I know that some of my values would not be the same...

In fact I see myself as so stupid in some ways that pain through this has made me a better person to others in a few ways. I almost wonder if I'd be a worse person without something like this...

I did all the typical things that guys do to try and 'hold the ball under the water'.  I have been married three times now, fathered four children, been in the military twice, drove Eighteen Wheeler long haul, been an auto mechanic.  I have tried suicide twice.  If I had had a gun, it would be over.  And that is why I am against carrying one. 

Then I did something that I had tried before, I gave up trying to a man.  And low and behold, I am now happier person, because I am finally the person that I should have been.  Would I go back and change any of it?  No, because I would not be the person I am now.

Yes, I get very emotional at times.  But I even enjoy that part.  After all I am a woman.