Annika, congratulations 🥳🥳

Quote from: Alana Ashleigh on June 19, 2025, 01:10:03 PMAnnika, congratulations

Thanks, Alana! When the Wal-Mart pharmacist asked why I was prescribed Estradiol, I proudly stood my ground and said: gender affirming. Then, I went into the ladies section and picked out two dresses I paid for at non-self checkout. And all of this happened this morning in Butte, Montana. Who says drugs aren't empowering?

I guess I'm surprised they asked why, although pharmacists do need to think about the complexities of people's medications.

Good for you for being unafraid to say what's true for you. I'm proud to call you my sister.

Annika, I love Ponderosa pines (but I love almost every kind of tree). I planted a dozen a few years ago. They're not native here, though they do exist about 40 miles north. I figured with our summers getting hotter and drier all the time, I should try filling some of the gaps with a species that might do better in those extremes than some of our moisture-loving natives. A couple have passed to the great beyond, but the rest are doing quite well. It's the very wet fall, spring, and winter that I think may be their biggest challenge.

Quote from: Pema on June 19, 2025, 04:27:29 PMIt's the very wet fall, spring, and winter that I think may be their biggest challenge.

From what my daughter told me (she's the one with a degree in environmental horticulture, not me), Ponderosa pine are drought tolerant but not resistant (Douglas-fir was my first choice but the state nursery was sold out). From what I understand, they are taking over irrigated parts of eastern Montana (almost like an invasive weed). I'm not sure where you live, Pema, but if you can pack your bags (or pinecones in this case) and thrive in Roundup, Montana, you can adapt to just about anything.

Quote from: Dances With Trees on June 18, 2025, 06:03:00 PMThe forester stated: sir, it will take a thousand years for the trees to mature. To which the general replied: that's why you should have planted them yesterday.

There's a remarkable intro in one of the Meetings with Remarkable Trees series the BBC did (which is good). Somewhere in an intro, one of the interviewees points at a planting which was two centuries old and says, 'My great, great, great grandfather planted those. As a cash crop.'

Patience is a virtue.

"Trees are poems that the earth writes upon the sky." - Kahil Gibran



So proud of you, Anni. <3

Maybe it is just the day. There is so much going on in my life and it's hard to believe a tiny little patch changes things overnight. But I have shed more tears today than I have since my best friend died a few months ago. If this is what it means to 'transition', then I'm all in. Until today, I didn't realize I had forgotten how to feel.

Clarification: Bod died a few weeks ago (not months). Must be the patch.

Quote from: Dances With Trees on June 20, 2025, 05:35:23 PMMaybe it is just the day. There is so much going on in my life and it's hard to believe a tiny little patch changes things overnight. But I have shed more tears today than I have since my best friend died a few months ago. If this is what it means to 'transition', then I'm all in. Until today, I didn't realize I had forgotten how to feel.

Annika, I am an avid cryer, and I'm elated to have you join me. Know that you are loved, my sister.

Quote from: Dances With Trees on June 20, 2025, 05:35:23 PMMaybe it is just the day. There is so much going on in my life and it's hard to believe a tiny little patch changes things overnight. But I have shed more tears today than I have since my best friend died a few months ago. If this is what it means to 'transition', then I'm all in. Until today, I didn't realize I had forgotten how to feel.

Best wishes ... being a "cryer" .. like me as well, simply means you have the ability to empathize with others. That's very important, and means you're normal.

A mock orange fronted by a peony. Poor execution of landscaping design but the two seem happy together at least for now.  As Lee Ann Womack suggested, "I hope you dance."

It looks to me like they are dancing.

Sometimes I feel like landscape design is for people who like things manicured and just-so. (And sometimes I do have to recognize that things simply don't work where I've put them.) Just yesterday, I had to trim and wrangle and separate an absolutely massive double-flowered peony and a gigantic calla, both just loaded with blossoms. I'd constructed a cordon around them to try to keep them upright, but their combined weight had made a joke of my effort. I was telling my wife last night that they're both too large to be where they are, but both of them together are preposterous.

And yet... They're obviously very happy there, together. I have until October to figure out what I want to do about it.

I say let them dance.

I can't even remember the song title and I'm too hard of hearing to sort through a song list searching for a single line. Floor Jensen and Nightwish is all I remember. And the line goes something like this: How can I cry on someone's shoulder when the shoulder cries more than I?.
  I am blessed to be among so many empaths. And so many times you have heard my plea and excised my pain. And so many times it must have seemed as though you cast pearls before swine when you read my awkward and banal response to your words of love and kindness.
  Excising pain is similar to surgery and as soon as the anesthetic wears off, I go back and read your words and also my response. Often with embarrassment or worse, fearing my words might have been painful for you to read. And I wish I could change them, but even if I did delete them that might do little more than pour salt on the wound I inflicted. The bell has been rung, and I must abide the ensuing silence.
  It is small consolation, but if you look at me on this site when I am full of joy and so alive in the company of so many beautiful people, you might notice the pearl necklace so large it adorns my shoulders and bosom. You gave that gift to me. All of you gave it to me and asked nothing in return. Not even a proper thank you. But I assure, that necklace is my most cherished treasure.

Quote from: Pema on Yesterday at 03:07:35 PMI say let them dance.

I sometimes sense we are kindred spirits, Pema. I am more comfortable in the company of trees and flowers than in the company of men or even women. I am patient enough to watch trees dance even on a calm day and the moment my greenhouse explodes with color never fails to surprise me. We're Zone 4, borderline 5, so I don't think most lilies would do well here. But I would love to see a picture of your calla dancing with peonies.   

Quote from: Dances With Trees on Today at 11:47:08 AMI sometimes sense we are kindred spirits, Pema. I am more comfortable in the company of trees and flowers than in the company of men or even women. I am patient enough to watch trees dance even on a calm day and the moment my greenhouse explodes with color never fails to surprise me. We're Zone 4, borderline 5, so I don't think most lilies would do well here. But I would love to see a picture of your calla dancing with peonies. 

Annika, there is no doubt we are kindred spirits. You may recall that my initial name on this site was "flowers_and_trees." Plants are my family of origin.

Every year, I start my vegetables and many, many flowers indoors under lamps on a table I built for that purpose in 1994. And every time that first seed germinates, I am in awe. Every time. The same is true of the absurd growth of my garden from bare ground to a dense jungle with a riot of color - year after year. You'd think I'd get used to it, but it never ceases to fill me with wonder and joy.

I didn't want to flood your quasi-blog with images, but I did get a photo of the dancers and threw in a few others, too. Please take a look at them in my blog:

Calla and Peony for Annika (and more)

See also what I said there about growing lilies where you live. I think you have options.

Thank you for being you and loving the way you do.

Pema