When I very first began crossing the gender line publicly, I was alarmed by the instant loss of something that I had so taken for granted that I hadn't even realized it was there. All of a sudden, that little harmless spark with women-- 7-11 clerks, friends of friends, you name it--was gone. Not on my part! On theirs. I especially recall one gal who had about tripped all over herself flirting with me just a few weeks before, and the next time i saw her, not a flicker. She had no idea I was the same person.
So I thought, oh chit, I don't want to lose this, I really like women (ok ok, so i ADORED women) and it shook me up to think of losing that little frisson with them.
But, as my brilliant sister has pointed out, in the end the gains outweighed the losses. The smiles and hellos I get from other women as a matter of course, because I am a woman. The ability to be with women as a woman, when our hair is down and everyone is real. And yes Virginia, there are women out there who love other women, and sometimes they care for this woman. What I never realized clearly before, was that I was never going to be able to fully connect before, because women I met were wanting a man, and I just couldn't begin to deliver. Now, if they like me, they like ME. (see, i still adore women lol...I just happen to be one!)
And, although I don't have any desire to sleep with one, I really enjoy attention from a nice man, something I would never have experienced before. So, Nero my hero, for me the gains were far greater than the losses. And you're right, there is power in simply being seen as an attractive female. I won't deny that I enjoy it.
Stealth
