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Forced to Wear a Dress for Prom, how should I lower dysphoria?

Started by Adrian26, April 03, 2025, 01:11:58 PM

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Adrian26

April 03, 2025, 01:11:58 PM
I have to wear a dress for prom and while it's a beautiful dress, it just makes me feel so dysphoric in it. My chest is exposed and the slit makes my legs feel so feminine. I tried it on bc my mom wanted to make sure it fits and as I looked in the mirror all I saw was something I'm not. I felt like all the soul-searching I did to figure out who I was didn't mean anything because at the end of the day I'm female to everyone around me. Even just writing about it and reliving it makes me feel dysphoric. I just need some help on how to feel like myself even just a little bit on prom night.
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

Lori Dee

#1
April 03, 2025, 01:45:26 PM
That is a dilemma. Forget about the dress and focus on what you can do. Don't wear makeup or jewelry. If your hair is long enough, pull it back into a ponytail or bun. Many members have said they get by through "underdressing" or wearing something underneath that suits them. You could wear a pair of boxers or boy briefs under the dress.

The key is to remember that they don't know your secret. They think you are a girl, but you fooled them. You are just another guy in a dress! It will be hard when they are treating you like a girl. Just smile because you know the truth. Do try to have fun with it.  :)
My Life is Based on a True Story
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete

Adrian26

#2
April 03, 2025, 02:24:41 PM
My mom's forcing me to wear heels and jewelry and have my hair and makeup done for the event as well. But I'll try your advice
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

Adrian26

#3
April 26, 2025, 10:13:42 AM
Well it's prom night. I am wearing a dress and getting my hair and makeup done. I already got my nails done. I feel an odd calm. It's kinda funny to me that imma be a guy in a dress. I'll just enjoy myself and internally laugh that my guy friend is gonna be drooling over a dude in a dress
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

Lori Dee

#4
April 26, 2025, 12:57:23 PM
Quote from: Adrian26 on April 26, 2025, 10:13:42 AMWell it's prom night. I am wearing a dress and getting my hair and makeup done. I already got my nails done. I feel an odd calm. It's kinda funny to me that imma be a guy in a dress. I'll just enjoy myself and internally laugh that my guy friend is gonna be drooling over a dude in a dress

That's the spirit! Have fun with it. I never went to prom, so enjoy yourself.
My Life is Based on a True Story
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete

Adrian26

#5
April 26, 2025, 02:37:45 PM
Quote from: Lori Dee on April 26, 2025, 12:57:23 PMThat's the spirit! Have fun with it. I never went to prom, so enjoy yourself.
I will! Update on how it goes
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

ChrissyRyan

#6
April 26, 2025, 02:39:22 PM
Have a fun time.

Chrissy
Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 

Adrian26

#7
April 26, 2025, 02:47:41 PM
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

Adrian26

#8
April 27, 2025, 08:26:20 AM
Omg, last night was awesome. I danced a lot and my date was really chill. Only not great part was that my ex was trying to hit on me the whole time and I kept internally howling with laughter at him, but other than that I had a super fun night.
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

ChrissyRyan

#9
April 27, 2025, 08:30:02 AM
Quote from: Adrian26 on April 27, 2025, 08:26:20 AMOmg, last night was awesome. I danced a lot and my date was really chill. Only not great part was that my ex was trying to hit on me the whole time and I kept internally howling with laughter at him, but other than that I had a super fun night.


That sounds like you enjoyed your prom.  Good for you!

Chrissy
Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 

Annaliese

#10
April 27, 2025, 08:38:21 AM
Quote from: Adrian26 on April 27, 2025, 08:26:20 AMOmg, last night was awesome. I danced a lot and my date was really chill. Only not great part was that my ex was trying to hit on me the whole time and I kept internally howling with laughter at him, but other than that I had a super fun night.
I am glad you had a good time. 😊 It is good to enjoy the moment knowing that you are being yourself inside. Even if no-one else knows. I'm glad you had an opportunity to do this and give yourself the opportunity to be able to get through this with out falling apart.🤗
Always  🏃 onward , there's no ⏳ to look  🔙. You are the person you were always meant to be.

Adrian26

#11
April 27, 2025, 09:04:07 AM
Quote from: Annaliese on April 27, 2025, 08:38:21 AMI am glad you had a good time. 😊 It is good to enjoy the moment knowing that you are being yourself inside. Even if no-one else knows. I'm glad you had an opportunity to do this and give yourself the opportunity to be able to get through this with out falling apart.🤗
Yeah, it was a really great night
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

Lori Dee

#12
April 27, 2025, 11:36:34 AM
That is wonderful, Adrian! I am glad you had a good time.

Remember how worried you were? Look at how strong you are! You did it and the world did not end.
I'm so proud of you.

Hugs!
My Life is Based on a True Story
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete

Adrian26

#13
April 27, 2025, 11:45:56 AM
Quote from: Lori Dee on April 27, 2025, 11:36:34 AMThat is wonderful, Adrian! I am glad you had a good time.

Remember how worried you were? Look at how strong you are! You did it and the world did not end.
I'm so proud of you.

Hugs!
Haha I guess you're right. Thanks!! I feel great, minus the feet pain
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

Annaliese

#14
Yesterday at 10:18:05 AM
Quote from: Adrian26 on April 27, 2025, 11:45:56 AMHaha I guess you're right. Thanks!! I feel great, minus the feet pain
How are you doing Adrian.  Hope you are doing well now that the pressure from the prom is gone. 🤗
Annaliese
Always  🏃 onward , there's no ⏳ to look  🔙. You are the person you were always meant to be.

Adrian26

#15
Yesterday at 10:24:16 AM
Quote from: Annaliese on Yesterday at 10:18:05 AMHow are you doing Adrian.  Hope you are doing well now that the pressure from the prom is gone. 🤗
Annaliese
Been better, but I'm still here and that's all I can ask for
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

Annaliese

#16
Yesterday at 10:26:09 AM
Quote from: Adrian26 on Yesterday at 10:24:16 AMBeen better, but I'm still here and that's all I can ask for
I agree, just know we are here. 🫂 🤗

Annaliese
Always  🏃 onward , there's no ⏳ to look  🔙. You are the person you were always meant to be.

Adrian26

#17
Yesterday at 10:29:22 AM
Quote from: Annaliese on Yesterday at 10:26:09 AMI agree, just know we are here. 🫂 🤗

Annaliese
Thanks
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.

Tig58072

#18
Yesterday at 10:12:43 PM
Just ditch the prom. I've never been to one and don't feel I've missed anything

Adrian26

#19
Today at 07:02:37 AM
Quote from: Tig58072 on Yesterday at 10:12:43 PMJust ditch the prom. I've never been to one and don't feel I've missed anything

Might do that next year or show up in jeans and a button up
Love who you love, do what you want, and live life to the fullest. They're gonna talk about you anyways so might as well make their conversation interesting. Live as yourself, not someone everyone else wants you to be.
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