Hi All,

I would like to know how others see transition for themselves. So I just thought I would post this poll.

Peace,

Taylor

PS if I had another choice I could have placed in here it would have been OTHER. 

Hi Taylor,
I chose "Changing my body to fit the sex I am."
That's how I feel about it.
I feel that whether or not I transition, nothing's going to change the fact that I have GID, nothing's going to change the fact that my mind is in the wrong body.
So, I can either transition or forever lead a miserable existence.
Really good question, man, makes people think.
Nero

I am still enjoy being a CD.

Alice

Transition consists of, and is complete when one is satisfied with where they are at. That can be anywhere from just accepting who they are and not crossdressing or making any changes at all. Or to the other extreme of clothing style, HRT, and any of several forms of surgery.

In other words it isn't so much what you do that constitutes transition, but what you accept as comfortable enough to make you feel complete. Transition is an undefinable procedure that varies widely among those in the transsexual community.

"Correcting my body to fit my the sex I am" with the stipulation that it reads "Correcting my body to fit my the gender I am".

Quote from: Sandi on May 30, 2006, 10:29:42 PM...it isn't so much what you do that constitutes transition, but what you accept as comfortable enough to make you feel complete.

Well put, Sandi; it's really not transition from male to female, or female to male; it's transition from who you were to who you know you should be.

Annie

Thanks Taylor, lol... I'm gonna be up all night pondering this now

It perfectly highlights a conflict I've recently been trying to resolve: I'm waffling between #1 and #2. I just can't allow myself to think I "am" female for some reason... and yet I've always known I'd rather have been born female. Always.

The sex I am.. or the sex I (merely) want to be?

Methinks my entire universe is revolving around that unanswered question. Trapped. Spiraling in. That's the wall, the nexus I can't see past.

Hey Taylor,

I chose, "Changing my body to fit the sex I am".  It seems there is no concensus on why I don't feel like the gender of my body, and perhaps it's one of those deals where there are lots of reasons and each of us experience it in our own way.  In any event, I don't feel like a man. Given the available choices, I'll take female.  The only conclusion I can come to, is that somehow my brain developed as a girl, while my body developed as a boy. Since the mind runs the body, my mind has determined I have the wrong body.

I have sat and pondered why I don't think I have the wrong brain.  Why my intellect assumes my body is wrong, instread of assuming my brain is wrong. Most likey because if my brain is wrong, I am basically insane and it seems it's easier to change the body than the brain.  Not to mention that for some reason the thought of trying to change my brain so it thinks like a man, which would bring my whole body back into congruence also, seems kinda repugnant to me. Again, I am not sure exactly why.

I have been asked the question, and I am sure all of your forum veterans have seen it, "if you could take a pill or in some other way change so that you were happy being the gender of your body and you would never miss presenting yourself as your target gender,  would you take it?".  My answer is always no, and in every poll I have seen, the majority say no.

Rationally this does not seem very rational, at first. However, if you ask most people that do not have gender issues,  if they are satisfied with thier gender, they say they are and would not change.  I too am happy with my gender, it's my body I am dissatified with. Again, when asked "if there was a pill that would make you your target gender, would you take it?", the transsexuals say yes, the transgenderists, and crossdressers say no.

I know it's just a matter of semantics, but usually when people refer to one's "sex" they are talking about our physical body and use "gender" when talking about what we feel about which group we feel ourselves to be a part of.

So I have to change my sex, to match my gender if they are incongruent.

Love always,
Elizabeth

Quote from: Kate on May 30, 2006, 11:10:40 PM...
The sex I am.. or the sex I (merely) want to be?
...

^*wink*
The sex I want to be, because it is the gender I am...

Taylor
what you see of me is a reflection in the mirror.
what you do not  see (or rather, what i do not present) is the man who stands in front of the mirror.
Kate is a spirit within that demands to be seen... demands to be heard... demands to express herself.
She has made drastic positive changes to the man in front of the mirror.
changes that family and freinds see and applaud as great personal improvements.
The man in front of the mirror clearly sees Kate as a sparkel within his eye. a glint of hope. and a vision of the future.

Yet the truth is, when you look at Kate... you only see a part of me.

just a reflection of who i am

who i shall become?   thats a work in progress

KateAlice

Quote from: Kimberly on May 30, 2006, 11:03:55 PM
"Correcting my body to fit my the sex I am" with the stipulation that it reads "Correcting my body to fit my the gender I am".

Ditto

Steph

checked number three.

always in between - so it's a little like Let's Make A Deal.:

"Will you trade what's in that box for what's behind door #2 where Carol Merrill is now standing"

I couldn't check any...
Transistion to ME is not a physical "appearance" change or correction.
Transistion to me is more of a mental thing and an acknowledment within myself to accept and love me for whom I am inside regardless of the wrapper. For no matter what I look like on the outside I am and always will be a woman to my core existence.
I think Transition is 75% mental for anybody to truly accept who you are is the greatest challenge I think most of us encounter because we have been programmed to think only oneway "to stay in our box" Sort of speak. an anology i'm sure you can apprecaite Taylor
So for me transistion is coming to terms within myself and knowing beyond any doubt  that I am
"One <insert bad word here> of a woman!"

Hope I answered the poll appropriately....if not honestly!

One woman with much love....
Chynna

I was going to write my own definition of Transition but Sandi said it so much better than what I was about to write when she wrote:

Transition consists of, and is complete when one is satisfied with where they are at. ....

In other words it isn't so much what you do that constitutes transition, but what you accept as comfortable enough to make you feel complete. Transition is an indefinable procedure that varies widely among those in the transsexual community.

She is correct when she states transition is finished when you feel that you are complete, that point for me was partially with HRT and finally with SRS.  That point seems to also bring a feeling of completeness and with that comes a feeling of peace and closure.  It no longer matters if I am wearing a dress or men's jeans and tee shirt (men's jeans seem to wear better for rough work, and sometimes fit better on that developing form of mine).  I may never finish the cosmetic work that should be done to complete the process as at my age it would not be cost effective and has limited value added, considering how I feel at this point. 

I am how happy with who I am and what I am!

Taylor,

    If the body is never corrected to fit the brain, they how can we ever live in complete physical bliss???!!!!!!!!!! Can't wait for surgery!   Good poll.

                                                      Marco

Wow what awsome replies!  I am going to attempt to reply to several of you all within this box lol

Nero:  Yea, I know I have always been the male sex, and I do have intersex traits above the average norm that most people have within them, observed or not. I do not believe that I have a condition of any sort, and I don't believe many of us do to be honest. I believe GID is a explaination that is given so that the world around us that fails at understanding our very nature, needs the term to explain what escapes them. I have no disorder I am in a world where their view is disordered lol. ( my firm opinion by the way) 

Alice: I think Cross Dressing is so wide spread in the human population and people just live denying themselves such a freedom.  I think it is great for those that feel so free to do so!

Sandi:  I could not agree with you more!  Many spend a life time transitioning and others go through it rapidly, and all stop at different points in their life, it is such a individual thing without doubt! But you state that some do not make "any changes"  Transition is a process of change, can you tell me what you mean here? I don't think I get it. Thanks!!

Kimberly:  I dilberately used the term "Sex" because I am not referring to "Gender" I wish I had more space so I could have had a selection box for "Gender" to be put there...I was limited on what they let us put in. Glad you spoke up!

Annie Social: What about those of us that have never changed "Who we are or what we are" just how we are socially perceived?  I am still me, and I am still male, and I transitioned my bodies physical aspects to line up even closer to the male end of the spectrum so I could be seen in this world more accurately to who I "Really" am, and have always been.

  Oh let me give one example here ok?  In the movie TransAmerica, the woman tells her mother " You have never had a son !" her mom thinks that is just so evil! But I have myself in my past said very simular words to someone, so I really relate to this. I think it may be a good example to what I am asking you.

I hear many people talk about having two selves within themselves, and I have a theory on why that may occur,  ( Just a theory of mine) The awareness that the one self was socially created and the self that is fighting within themselves and a need to be set free feels like a seperate identity when in fact it is their natural born identity. ( My personal take on this)


Kate:  Let me suggest a thought to you....  IF Gender is the issue at hand, then it is all that is socialized as a behavior, which yes can stim from the psychi, but if we take into consideration that it may be that the brain is in tune with the body, and the body is simply being observed incorrectly due to lack of our level of knowledge and current technology....well then? You may in fact just be a woman that lands on the spectrum outside of the cluster, but none the less a woman! Just more for you to ponder! lol   


Elizabeth:  You state: conclusion I can come to, is that somehow my brain developed as a girl, while my body developed as a boy.   No one yet has been able to define what a female or male even is...so may I suggest that you are most likely what you say you are from within.  I love what you shared here,  I too would not ever take a pill, because the trustest sense of who I am comes from within me, and that is why my brain is not incorrect, it is in tune with my depths, not just a shell that was socially assigned a label.

KatieAlice:   I am so glad that you have the courage to bring the woman in you out for all the world to know! All the blessings that you will receive from being "you"!! In my book there is a poem that a mother sent to me that her son wrote for her back when he was suppose to be a "she" and was a teenager asking her for help. It too talks of that person in the mirror.

Kimberly: I need to understand a little more. I want to be clear that when I say Sex I am talking about the biological natural state of being of myself, and Gender is the masculine/feminine socialized behavior I express.  Can you tell me more about how you see yourself? I want to make sure I know what your saying for sure, if you don't mind sharing more with me?? Thanks! 


Steph:  ok, I guess I would say the same to you as I have said above to her lol  Peace Gal!

Jan: is there any truer Intersexed person on the planet? You rock gal right down the middle...there has to be a song for you in here somewhere, I can feel it 

Chynna:  For me the internal healing was a required thing, and then the physical transition was just a easy flow, natural, non conflicting in any way at all. I always wish that for everyone! Thanks for bringing such an important thing up!!

Caitlyn:  Yep, we all have a place that works for us somewhere along the way. And yea it can sure vary!

Marco: Bro I am so happy for you!! I know the freedom that comes from the journey you are on! As for complete physical bliss... umm dude I have never found that! LOL  But I am told no man ever does under any condition...but  yea you come a lot closer as things get corrected to what is fitting for you that's for sure! Whenever I read things you write it brings such a sense of gratitude for me, because all these years later it can be real easy to forget where I came from. Right now you can't imagine that, but in like 7 or 8 yrs from now, you will know what I mean! And in 15 yrs from now, you will REALLY know what I'm sayin lol...and you will also know that as the thinning of hair, the growth of some gray hairs, shaving  always mandentory...and you WILL gripe about it ( believe it or not) and you find that your blood pressure is high, and all the things that come with being a middle aged man really do come down on you.... bliss is but a fragment of your imagination LOL ( just messin with ya bro!) Cheers!!  >

Well I think I covered everyone that responded up to date! Thanks so much all of you for sharing what you did. And I am glad that many of you also found it fun and interesting!
Peace,
Taylor

Taylor,
Nicely done!!!!
Love the way you managed to fit that in "THE BOX"!

Quote from: taylor on May 31, 2006, 04:20:53 PMAnnie Social: What about those of us that have never changed "Who we are or what we are" just how we are socially perceived?  I am still me, and I am still male, and I transitioned my bodies physical aspects to line up even closer to the male end of the spectrum so I could be seen in this world more accurately to who I "Really" am, and have always been.

What I should have made clear was that when I spoke of "transition from who you were to who you know you should be", I was speaking of the physical transition; that is, the changing of the exterior to match what has always been inside.

See, that's what happens when I post at 5 in the morning after 2 hours of sleep!

Annie

Quote from: taylor on May 31, 2006, 04:20:53 PM...
Kimberly:  I dilberately used the term "Sex" because I am not referring to "Gender" I wish I had more space so I could have had a selection box for "Gender" to be put there...I was limited on what they let us put in. Glad you spoke up!
...
Kimberly: I need to understand a little more. I want to be clear that when I say Sex I am talking about the biological natural state of being of myself, and Gender is the masculine/feminine socialized behavior I express.  Can you tell me more about how you see yourself? I want to make sure I know what your saying for sure, if you don't mind sharing more with me?? Thanks! 
...

My definition is rather simplistic.

My sex is what my body is, rather a hybrid at the moment.
My Gender is what I am, Female


I have no specific word for my behavior as I behave as me, as dull as that is


So, when I say, "Correcting my body to fit my the gender I am". I am saying "Correcting my sex to fit my gender. I.e. shuffling the body to match the mind and the sense of self. To look at that another way the body is doing the M->F dance, and will eventually catch up with the mind.

When I read "Correcting my body to fit my the sex I am" it does not compute, as it is saying fix the body to match the body in effect, hence my stipulation.

That is the confused mess I see from the straight forward poll

Hi Taylor,
This is an very interesting poll and posting.
I also said "Changing my body to fit the sex I am".
But what real hit me were these words in your reply to everyone who wrote.

QuoteI hear many people talk about having two selves within themselves, and I have a theory on why that may occur,  ( Just a theory of mine) The awareness that the one self was socially created and the self that is fighting within themselves and a need to be set free feels like a separate identity when in fact it is their natural born identity. ( My personal take on this)

I believe that too and that is me.
Recently I have been trying to get rid of the socially created self, but I find it's seems to be better if I unite with him.  I am Jillieann and will always be but he has dealt with the world and people and I can use he's help.
I'm still working on this so don't hit me to hard for saying it. And I think this makes me sound a little crazy. But I am in therapy already and we have been talking allot about this stuff.
Anyway Taylor really enjoyed your take on this double nature I have been fighting all my life.

Jillieann