I really think I'm ugly. Other people don't seem to think so, but that's because I am being viewed as a man. But I am sure that as a woman I would be hideous. Someday I may look more feminine if I take hormones, but my skin is scarred from really bad acne and sloppy shaving. Even if I had perfect skin right now I would feel ugly though, just because I don't look feminine. I am really scared that I will never look decent and it really makes me depressed.

If you really, really feel that you're too ugly to be a woman, there are plenty of things you can do.
First you'd want to start with electrolysis or laser to get rid of the facial hair so that you can't do any more shaving damage.
Then you can get a chemical peel, which will remove a great deal of the acne scarring and generally freshen up your skin.
Hormones will do a lot to soften your features, fatten them up and round them out. They'll also help with your skin as well, reducing any acne you still have.
There are other tricks you can use as well. Certain haircuts can hide a squarer jaw or accentuate a feminine jaw. Glasses can break up the shape of your face so that it doesn't appear as long or 'horsey' (like my face). Plucking or threading your eyebrows can make a HUGE difference as well, especially if you have big black caterpillars.
Makeup is a wonderful tool. With the right skills and materials, you can do absolute wonders with makeup - on top of the other things already suggested.

Lastly, there is FFS, if all else fails.

But I'm sure you are not as ugly as you think you are 

Most days I feel the same way, I have rather awful stretch marks around my mid-section and thighs, I have man-face, my voice practice is going horribly, I'm too tall, my hairline is receeded, what I do have is quite thin and I've recently developed a nice dermoid cyst in my arm.

I try to focus on the positive things in life.  I tell myself that the world is larger than a mirror's frame and the time I spend thinking about my flaws is lost forever.

Well, I'm going to be a short man with a pussy, but I don't let it get to me. Of course most of us aren't going to be prime specimens of our real gender;we don't have the chromosomes for it.
Just don't get hung up on that fact. You can't measure yourself against genetic girls who had all the stars aligned right the night they were conceived.

I felt like that a few years back...then I realised that the more I told myself I was ugly, the more I never realised that my personality more than makes up for what I lack physically. I now feel like I'm not ugly-just not "very attractive."

And WHAT do you feel is ugly about you? I have seen some women with distinguished (see definiton of "distinguished" for the human male) faces that are absolutely stunning in both physical looks, attire taste, and personality. I have seen some guys with construction worker face/body who (I was amazed to see!) was also with (I assumed dating/married, because they kissed) a tall brunette lady. And then I've met GORGEOUS people, went to school with them, who weren't exacly nice (like, most of the time-at least to me ) If you REALLY want to see what true beauty is, just look at Danny DeVito and Rhea Pearlman...they make it work! (I hope that joke wasn't too early )

Besides, if you wanna talk about just purely PHYSICAL attractiveness, an ugly person is HARD to find. Unique and average people by society's standards are EVERYWHERE. You may be the most beautiful person in your nieghborhood and be AVERAGE compared to the people in the city. And who's to say what a "physically attractive" person is? Facial features, body structure, these are all things nature provides for the "most fit" people to mate and make "the best offspring." But then there is no accounting for taste of individuals, is there?

Also, NO PERSON ON THE PLANET has perfect skin. There will always, ALWAYS be some microscopic defect in every person. Acne is common to teen boys AND girls alike (I think guys get it more though?) And hideous as a girl is so hard to do, you would have to seriously try to look like Monstro de Range. Granted, it may not be as natural looking as you would like...but then again, you had to struggle to become who you want to be, whereas natural born girls are...natural born, and will thus look like so. Not to say NO MtFs have yet to pull of a masterful transition.

Look at yourself again. Take into consideration EVERYTHING about your very being, and answer your question again...are you ugly?

P.S. I don't think your ugly. You insecurities are human, and it shows a soft and concerned heart. Besides, your icon is how I always think of you anways.

Quote from: Pariah on December 17, 2008, 09:12:20 PM
Besides, your icon is how I always think of you anways.

That's really great because that's how I really feel on the inside.

I'm the other way round.
I think I'm fairly good looking. Alright, at least.
But I don't think anyone else thinks that.

The 2nd most important thing to remember is that there isn't really a universal ideal of beauty.

The 1st is that there are plenty of people out there who look worse.
/harsh.

I don't know Sophie... I think you like really good. You look pretty. More androgynous than I'd want to look, but I'd settle for looks like that in a heartbeat!

Quote from: Sophie90 on December 18, 2008, 04:50:18 AM
I'm the other way round. I think I'm fairly good looking. Alright, at least. But I don't think anyone else thinks that.

The 2nd most important thing to remember is that there isn't really a universal ideal of beauty. The 1st is that there are plenty of people out there who look worse.

That doesn't always make it easier when you know deep inside you'd rather not be you because of your body (both sex and phyisicality), and know you would have rather been born female than male. Women (genetic) aren't stuck with that reality trying to make the best of that situation. And naturally passable (trans)women don't necessarily help because they don't grasp the feelings of not passing.

For some the gap between self-hate and self-acceptance is the Grand Canyon, and all the therapy and medical science can't bridge it, only the person looking in the mirror fearing the front door when all you want to do is live as you see yourself and not as you are.

The reality of being doesn't change the hope, only the appearance of it.

Well Aleita, I think of this from time to time.  I guess I'm okay as a man, but I'm sure I'll be one ugly woman!  Add my age (55) into this, and I'm afraid that aside from facial surgery, I won't have a chance to be much more that that.  Sure, it does concern me from time to time, but I think that in the end, I'd rather be an ugly woman than a handsome man.  I just want to be myself.

I get this way too...maybe we all do/have at a point. I worry almost daily about how I will be percieved by the world. My wife says she only sees a girl when she looks at me...but I see the man in make up.

I hope it gets better...but I know Im at that point where I feel better as a woman and that means alot to me and my sanity.

Im guessing soon that feeling will overpower the bad ones and Ill be fine

Quote from: Katherine on December 22, 2008, 08:34:59 AM
.......I'd rather be an ugly woman than a handsome man.

This is the exact phrase I've used many times.  The object is not to have beauty, but congruency.  I find it totally laughable, but there are women I know who think I look good.  It doesn't matter though.  What matters is, no matter where I go, no matter who I speak to, I am perceived as who I am.....woman.
CONGRUENCY MATTERS. 
I should have it printed on a tee shirt.

Bev,
58
very average
finally happy.

I think I should go and find a bridge to dwell under... but the simple truth is that I'd rather live under it as me than cross it over and over as someone I'm not.

Just do the best you can with what you have... hatred, bitterness and resentment at what you don't, doesn't change anything, and is ultimately far more self-destructive and limiting.

Beauty is subjective. You don't have to be 'beautiful'... you just have to be yourself, able to look in a mirror and see the real you, whoever that is.

There is hope for us all.

We are truly our own worst critics when we come to our own appearance. I still look in the mirror some mornings and think WTF? but It is not up to others and their perception on how I look.

It takes time, hormones dont work overnight, but skin will improve, fat will redistribute then its up to each individual to seek any further surgical help they may need.

I have a particularly pretty TS friend who attracts a lot of attention, which she doesnt like and preys on her mind because she feels she will be outed at any time. Being average, being passable has its advantages.

Let nature take it course.

Buffy

Since I have lived within a mostly female paradigm of one sort or another all my life, I can tell you this; All females, from 2 to 100 find faults about their bodies, hair, and face. Even the drop dead gorgeous ones. 

I listen to it all the time. My girl friends ( all real women ) average about 35 years old, and I never heard so much complaining and discontent in my life.
Even my sisters who were blessed with good looks and bodies, aren't happy some times. They all have dancers physiques and postures from years of ballerina classes, and dancing. They are tight, toned, muscled, highly defined and get tons of compliments about their appearance. Yet, they find faults about themselves. I'd kill to have their shapes. And I look good enough, that I get hit on regularly, unless I'm with my husband...

My husband and I go out twice a month for an evening of fine dinning and dancing. Sometimes we go with other couples. It has never failed, that when we girls get to talking, someone makes negative remarks about their appearance. I can count it !

Not one of them is unattractive. So you see, even women who most think have it all, are discontent in some fashion or another with their looks...

The average looking girls or Plain Jane's, seem to be happier than the beauties...go figure!

If you were to see a picture of me you would probably feel much better about your appearance. I am bigger than most N.F.L football players. I'm extremely large.

Geez.  I'll be honest with my thoughts on this.  Right now, I would not rate well on a scale of 1 to 10.  As a woman, I'm not so sure I'm on that scale.  However, all kinds of gg's make up this world, and I have to say that when I look around, once in a great while, I tell myself "maybe I do have a chance". 

Hi  Leiandra, from the couple of pics I seen of you I believe you will look quite fine. But tell you what. Bring the blankets and I'll bring the matches and kindling and get us a fire going under the bridge and I'll catch us a trout we can fry over the flame, MMMMM  mmmm! taste right nice with that can of beans.  "Hee, hee, hee." 

Girl, i felt the EXACT same way you do about yourself. I thought i would never pass as a female and look at me now? *points to my ava* Just work on your appearance, it takes time.
i started practicing on my eyebrows, try make-up? im still a novice at that myself ._. im not really into it that much anyway. and clothes, can make a big difference! so does hair!!!!
all the little things do a great deal of help, trust me
well, just TRY to get yourself together and gain self confidence, you dont need a lot, but just enough to try out all these new things. self confidence is key Hormones really help as well!

-Sakura