To a family that is so hateful. I mean they don't like anything that is not so called "normal" or any other race. The only part of my family that knows are my fathers side. They love me for who I am.

Well I took a three tier approch to it.  For the family I most cared about, well they got the face to face talk.  Boy Telling my kids was tough, but they took it far better then I had hoped.  For the family that was somewhat less important, well they got a detailed letter.  The last group, IE.  the ones that I felt would not handle it well got an email.  That last group included my southern baptist aunts back in georgia.  Oddly enough no one ran away. OH I have a few relatives who worry for my soul, but no major hatred and I still maintain contact.  So your mileage may be a bit different. 

Best of luck to you

Beni