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Lilis Unveiled

Started by Lilis, December 30, 2024, 04:58:18 PM

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Mrs. Oliphant

They are all so elegant, Lilis. Full of grace and beauty. I was leaning towards number 2, but I learned long ago to never question the judgment Lori, Ash, or Lauren. BTW, this isn't future talk--it's who you already are and have always been.
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Lilis

Quote from: Mrs. Oliphant on April 11, 2025, 05:16:24 PMBTW, this isn't future talk--it's who you already are and have always been.
It was fun tapping into the future for a moment, but this journey isn't linear. There will be unforeseen obstacles along the way that I'll need to face and overcome.

As much as I enjoyed it, it's time to refocus and ground myself in where I am right now in my transition.

Thanks for joining me on that little detour, Annika.


~ Lilis 🫂
More about me:
Emerging from Darkness  ✨ | GAHT - 6/10/2024. ⚕️ | Electrolysis - 2/23/2025 ⚡| Progesterone - 3/24/2025 ⚕️ | Body laser - 3/26/2025 👙

"I'm still exploring what it means to be me". 💭

Mrs. Oliphant

Quote from: Lilis on April 11, 2025, 05:37:35 PMThanks for joining me on that little detour, Annika.
The pleasure was mine, Lilis. So, what step is next on your way to door #3? 
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Emma1017



OK, I'm really late to this party, but for what it is worth, I absolutely agree that #3 is a winner, Lilis!

Your therapist is right, regardless of our age, when we transition, we go through the pre-puberty/puberty stages. I like the fact that at one stage, we become teenage girls with credit cards.  The cosmetic counters love us!


Mrs. Oliphant

Quote from: Lilis on April 11, 2025, 05:37:35 PMThanks for joining me on that little detour, Annika.
Speaking of non sequiturs, and assuming Taylor Swift wasn't performing at Carnegie Hall, what is your favorite composition and who is your favorite composer? My favorites are Fur Elise (though Beethoven is nowhere near the top of my list of composers) and Fanny Mendelssohn (especially Hiob Cantata). As far as classical performers go, Maria Duenas (but that's mostly because she is your avatar's doppelganger). I miss my ears, Lilis. Sometimes, I would rather be blind that tone deaf.
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    The following users thanked this post: tgirlamg, Lilis, Sarah B

Sephirah

Sorry for poking my nose in. I'm not really a classical girl, but my favourite composer is probably Carl Orff, simply for this. Gives me goosebumps.

Natura nihil frustra facit.

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." ~ Buddha.

If you're dealing with self esteem issues, maybe click here. There may be something you find useful. :)
Above all... remember: you are beautiful, you are valuable, and you have a shining spark of magnificence within you. Don't let anyone take that from you. Embrace who you are. <3

tgirlamg

Quote from: Sephirah on April 12, 2025, 04:40:37 PMSorry for poking my nose in. I'm not really a classical girl, but my favourite composer is probably Carl Orff, simply for this. Gives me goosebumps.



I always loved the way they used Carl Orff's "Gassenhauer" (Street Song) as the opening for the Terrence Malick film Badlands...



What a great movie as are most of Malik's films although I am still trying to figure out the ending or Tree Of Life 🤔?

Onward!

Ashley 💕

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment" ... Ralph Waldo Emerson 🌸

"The individual has always had to struggle from being overwhelmed by the tribe... But, no price is too high for the privilege of owning yourself" ... Rudyard Kipling 🌸

Let go of the things that no longer serve you... Let go of the pretense of the false persona, it is not you... Let go of the armor that you have worn for a lifetime, to serve the expectations of others and, to protect the woman inside... She needs protection no longer.... She is tired of hiding and more courageous than you know... Let her prove that to you....Let her step out of the dark and feel the light upon her face.... amg🌸

Ashley's Corner: https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247549.0.html 🌻

Sephirah

I feel like I really need to watch more movies, lol. Ashley, lady of culture. <3
Natura nihil frustra facit.

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." ~ Buddha.

If you're dealing with self esteem issues, maybe click here. There may be something you find useful. :)
Above all... remember: you are beautiful, you are valuable, and you have a shining spark of magnificence within you. Don't let anyone take that from you. Embrace who you are. <3

Mrs. Oliphant

Quote from: Sephirah on April 12, 2025, 05:32:58 PMAshley, lady of culture.
Quote from: tgirlamg on April 12, 2025, 05:14:06 PMAshley 💕
Amazing! I can quote two people at the same time. Eat your heart out, Fox News. Bad news for Fanny, though. Carl just replaced her at the top of my list.
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Lilis

Quote from: Emma1017 on April 12, 2025, 08:21:36 AMOK, I'm really late to this party, but for what it is worth, I absolutely agree that #3 is a winner, Lilis!
Thanks Emma!

And, by the way, your profile picture looks great, you look radiant. 💗

Quote from: Emma1017 on April 12, 2025, 08:21:36 AMI like the fact that at one stage, we become teenage girls with credit cards.  The cosmetic counters love us!
Hahaha, hopefully one day that'll be me too!  ;D
More about me:
Emerging from Darkness  ✨ | GAHT - 6/10/2024. ⚕️ | Electrolysis - 2/23/2025 ⚡| Progesterone - 3/24/2025 ⚕️ | Body laser - 3/26/2025 👙

"I'm still exploring what it means to be me". 💭
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    The following users thanked this post: Sarah B

Lilis

Quote from: Mrs. Oliphant on April 12, 2025, 02:41:14 PMwhat is your favorite composition and who is your favorite composer? My favorites are Fur Elise (though Beethoven is nowhere near the top of my list of composers) and Fanny Mendelssohn (especially Hiob Cantata). As far as classical performers go, Maria Duenas (but that's mostly because she is your avatar's doppelganger).
That's so beautifully said, Annika. I actually went to Carnegie Hall because a friend invited me, I wish I could say I knew anything about classical music, but it's all still new to me. I'm more of a curious guest in that world than a true listener... for now.  ;D
More about me:
Emerging from Darkness  ✨ | GAHT - 6/10/2024. ⚕️ | Electrolysis - 2/23/2025 ⚡| Progesterone - 3/24/2025 ⚕️ | Body laser - 3/26/2025 👙

"I'm still exploring what it means to be me". 💭

Mrs. Oliphant

Quote from: Lilis on April 12, 2025, 08:18:33 PMI'm more of a curious guest in that world than a true listener
I'm not an afficionado, Lilis, and was raised on a diet of old country and old rock. But I ventured into the world of classical music about a decade ago and was blown away. Because of my severe hearing loss, I need to turn up the volume so loud it might as well be rock and roll. The songs just tend to last a bit longer.
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Mrs. Oliphant

Quote from: Lilis on April 12, 2025, 08:18:33 PMI actually went to Carnegie Hall because a friend invited me, I wish I could say I knew anything about classical music, but it's all still new to me.
Good morning, Lilis--Decided to take a trip through Lilis Unveiled for the third time. It's a beautiful journey and I am surprised how much more I discover that I didn't know enough to see on previous journeys. Your passages on spirituality affect me deeply and I share your understanding of the Divine while embracing the value of all perspectives. Accepting of course the 'seeker' is sincerely searching for the Good, the True, and the Beautiful and not attempting to define those terms for the rest of us. Please reveal more about your spiritual journey. Following your path is part of mine.

Lilis

Quote from: Mrs. Oliphant on April 17, 2025, 08:43:10 AMYour passages on spirituality affect me deeply and I share your understanding of the Divine while embracing the value of all perspectives.
Hey Annika,

Thank you so much for this beautiful message.

Your words touched me deeply. To know that my journey resonated with you enough to revisit it more than once is humbling.

I often feel like I'm simply fumbling my way through mystery, grace, and growth, trying to honor the Divine as I understand it.

I'll gladly share more of my spiritual path as it continues to unfold toward its own destiny.

It's not a straight road, but it's one I walk with reverence, with questions in hand and love in my heart.

Thank you again for honoring my story and for the gift of your presence.


With warmth,

~ Lilis 💗
More about me:
Emerging from Darkness  ✨ | GAHT - 6/10/2024. ⚕️ | Electrolysis - 2/23/2025 ⚡| Progesterone - 3/24/2025 ⚕️ | Body laser - 3/26/2025 👙

"I'm still exploring what it means to be me". 💭

Mrs. Oliphant

Quote from: Lilis on April 17, 2025, 08:49:19 PMThank you again for honoring my story and for the gift of your presence.
Your image of unveiling your face in order for God to see you (Corinthians?) was haunting. Reminded me of C.S. Lewis 'Til We have Faces.' Beholding the Divine may not be possible. But being beheld is more than adequate. Your unveiled face is beautiful, Lilis. As for me, I'm still trying to remove the masks I hide behind. But the world sees us more clearly now. We look much like ourselves. Or soon will. I am blessed you shared your face with me. 

Lilis

Quote from: Mrs. Oliphant on April 17, 2025, 09:16:53 PMYour image of unveiling your face in order for God to see you (Corinthians?) was haunting. Reminded me of C.S. Lewis 'Til We have Faces.'
Yes! 2 Corinthians 3:18 was precisely what I had in mind. That moment of unveiling isn't just about God seeing me; it's about finally seeing myself.

QuoteYour unveiled face is beautiful, Lilis.
Thank You! 💗

I do look and feel more like myself now, And soon, soon enough, I'll see my reflections, shadows, and recognize them as truth, not longing.

QuoteAs for me, I'm still trying to remove the masks I hide behind.
For me, the unmasking began when I allowed myself to be honest, open, willing, and vulnerable with my gender therapist.

Many of us begin our journey in that space, and it's where real transformation often starts. Don't forget to lean into that support, your gender therapist can be a vital guide as you continue uncovering your true self.

QuoteI am blessed you shared your face with me.
If I were a deity, I might accept your praises, but I'm not.

Still, thank you sincerely for your kind attention.

That said, no more praises, please.

You have your own journey to focus on now.

Wishing you all the best as you walk your path.


~ Lilis 🫂
More about me:
Emerging from Darkness  ✨ | GAHT - 6/10/2024. ⚕️ | Electrolysis - 2/23/2025 ⚡| Progesterone - 3/24/2025 ⚕️ | Body laser - 3/26/2025 👙

"I'm still exploring what it means to be me". 💭

Mrs. Oliphant

Quote from: Lilis on April 18, 2025, 04:38:59 PMIf I were a deity, I might accept your praises, but I'm not.
Too funny! I must confess, that particular line stuck in my craw but, by then, I had already hit the 'post' button. Someday, I hope an 'unpost' button is added to Susan's. What I meant to say... well, never mind. When you're in a hole, the best thing to do...

Lilis

My Perspective on the Global Rise of Gender-Critical Movements

When the Ground Shifted Beneath Me

When I began my transition, I expected the challenges that come with personal transformation: understanding my identity, navigating health care, and adjusting to a new social landscape. What I didn't expect was how global politics would crash into that journey like a wave, especially after the defeat of the Democratic Party in the 2024 U.S. elections.

Since the defeat of the Democratic Party in the 2024 U.S. elections, life as a transgender woman has changed rapidly and harshly. I've seen rights that once felt secure begin to erode, even in states considered "safe."

As a transgender woman living in the United States, I've felt a seismic shift since that election. Laws and protections that once offered at least a measure of safety and dignity are being rapidly rolled back. In some states, gender-affirming care has vanished. Teachers are threatened with punishment for acknowledging trans students. Some of us have even begun to consider the need for internal asylum, relocating to "blue" states like California and New York, which are now among the few places offering relative refuge.

But even there, the federal government casts a long shadow. State protections can be overridden or ignored when federal agencies adopt policies hostile to trans people.

We live with a growing fear: that no state may ultimately be safe if the federal agenda continues in this direction.

And it's not just happening in the United States.

I was surprised to learn that similar tensions are playing out in other countries, though not always in the same political frame. Take the United Kingdom, for example. There, a powerful and highly visible gender-critical movement insists that legal recognition of trans people threatens the rights of cisgender women. Unlike in the U.S., this movement isn't confined to the political right; many of its most vocal supporters identify as progressive or feminist.

In the UK, the term "gender-critical" is often used to describe a viewpoint that asserts "biological sex" should be the primary or sole determinant in law and policy. This movement has gained mainstream media traction, and it has influenced court decisions and legislative proposals. Even existing laws, like the Gender Recognition Act 2004, are being reinterpreted in ways that cast doubt on the legal status of transgender women like me.

Contrast that with the U.S., where the most aggressive attacks on trans rights come from far-right religious and political groups. Their tactics are more overtly hostile centered on demonizing trans people, particularly trans youth, and erasing our existence through law.

Both countries, and others like Germany, Australia, and some Nordic nations, are wrestling with these issues, but with different cultural and political scripts. What they have in common, however, is an increasing resistance to the very idea that trans people deserve to live openly and safely.

This is not just a local or national struggle. It's a global one. And the ground is shifting fast.

As someone just trying to live truthfully and with integrity, I didn't think I'd need to understand geopolitics or legal battles across oceans.

But here I am, learning that the personal really is political, and that our identities are being legislated, debated, and too often invalidated not just where we live, but everywhere.

What Is the UK's Gender-Critical Movement?

In the UK, "gender-critical" is a label embraced by individuals who argue that legal and social recognition of transgender identities should never override so-called "biological sex." They often position themselves as defenders of women's rights, especially in spaces like bathrooms, prisons, and sports.

This movement has gained surprising legitimacy, supported by celebrities like J.K. Rowling and even some left-leaning feminists. Unlike in the U.S., where anti-trans rhetoric is mostly rooted in far-right politics, the UK's gender-critical voice is more mainstream and sometimes crosses traditional political lines.

This makes it even harder to challenge, and more dangerous in its normalization.

As someone who identifies as a trans woman, it's jarring to see how these ideologies play out not just in law, but in everyday attitudes, even from those who claim to be progressive.

What's Happening in the U.S.?

Here in America, the backlash looks different, but it's no less intense. Since the Republican victory in 2024, we've witnessed a cascade of state-level legislation targeting trans people. Gender-affirming care has been restricted or outright banned in many areas, IDs are being flagged, and even our historical contributions are being erased from public records.

The movement here isn't just about discomfort with gender diversity, it's part of a larger culture war, often fueled by religious conservatism, misinformation, and fear. The political divide is stark. While the Democratic Party generally supports trans rights, Republican lawmakers are introducing wave after wave of anti-trans bills.

And yet, despite the different tone, both the UK and U.S. are making it harder, and scarier, for people like me to live openly and safely.

What About Other Countries?

The UK and U.S. aren't alone in this struggle.

Around the world:

Canada remains relatively progressive, though there are pockets of resistance.

Germany has passed new gender self-ID laws but still faces conservative backlash.

Nordic countries, once considered models of inclusion, are now reassessing access to trans healthcare for youth.

Australia and New Zealand experience similar debates, though generally with less intensity.

The struggle is global, and it's deeply personal.

Why This Matters

When people debate our right to exist, it's not just political, it's existential. I've faced the internal struggles of self-discovery, the bravery of coming out, the emotional labor of building a new life in my truth. But these movements, gender-critical in the UK, anti-trans in the U.S., try to rewrite the narrative. They attempt to cast our identities as threats, our presence as a problem.

The truth is, I'm not a threat. I'm a human being doing her best to heal, grow, and contribute to a better world.

And I'm not alone.

We are witnessing a global backlash, but also a global awakening.

And in that awakening, there is hope. People are resisting, building community, and telling the truth about our lives.

Final Thoughts

The more I learn, the more I realize that our fight is interconnected across borders. Whether you're in London, New York, Berlin, or anywhere else, trans people deserve dignity, safety, and recognition.

If you're trans, questioning, or an ally: you're not imagining the tension. You're not being "too sensitive." You're living in a world where our identities are being politicized and challenged in ways that demand both awareness and solidarity.

And yet we continue. We breathe, we hope, we transition, we speak, and we love.

Because our truth is not a debate.

About the Author

By Lilis 💗

Lilis is a trans woman, self-diagnosed intersex, and bisexual New Yorker who embraces her identity as both transgender and genderfluid. She is five years sober and lives her life rooted in spiritual faith, seeking to align with God's love through Christ. Lilis is passionate about healing personally and collectively, and feels called to help those navigating gender identity, addiction, mental health.
More about me:
Emerging from Darkness  ✨ | GAHT - 6/10/2024. ⚕️ | Electrolysis - 2/23/2025 ⚡| Progesterone - 3/24/2025 ⚕️ | Body laser - 3/26/2025 👙

"I'm still exploring what it means to be me". 💭

Lilis

I've been feeling kind of blah these past couple of days, just off.

A bit more crying spells than usual.

There's been some noticeable breast tenderness too, especially in the mornings when I first wake up and sit at the edge of my bed, trying to catch up with consciousness.

Sleep has been strange. It's felt more like a series of power naps throughout the day rather than any solid rest, usually around the times I take my estrogen doses.

I even being checking  for spotting in my panties between trips to the bathroom, but not a jot of blood.

So I guess it's not that. ☺️

Still, my body feels like it's moving through something, and I'm just trying to listen.

~ Lilis 💗
More about me:
Emerging from Darkness  ✨ | GAHT - 6/10/2024. ⚕️ | Electrolysis - 2/23/2025 ⚡| Progesterone - 3/24/2025 ⚕️ | Body laser - 3/26/2025 👙

"I'm still exploring what it means to be me". 💭

Northern Star Girl

@Lilis
Dear Lilis:
Now you have me worried for you.

Have your HRT dosages and meds been changed in the last few months?
When is the last time you had blood work done and reviewed by your doctor?

If this continues it might be a good plan to contact and/or make an appointment with your doctor.
Stay healthy and continue to stay on top of your health and feelings...
  ... and try to get some solid non-stop good night's sleep.

HUGS, Danielle
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I started HRT March 2015 and
I've been Full-Time since December 2016.
I love living in a small town in Alaska
I am 45 years old and Single

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