So I'm planning to ask my mother to give me a buzzcut the next time she does for my brother, and my father has become increasingly rude about shoving me into the women's department whenever we're out and I plan to call him out on that next time. Both conversations I expect to get to the part where they say, "So why do you want boy's clothing/haircut if it has nothing to do with liking girls?"

And I think I'm at the point where I really don't care if they know, so I'm considering just coming out when it comes to that question. This would be easy with the mother since she has little/no exposure to trans people, and wouldn't really care anyways. However, the father is another matter as he's extremely anti-gay, and has been in denial ever since I told him I was a lesbian way back when. I really don't know how to go about that. Maybe it would be best to wait until he finds me a therapist for my other issues and ask the therapist to back me up, but, how does one answer that kind of question, without coming out?

Saying that haircuts and clothing have nothing to do with gender won't work as he's extremely sexist when it comes to those things. Lately he's taken to grabbing anything pink and telling me I should get it, I refuse and then he interrogates me about what exactly is wrong with getting something pink.

Any help would be appreciated.

uh... have an exit plan in case? *winces*

that's a tough call bro.... I mean I would go with what you said. It's best to come out with a therapist present if you have that option, it makes life less of a living hell. I don't know...It seems like maybe you should just hold off a little bit longer til you get to therapy...if that's in the immediate future. It's a lot to ask of you I know, I know how you feel but you've already come this far

Its hard to say... Basically, which one would have more benefits? Coming out has great benefits for mental reasons, but for external reasons, depends on situation. But Im guessin your dad aint gonna understand it like my dad didnt, and you said hes anti-gay, and he ll probably think its the same thing like alot of ignorant people.