Hello there.  I am a transman currently in my 40s, I have been living as a man since about 30, and have known I was some type of genderqueer since my teens.  A decade on testosterone has given me a thick bushy beard, and I am happy.

Not everything is perfect; there are nations (and states) that I can't visit, and I may have top surgery just so I can have better-fitting shirts, but overall I am happy and supported in the queer community, pass constantly in society at large (so have no concerns there), and have the gender-confirming face and body hair that I have always desired.

@V.as.in.Victor

Welcome to the Susan's Place Forum.  I am so very glad to see that you felt free to
register as a member here.

Other staff and regular members will be along soon to give you their welcomes and thoughts.

Warmly, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
  The Forum Administrator    Direct Email:  alaskandanielle@yahoo.com

Hello Victor

My name is Sarah and I would like to formally, Welcome you to Susan's Place!

Thank you for sharing your story.  It's wonderful to hear that you are living with the happiness and authenticity you always wanted and that you have found support in your community.  Having been on testosterone for a decade and giving you the beard you desired feels like such a powerful affirmation of who you are and I'm glad that it brings you peace.

Of course there are still challenges in the world, like travel restrictions or considering surgery for your comfort, but it's inspiring to see how you have built a life where joy and contentment outweigh those barriers.  The way you describe being at ease in society and having the face and body you always wanted is moving and it shows just how far you come.  I now what it feels like living the life you want for yourself.

I truly admire your honesty and resilience and I wish you continued happiness and strength on your path.  You deserve every bit of the peace you've found.

Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the Introductions Forum, of course.  I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new members

In addition members of Susan's will more than likely will discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as most have experienced these as well.

Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets.  Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.

Please review the links at the end of this message, especially the red links, they include information which will help you navigate the site and use the available features.  When you reach 15 posts, you will be able to send and reply to private messages and you will also be able to add an avatar to your profile, until then if you have any questions about the Susan's Place site and the Forums, please feel free to contact, the Forum Admin Danielle Northern Star Girl at alaskandanielle@yahoo.com or me at  SarahatSusans@proton.me

Take care and all the best for the future.

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Devlyn  @Jessica_Rose  @Mariah  @Northern Star Girl  @Lori Dee
@V.as.in.Victor

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Hey V.as.in.Victor,


Welcome to Susan's Place! 🩵


~ Lilis 🌷

Hi Victor,

Now is a great time to visit New England to see the fall foliage.  When I visited the Big E years ago they had a unisex bathroom for me to use. 
Provincetown Cape Cod is a popular tourist destination where nobody cares about your gender.

Unfortunately a lot of great seafood shacks close down around Labor Day.

Marion

Hey Victor, welcome!  It is good to see you here!

Hello, Victor!

Welcome to Susan's Place.

You are among friends here, so feel free to browse the forums and add your experiences as well. We all learn from the experiences of others.

If you need help with the forums, feel free to reach out to any of our Staff members. I think you will find that our members are very helpful too.

Welcome. We are happy to have you here.

Hi, Victor. Welcome and thanks for joining and introducing yourself.

I love hearing that you're feeling content within yourself and your life. That's wonderful.

I hope you'll return often and tell us more about your experiences. I'd love to hear more from transmen.

As for perfection... Well, there's always something to be improved. I'm glad you've got it inside.

With love,
Pema

@V.as.in.Victor

Victor, welcome to Susan's Place! It's wonderful to have you join our community.🫂

Your story really hits home, the feeling of knowing who you are from your teens, and then having the courage to live authentically since your 30s.

A decade on T has given you that thick, bushy beard 🧔🏻 you always wanted - that's fantastic! As for top surgery for better-fitting shirts - that's such a practical consideration that many don't think about, but comfort in our daily lives matters! Sometimes it's these everyday things that make the biggest difference. There's something so powerful about seeing yourself in the mirror 🪩 and finally recognizing the person you've always known you were. That positive body image is crucial for defeating dysphoria. When you have the face and body that affirm who you are, it changes everything about how you feel and can move through the world.

I appreciate your honesty about the challenges too. The travel restrictions and safety concerns are real issues our community faces, and it's frustrating that in 2025 we still have to think twice about which places we can safely visit.

What stands out most is your contentment — passing in society, being supported by the queer community, and having found that happiness🤸🏽you deserve. That joy 🥹 comes through in your words, and it's inspiring for others who might be earlier in their journey.

Thank you for joining us and sharing your experience. We have a growing community of trans men here, and your perspective and decade of experience living authentically will be valuable to them. I do hope you will serve as a role model for other trans men.

Feel free to explore the forums, share your insights, and ask any questions you might have.

Welcome home, Victor. We're glad you're here!
— Susan

Hi Victor,

Better fitting shirts can be at odds with passing as a guy.
Guys typically wear a shirt that is a size too large, from the female perspective of how a shirt should fit.
Women's shirts often have some spandex to allow them to fit snugly around their curves.
It may be hard for some women to get used to wearing such tightly fitting shirts.
It may be hard for some men to find appropriate clothes if they are smaller than most men.
Clothes meant for growing boys will fit poorly, as their arms are long compared to their body size.

Peter Manning sells clothes tailored for shorter men.
You may want to see if they have clothes for you.
There aren't many alternative in the USA. 
I tried Asian men's clothes they did not fit my feminine figure.

Marion