Just a rant sorry:

I've come out to most of my friends and family, but there a few that I haven't yet and it really really sux. It hurts actually. I was just with my one friend at the mall (GG) and I hate how she kept excluding me, pretty much saying with her actions "you wouldn't understand you're just a guy". I do tone things down to androgyne when with her because I haven't told her yet...but I have changed alot in the last few months, externally, and I just keep hoping she will notice and that I won't have to bring it up, because she will ask. Almost everytime I go to the gas station now I get ma'amed, with strangers it's great, even when not trying, but these ppl I've known forever can't even see what's right in front of them. I know I need to tell them already, but wow couldn't they notice? I've pretty much got an A cup now for crying out loud. I must be a master of disguise or something.

I think a lot of people just see what they want to see.  And if there used to seeing you as a guy then having DD breasts isn't gonna change that, unless you spell it out to them!

I know it sucks.  *Hugs*.  Maybe the fact you've changed a lot recently will make it easier when you do tell them.  Like once you have told them, maybe they'll actually realise all these changes, and they'll react better to it.

And yay for getting ma'amed!

I think alot of people just see what they want to see. If they did know you as a
guy it will take them a while to think of you as a female. Its just what they are
acustom to. Thats the problem!

Im in the same situation except my friends know and still insist on calling me
my birth name even though my name has nearly been changed for a year and
I have told them on countless occasions to call me Lee. However they still re-fuse
to do it

Quote from: aubrey on December 19, 2008, 12:56:11 AM
but these ppl I've known forever can't even see what's right in front of them...

That's just it with some people who've known us. Especially if they see us daily, they often don't notice the gradual changes. I still have people who assume the world sees me as a crossdressing male (probably because THEY do).

~Kate~

The hardest changes to see are the one that are gradually, but always, going on in front of you.

Heres a witty response, if the change is ever really apparent and she should know when she says

Quote"you wouldn't understand you're just a guy"

Look over your shoulder and say "Who are you talking to?"

Also on seeing change on people who are right in front of you, they shouldnt notice until they look back. Also, no one notices the earth's geological plates moving, or a large oak tree grow(After its big)

I don't have much to add to what everyone said you're totally right. Thanx for the feedback

Quote from: Kelsey on December 20, 2008, 01:08:19 AM
Heres a witty response, if the change is ever really apparent and she should know when she says

Quote"you wouldn't understand you're just a guy"

Look over your shoulder and say "Who are you talking to?"

I'm not good at those witty comebacks yet but have the feeling I will get plenty of practice

On another note I got a Xmas card today addressed to "Mr." from someone who really knows better. I read about this kind of stuff everyday from the many good folks here but it's still gloriously shocking when it happens.

Quote from: aubrey on December 19, 2008, 12:56:11 AM
"you wouldn't understand you're just a guy"

I hate it so much when people say things like that. It really does hurt. Even when they don't actually say it, it's awful. I feel for you. *Hugs*

Several people I work with, have told me that they don't even remember what I looked like in boy mode anymore. Well at three months RLT and eight months HRT, I would guess so.  Your friends, espeically the one from the mall, will so forget the male part and only see you.

Janet

Had something similar happen to me. No matter how many times people see and hear that this is who you are, they deny it.
A GG freind of mine, who i told all and knows every infinite detail of my transistion, still insists on calling my my boy name. She was interested in me as as a potential BF, and she just could not see, and hear what was being said. Knowing the truth was inconvenient for her.
After many many times it seemed to sink in. A tight sweater and a few months of hormones also help with the reality factor ;-)