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A trans trait, or just a coincidence?

Started by gravitysrainbow, August 15, 2008, 10:31:09 PM

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gravitysrainbow

So I was making toaster strudel about half an hour ago (yes, at ten o'clock at night), and I burnt myself on the rack of the toaster oven. I jumped back and shook my hand repeatedly, but I didn't yell or anything. That got me thinking...when I get hurt, I don't make any noise. And I've thought about this before, but never dwelled on it. I have a feeling it's something I've subconsciously taught myself because I don't want to sound girly. I mean...I'm pretty sure I could break a bone and wouldn't make a sound. I've noticed it isn't that I'm stifling whatever noise wants to come out. It's that the connection between pain and "Ow!" just doesn't exist anymore. And I know it used to, when I was younger. Anyone else noticed the same thing, or is it just a random quirk of mine?
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tekla

I'm pretty sure that if you broke a bone, you would scream.  But, why wonder, its easy enough to do and find out to make sure.

Not all pain is the same with all people.  The burn I could handle.  Being forced to eat ->-bleeped-<- like Toaster Strudel would make me howl like a demon from hell.  Really, wallboard with some sugar ->-bleeped-<- on it is more tasty.  So much for ->-bleeped-<-s having good taste.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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findingreason

QuoteNot all pain is the same with all people.  The burn I could handle.  Being forced to eat ->-bleeped-<- like Toaster Strudel would make me howl like a demon from hell.  Really, wallboard with some sugar ->-bleeped-<- on it is more tasty.  So much for ->-bleeped-<-s having good taste.

I guess I don't have good taste either :laugh:!

Anyway, I don't think it's a problem whether you yelp or not (I can understand if you're voice still sounds like a girl). I've heard some pretty wimpy guys before; and they are most definitely guys! I wouldn't worry about it too much myself.


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tekla

Yeah, and I know a whole lot of women who can take pain far beyond what any man can, start with childbirth, end with the jerk who gave them the baby.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Aiden

LOL  ehe I tend to yelp whether hurt or not, usually out of surprise.  Don't cry over bodily injury though.  Just tend to complain when taking to long to heal. 

But yeh people have different pain thresh-holds.   Mine I thought was faily low thresh-hold but noticed in last year that I'm not as sensitive to pain as used to be.
Every day we pass people, do we see them or the mask they wear?
If you live under a mask long enough, does it eventually break or wear down?  Does it become part you?  Maybe alone, they are truly themselves?  Or maybe they have forgotten or buried themselves so long, they forget they are not a mask?
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noxdraconis

Breaking bones are easy enough to handle, no sounds of pain necessary.  When I broke my leg skateboarding, I cried over the fact that my father was going to snap my $150 board, not the leg.  Loosing money is a lot more worthy of demon howling than any injury.  That board easily could have lasted another 2 months.


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NicholeW.

Coincidence.

And I agree with tekla that if you can stomach toaster strudel most pain wil pass you right by!!! :laugh: :laugh:

N~
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Aiden

Quote from: Nichole on August 16, 2008, 12:36:22 PM
Coincidence.

And I agree with tekla that if you can stomach toaster strudel most pain wil pass you right by!!! :laugh: :laugh:

N~


LOL I disagree, because pain doesn;t really pass me by and I like toaster strudel LOL
Every day we pass people, do we see them or the mask they wear?
If you live under a mask long enough, does it eventually break or wear down?  Does it become part you?  Maybe alone, they are truly themselves?  Or maybe they have forgotten or buried themselves so long, they forget they are not a mask?
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Northern Jane

Depends.

If I am alone and do myself a minor injury, I create a whole new language (that isn't fit for public consumption!). If it's a serious injury, I become the Paramedic, cool, calm, and collected, and get it fixed.

If there's a cute guy around, I can whimper and shudder and get all teary-eyed  ::) I love being "rescued"  ;D
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JonasCarminis

instead of silence, its usually like hardcore whispered.  lol  like power whispering.  with lots of inventive words.

i like strudels too. >_>
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Lachlann

Quote from: Chet on August 18, 2008, 08:22:40 PM
instead of silence, its usually like hardcore whispered.  lol  like power whispering.  with lots of inventive words.

i like strudels too. >_>
LOL, I don't know why but 'power whispering' made me laugh quite a bit.

I just grunt. No words for me just, "GRRRRRRRR"

Its really quite satisfying.
Don't be scared to fly alone, find a path that is your own
Love will open every door it's in your hands, the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know, all the answers will unfold
What are you waiting for, spread your wings and soar
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Elwood

Trans trait? No. Over compensation? Maybe. Even men scream when they're in pain.

I personally don't make much noise after my pain is higher than a 6/10. It hurts too much to breathe. I'm not trying to be masculine, that's just how I react. As I got older, I  also learned to cry more quietly, or rather, I don't make a sound at all, hardly. I just breathe hard. I think I learned how to do that because being trans caused me a lot of pain but I didn't want anyone to know about it. I also didn't want anyone to hear me crying because I didn't want them to know I was molested when I was little. Now that all of that is out, I have no reason to cry quietly, but I still do. It's not a manly trait, and screaming/crying isn't feminine. It's human.

When I burned my hand a couple weeks ago, I just said "OW!" and let go of the pain. It was a "masculine to androgynous" kind of yell, I suppose, but nothing was wimpy about it. Again, why do I respond to pain like this? Not because I'm "more masculine," but because that's how I've developed to respond. Screaming doesn't make the pain go away, so I consider it a waste of energy.
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gravitysrainbow

I just realized people thought I was saying that girls yelp when hurt and 'real men' stay silent. I really didn't mean that at all, it was more about knowing any loud noise that comes out of my mouth is going to be high-pitched enough that it couldn't possibly sound male. So...I guess what I was getting at is that it's a little scary that my discomfort with my voice keeps me from making noise when I get hurt. And I was wondering if anyone else had dealt with it, because it worries me a bit.
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Jamie-o

I've always kept it inside when I felt it was necessary.  And yes, I think it's fair to say that when I was younger I felt the pressure to "be a man about it".  Obviously, not from the outside world (at least, not directly), but in order to live up to my own self-image.

I remember when I was 3 my mom warned me not to touch the iron because it was hot.  So, of course, I was immediately filled with overwhelming curiosity.  How hot was it?  Hotter than bath water?  I was manly, I could take it.  So the moment she turned her back I touched the iron.  My finger blistered, but I was so afraid of getting in trouble for disobeying, that I didn't make a sound.  I just stood there with tears silently rolling down my cheeks.  I remember thinking how well I was hiding it, when my mom looked at me and said, with barely concealed amusement, "You touched the iron, didn't you?"  That's when I burst into real tears.  :D

Nowadays pain is usually followed by a sharp intake of breath, followed by a lot of swearing.
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Gracie Faise

I'd really like to figure out how to scream at that pitch...


But I don't really do scream when I get hurt or something. I've seem to taken after my mother in that when something like that happens we GASP really loudly. It's kinda funny.
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Melissa

I'm definitely not quiet, nor is my roommate, so I don't think it's necessarily a "trans trait".  Come to think of it, I've always made noise whenever I've gotten hurt.
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glendagladwitch

Quote from: gravitysrainbow on August 18, 2008, 10:52:39 PM
I just realized people thought I was saying that girls yelp when hurt and 'real men' stay silent. I really didn't mean that at all, it was more about knowing any loud noise that comes out of my mouth is going to be high-pitched enough that it couldn't possibly sound male. So...I guess what I was getting at is that it's a little scary that my discomfort with my voice keeps me from making noise when I get hurt. And I was wondering if anyone else had dealt with it, because it worries me a bit.

It's because girls say "Ow" and "Pow" and "Bang" instead of making guttural noises.  You had to edit out the girly "ow" and did not have the guttural male thing to use in its stead.  I did shatter my leg at age 17 and made not a sound nor shed a tear.  Now its "ow" this and "ow" that.
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Elwood

I don't think "ow" is a girly thing to say. I've heard plenty of guys say it, and they didn't look like girls to me.
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trapthavok

When I get hurt, I DO feel pain. I'm just one of those guys who tries to refrain from screaming "OH !#@%" when it happens so I try to suck my teeth, flinch, and get over it.
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icontact

I have a very high pain tolerance as to staying silent. Unless it is so painful I am crying, which I never do unless something is that physically painful, I am silent. However, this is probably because I am a self-injurer, and since it's not very helpful when trying to keep it a secret to be yelping at every episode, and it escalates quickly, so very soon I could withstand lots of pain without making a sound and eventually not letting myself wince.
Hardly online anymore. You can reach me at http://cosyoucantbuyahouseinheaven.tumblr.com/ask
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