Sexuality Happens: ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s
by 'Essin Em
Saturday, July 12, 2008

QuoteI was wondering the other day...is the term "->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-" only for cisgender (people whose gender matches their assigned sex) people, or can it be used for trans people too?
[...]
Anyways, I was talking to my massage therapist while in Philly, and she said something about getting so frustrated about all these transguys that only ever dated/[slept with] other transguys. I hadn't really thought about it before, but it's a good point. I know lots of transguys that, whether by active choice or not, only go with other transguys. Which is fine. Lots of women are only with women, men are only with men.

But then doesn't that kind of make them "->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s" too? I mean, if they'll only get with people that are trans, then essentially, they're being ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s. Or maybe, we just need an orientation that's identity involves only being attracted to trans people, because women that only sleep with women has an identity (lesbian), men that sleep only with women has an identity (straight), and men that only get with men has an identity (gay). Note, I know that lots of these people might not identify as such, I'm just using the assumption that behavior = identity for the purpose of this post, although I'm aware this is not always the case.

I think this definition of a skirt ->-bleeped-<- works well for ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s as well.

Skirt ->-bleeped-<-
   
   1. A man who finds himself attracted to any member of the human race with two boobs and a happy fun spot. Often spends a majority of his pointless and lonely life chasing after such a member of the human race completely ignorant to the fact that they have no interest in him and would wish for him to rot in a ditch somewhere with a clown jumping up and down on his deflated testicles.   >

For me, ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- is someone who see's TS as objects for sex that they fancy
boobs and a penis. Its a kind of fetish. These guys in my experience are closeted
gays or bi's, which need plausible deniability...

Almost aways, the ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- will not see the TS as a woman, but are
happy that everyone else considers them a women.

The TS is approached BECAUSE they are a TS, not because of any other attribute.

That's why I'm weary of going anywhere where there's a risk of meeting them (llike
said gay, or alternative bart). I prefer initiating contact for that very reason, because
I know that if I'm the one pursuing, I won't fall on one of them (unless its very
accidentail).

I suspect that the reason trans-folk often end up with other trans-folk is simply the comfort level.  I'm sure it's nice not having to risk rejection when the person you're interested in discovers your "dirty little secret"; and it's nice not having to give the Trans-101 lecture even if the person is open-minded about the subject.  Plus, if you're hanging out in the community, you're much more likely to meet, and therefore hook up with other trans people.  On the other hand, there probably are genuine ->-bleeped-<--->-bleeped-<-s among us as well. 

Back when I was hanging out in the local trans community there was a particular individual who dated only transwomen.  One evening I was having a conversation with one of my friends about him.  Our consensus was that we would both feel more comfortable about him if he would just settle down with one girl and not show up with a different one every time we saw him.  This man was by any definition a ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-.

But on other hand, I have heard some people use the term to refer to anyone who likes to date transwomen.  I don't think that's fair.  There's nothing wrong with having that as a sexual preference, as long as you are respectful of the feelings of your partners.  And if someone who is attracted to transwomen were to settle down with me for a lifetime together, there would be no ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- in that relationship.

Well, I see myself as a ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-, cause I find transpeople hot.
I dont see them as sexual objects (cause to me sex isnt that interesting anyway).. I just find them sexier than cispeople. I dont know if any of you have seen it, but.. transpeople (not only TS, but TG, TV/CD, Androgyne etc) have a special look in their eyes. Like some sort of "realness" that cispeople dont.

Am I making any sense?

Quote from: Drik on July 12, 2008, 05:55:17 PM

I dont know if any of you have seen it, but.. transpeople (not only TS, but TG, TV/CD, Androgyne etc) have a special look in their eyes. Like some sort of "realness" that cispeople dont.

Am I making any sense?

That look that says: " I am who I am and happy at last!" ?

LLL&R

Maebh

Quote from: Maebh on July 12, 2008, 06:34:06 PM

Quote from: Drik on July 12, 2008, 05:55:17 PM

I dont know if any of you have seen it, but.. transpeople (not only TS, but TG, TV/CD, Androgyne etc) have a special look in their eyes. Like some sort of "realness" that cispeople dont.

Am I making any sense?

That look that says: " I am who I am and happy at last!" ?

LLL&R

Maebh

eeeeeexaaactly.
^__^ or "I am who I am and you cant stop me" ;p