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The Frustrations of Androgynehood.

Started by Nicky, December 10, 2008, 01:25:15 PM

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Luna Vyohr

My main problem is people who don't even know me DEMANDING that I conform to a specific gender. It urks me that some people believe that they have the authority to do so. Granted, I am more feminine than male, but I do have male traits and it keeps me balanced. It gets hard to ignore them sometimes. A lot of them are ultra republican, conservative Christians. I'm fine with Christians, but not when they use religion as a weapon.
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tekla

FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Luna Vyohr

It's not that easy when you're surrounded by them in your daily life.
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tekla

I fine that since the old adage is true, Familiarity breeds contempt- the more I'm around them the easier it is to ignore them, it just become part of the background noise.  And vice-versa.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Luna Vyohr

Perhaps so, but they seem to be very aggressive with their methods.
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Nicky

Walk very quietly but carry a chainsaw!
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6thsomatic

Quote from: Nicky on January 06, 2009, 06:41:18 PM
Walk very quietly but carry a chainsaw!

I dunno how that works, but I'd like to see it in action.
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Simone Louise

I finally had the time to read this thread, and hope it's not too late to add a couple of items to the list of frustrations. I know my situation is different than most of yours, but perhaps some can relate.

First, there are my wife and daughter's sentences that begin "You're the man..." For example, "You're the man: do something about that spider." or "You're the man; you should know how to fix that."

Second, are the disagreements with my teen daughter about who her father should be. As in: "You can't wear" a pink shirt or red shoes. As in: "It makes me uncomfortable to have you along when I or I and my mother are shopping for clothes."

Then, there are the nagging fears I might have harmed my adult son's psyche. He's bright and has a stable job, but dropped out of half a dozen colleges, relates better to cats than people, and drops of the face of the earth for months  at a time. Before he was born, I worried I might not be man enough to act as father to a boy. Is he a misfit because I am so weird (at least I managed to get degrees in philosophy and dairy farming)?

S
Choose life.
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Pica Pica

you'd more likely have harmed it if you had played the part of mucho masculine father. With your eloquence and skill and reading emotions, i bet you did a great job.
'For the circle may be squared with rising and swelling.' Kit Smart
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Constance

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 14, 2009, 05:25:52 PM
you'd more likely have harmed it if you had played the part of mucho masculine father. With your eloquence and skill and reading emotions, i bet you did a great job.
Seconded.

Nero

Quote from: Shades O'Grey on January 14, 2009, 05:29:48 PM
Quote from: Pica Pica on January 14, 2009, 05:25:52 PM
you'd more likely have harmed it if you had played the part of mucho masculine father. With your eloquence and skill and reading emotions, i bet you did a great job.
Seconded.

thirded.
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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Nicky

Quote from: Simone Louise on January 14, 2009, 05:19:39 PM
Before he was born, I worried I might not be man enough to act as father to a boy.

I have that exact fear. My boy is due to be born in May. I worry more about when they reach their teenage years, how it will affect their status in the male club, whether they will be ashamed of me, or whether they will be proud that I am their dad. For some reason I don't worry about the same things with my daughter.
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Jaimey

I think as long as you let your children be who they are, they will be fine.  As long as he's happy, I wouldn't worry too much.
If curiosity really killed the cat, I'd already be dead. :laugh:

"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these." GWC
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Nicky

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Jaimey

If curiosity really killed the cat, I'd already be dead. :laugh:

"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these." GWC
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Simone Louise

As I am told my ex-wife warned my son: If you aren't careful, you'll grow up to be just like your dad!

S
Choose life.
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RebeccaFog


But did she explain the precautions your son should take?

I'm trying to figure out what he had to be careful about.   :laugh:
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Simone Louise

Quote from: Rebis on January 15, 2009, 09:56:06 PM

But did she explain the precautions your son should take?

I'm trying to figure out what he had to be careful about.   :laugh:

Good question--and one I cannot answer. I heard the comment second- or third-hand without amplification. My ex and I are on cordial terms (she and current husband were at my house for Thanksgiving to dine with assorted children), but I avoid touchy topics.

S
Choose life.
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Cindy

This is for Luna Vyohr:

And only as a joke!

There is a Scottish comediam called Billy Connely. At one performance he gave a means to deal with the self righteous religous creeps.
Very slowly walk up to them. Invade their private space, until you are faace to face, have a smile on your face, disarming, then scream "F**k Off" direct to them. Then walk away.

I tried this to someone who shouted at me in the street. " What kind of freak are you". It worked, may not in LA  ;)

Love Cindy James
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Pica Pica

'For the circle may be squared with rising and swelling.' Kit Smart
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