Should Transgender(used as a blanket term) people move from a hostile area for safety or stay because how else is that community learn to accept TG people? OK I been thinking about this a little well because Tennessee  has been in the news a lot lately with violence against transgender people.

Also I'm a TS and feel that won't I completely pass as woman when the time comes to go full time. So this would this affect how you feel about staying in an area?

Anna

I voted to move -- It seems to me that lowering your risk of being on the receiving end of discrimination and violence is an important survival step.

But be advised moving is not without risk.  I spoke to a transwoman last evening who had moved to San Francisco.  Although the City's tolerance of transgender is legendary, she had been unemployed since arriving a few years ago, she said.  I thought she passed well, btw.

Karen

Quote from: Karen on July 27, 2008, 03:44:00 PM
I voted to move -- It seems to me that lowering your risk of being on the receiving end of discrimination and violence is an important survival step.

But be advised moving is not without risk.  I spoke to a transwoman last evening who had moved to San Francisco.  Although the City's tolerance of transgender is legendary, she had been unemployed since arriving a few years ago, she said.  I thought she passed well, btw.

Karen

I also voted to move.  There is a reason queer folk flock to major urban areas; there is community and tolerance.

For those coming to San Francisco the thing you need to understand is the labor market is highly competitive.  Our major industries are banking and finance, technology and bio-tech.  All require a high level of education.  The workforce here is highly educated also.  There are a dozen universities and institutes churning out new graduates every year.  If you don't have skills or a lot of ambition it can be hard here.

On the plus side it's a flecking awesome place to live! 

Move!  Claire is spot on what you need if you are planning to move here (San Francisco).  This city is expensive, particularly rent.  Some of us are extremely lucky to be old tenants and be living in a decent neighborhood.  So before you move to the city by the bay, get a college degree because lousy wages won't do you any good here.

tink

P.S.  and yes, there's no place like home! 

Do whatever you have to do to be safe and enjoy your new life. You deserve it.

~Kate~

I think one should move if the environment seems dangerous enough to warrant the trouble of doing so but I feel that one should go by actual evidence rather than assumptions on how they might pass or be accepted if they don't.

I live in a small city, with less than 35,000 inhabitants.  The newspaper is unabashedly Republican.  We have a great deal of churches of various denominations, some accepting, most are very conservative, even hateful.  When I transitioned I expected to receive a great deal of trouble and discrimination.

But it didn't happen!

Yes, I experienced a few snide remarks and snickers from some young people and my former employer was discriminatory in how they applied health care benefits but these things could happen in the most accepting places as well.  The point is, if the discrimination and prejudice are real, experienced events, and if they prove to be frightening enough, then by all means, move.  But, as I said to my spouse this afternoon, give people the opportunity to do the right thing before you judge them by assuming they would do the worst.

hugs & smiles
Emelye

I say move. I think hatred is not a rational thing. You won't change it by being there. But you can change it by being a part of an accepting community and keep growing that community until it becomes the norm - change the lowest hanging fruit first.

I voted for move, but i really think it depends on your situation, and you should do whats right for you.

And imo nobody has a duty to stay in a community just to try and make it more tolerant, especially if it involves a lot of sacrifices.  Looking after yourself is more important.

Get out of there if you can. Don't risk it.

This is something I have been struggling with myself. I live in a very rural and very very redneck county in the south. I love my home and many things about where I live( the forest, the fact folks around here don't have to lock their doors, Etc.. ) but its not a good place to be "different". I have had several folks say some mean and nasty things to me while out shopping in the closest small town to me.   At this point I just live here I shop at a city about 30 mins away and the few friends I have live  in towns over a hour from here. Honestly I want to move in someways since I spend most of my time alone and have yet to meet anyone around here to hang out with. With the housing market like it is I just can't sell my place for enough to pay off the mortgage so I guess I am stuck for now regardless of how I feel.
K

I cannot pick one of those three choices.  The decision to move or not depends on whether you feel safe or not.  Your safety comes first always.  This I learned from my Women's Self-Defense classes.

No place is completely safe (without any form of hostility) - even if you're sis-gendered...

That said, some regional areas are more liberal than others.  Typically, it appears the more rural, the more uneducated, and therefor the more fearful the people are. However, there are some small towns that can be found as more accepting, such as depicted in The Sopranos (the town that Vito "vacationed" in), or Gernville/Monte Rio.
 
In all, if you don't "sport the colors" of the neighborhood you're in, maybe you're in the wrong neighborhood.  Personally, I like living in an area where people are open, educated, and supportive, rather than ignorant, closed-minded, and abusive.

If you have to ask, I'd say leave.

Guerneville and Monte Rio are rural, but they are rural parts of Sonoma County, California, an extremely liberal place - and in that reflect more of Sonoma nature than a rural nature.  Both were also, BTW, big countercultural places back in the hippie days, with Morningstar just outside of Guerneville, and Wheeler Ranch in the hills between Monte Rio and the Pacific.  One section of Monte Rio, called Camp Meeker was a total hippie encampment just a few miles away from the Bohemian Grove (yes, that Bohemian Grove) so strange neighbors for sure.  In its current incarnation Guerneville is a major gay resort destination. So they are not similar to rural towns in real rural areas.

But, as was said above, the SF Bay Area is expensive (though wages are a bit higher than other places too) and the job market is extremely competitive - if not a bit dog-eat-dog - as a lot of people want to live here for various reasons.

You know, there are plenty of other places other than SF. Almost anywhere is better than the South.

But even in the classic South I know people who lived in pre-Katrina New Orleans who loved it and a lot in the Miami-Dade-Keys places too.  I think that the West Coast, Seattle to San Diego is pretty liberal and livable, but the Northeast corridor is pretty good also.

Quote from: tekla on July 28, 2008, 04:06:16 PM
But even in the classic South I know people who lived in pre-Katrina New Orleans who loved it and a lot in the Miami-Dade-Keys places too.  I think that the West Coast, Seattle to San Diego is pretty liberal and livable, but the Northeast corridor is pretty good also.

I would add Austin TX to the list of cool places to live, too.

Always loved Austin, on the other hand, it is surrounded by Texas.  But Houston has a huge gay population, and I'm sure that many TG persons live in part of Texas that are not Austin and get along fine.  And, though its got that glossy bleeding hearts and artists deal, SF has a lot of not liberal artists types too.  No place is 100%.

Quote from: Ellie's Lisbeff on July 28, 2008, 08:39:54 AM
I cannot pick one of those three choices.  The decision to move or not depends on whether you feel safe or not.  Your safety comes first always.  This I learned from my Women's Self-Defense classes.

There is now that choice on the poll.

Anna

I live in a subdivision on a fairly large property, with some space between neighbors.  By and large (why do people say that?), my neighbors only notice that Marcy has a woman living with her, and don't ask about Mike.  When I'm doing yard work, and it looks like an old neighbor is watching too closely, trying to make a decision, I throw a twig or something, perfectly girly-style, then they turn away. Girl face, earrings, women's tops and skirt, boobs, butt, etc equals girl.  They just mind their business.
If I felt we were certainly physically in danger, we would move, of course.

Bev