationally about it because I no longer considered myself a female and no longer possessed physical female traits (with below the waist being an exception).

I don't know if that applies to others, but it certainly seems to happen a lot...people seem to become more open (on a romantic level) to partners of their genetic gender after they've transitioned.

Quote from: discarded on April 30, 2008, 04:04:30 AMThink of it this way, born, genetically, as a female, I resented females because I was being forced to be one, and I hated everything female about myself, and thus hated females in general. After I transitioned I was able to think more rationally about it because I no longer considered myself a female and no longer possessed physical female traits (with below the waist being an exception).

That's a very good point, I used to feel the same bitter hatred and resentment around being male, and now that I've transitioned, I feel able to relax about it (finally!). So bisexuality has come to seem natural to me.

Quotepeople seem to become more open (on a romantic level) to partners of their genetic gender after they've transitioned.

Yeah, I have to wonder about all the strictly monosexual (gay or straight) people here. Why restrict yourself to loving people of only one gender? People are individuals, why not love the person for their unique individual qualities rather than the gender?

Quote from: Hypatia on April 30, 2008, 01:50:08 PM
Yeah, I have to wonder about all the strictly monosexual (gay or straight) people here. Why restrict yourself to loving people of only one gender? People are individuals, why not love the person for their unique individual qualities rather than the gender?

I think it boils down to physical attraction and whether someone likes male or female 'parts'...because personalities are so varied and you can find a feminine guy, feminine girl, butch guy, and butch girl. And you can find traits (non physical) in either gender, so really it boils down to what you're physically attracted to---male characteristics, or female. Of course this applies to people who identify as strictly gay or straight. It just makes sense that, for example, a straight male would be 'open' to any kind of personality in a girl, provided she had 'girl parts', because he wouldn't be sexually attracted to 'male parts' (his own being an exception, of course. heh).

If u like girls u like girls.  if u like dudes u like dudes.  if u like both good 4 u   I only like girls.  I like soft skin.  A girls shape. a girls face & touch.  breasts. Nice long hair & everythin else girls got Never been w/a dude & its gonna stay that way. dudes aint 4 me.

Quote from: Chris on May 01, 2008, 02:03:57 AM
If u like girls u like girls.  if u like dudes u like dudes.  if u like both good 4 u   I only like girls.  I like soft skin.  A girls shape. a girls face & touch.  breasts. Nice long hair & everythin else girls got Never been w/a dude & its gonna stay that way. dudes aint 4 me.

I have to say ditto to what Chris said.  Happy with my g/f and never been with a guy and never plan to.  First time I ever went on a date just as a test, I felt pretty sick.  Good thing it was only to a movie.  Anyway, I am happy with who I am and being straight, so not gonna change.

It seems I'm getting in on the end of this poll but what the heck...

I'm a 100% heterosexual female.  I guess it's a bit of a conundrum!  Prior to finally realizing who and what I was, I lived the life of a heterosexual male, and often thought that my feelings towards men meant that I was either Bi or Gay.  Of course now the truth is reveled and in fact I am hetro female so my attraction to the male species was and is quite normal.

Steph

Quote from: Natasha on April 29, 2008, 01:10:19 AM

how exactly do you change "genders"...?

In the same manner some people "choose" their sexual orientation.   



tink

Quote from: Steph on May 01, 2008, 06:24:49 PM
I'm a 100% heterosexual female. 

Steph

So am I.

I am 100% heterosexual as well. 
I am choosing not to date until after SRS.  I really am trying to go through this process with as little complications as possible.

~Brenda