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Appreciating the Highly Sensitive Person

Started by Dora, January 23, 2009, 05:12:57 PM

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Dora

Like many here, I knew I was female around the age of four. I have also have been very much aware that I am super-sensitive to people and my surroundings, to a fault - so much so that I decided to not transition in my 20's in order to not hurt my wife or children. (Just one of many examples.)

I always associated my heightened sensitivity to my being a woman but now maybe not. Perusing a local "free University" catalog I came across the following class (which I am considering taking):

QuoteAppreciating the Highly Sensitive Person

High sensitivity is an inherited trait of 15-20 percent of the population. The highly sensitive person, or HSP, notices more in the environment and is more sensitive to all kinds of stimulation as well as to the moods of others and can become overwhelmed by large quantities of input (My emphasis -Dora). The HSP tends to deeply reflect on everything before acting and tend to be empathic, intuitive, creative, careful, and conscientious. They have special needs for sanctuary and solitude, adequate sleep, and regeneration. It is important that the HSP understand and appreciate this trait, then utilize these unique gifts for self, others, and society. Dr. Radde, practicing psychologist, has worked with hundreds of HSs in his psychology practice and has offered continuing education courses around the country. He has reframed his own life using what he has learned as an HSP. This session is drawn from the work of Elaine Aron, Ph.D., author of The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive in a World That Overwhelms You. Learn to identify the HSP trait, understand its unique gifts and vulnerabilities, and specific practices for self-care and self-management.

Dora
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Shana A

I haven't read the book, but my partner did. We both seem to fit the profile, I'm highly sensitive to noise, crowds, florescent light, etc.

Z
"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." Oscar Wilde


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Chrissty

Thank you for the information Dora,

..another paranoia to add to my long list ::)

...I've done a few checks on the Web, and I seem to match the traits perfectly.. :-\

...So mark me down for HSP too... ;)

Chrissty
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sd

I think I may as well, I need to read up on it more, but a lot of it certainly fits.
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Sephirah

I've known this about myself for quite a while, and would just like to say that... um... it isn't really something that makes someone better than everyone else (before everyone suddenly starts identifying as such, lol). There are pretty severe drawbacks.

Particularly this:

Quoteand can become overwhelmed by large quantities of input

One of my weaknesses is sunlight. I get atrocious headaches in strong sunlight and have to wear sunglasses in all but overcast and night-time conditions.

However, in terms of mental and emotional input, being overloaded is a truly horrible feeling. Like you've had the life literally sucked out of you. At least for me that's how it feels. It amounts to your emotions feeling like they switch off totally and all that's left is an empty, blank feeling of apathy and lethargy.

The solitude thing can also be a burden, a need to completely isolate yourself from everything and everyone sometimes because otherwise you feel a maelstrom of intense feelings, sensations and thought patterns that drown out your own feelings about things. I don't think it's the same thing as empathy, in the metaphysical sense of the word, but it feels pretty darn close sometimes.

To be honest, there are times I wish I did not have to deal with it, and be more... I don't know, normal?
Natura nihil frustra facit.

"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." ~ Buddha.

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Above all... remember: you are beautiful, you are valuable, and you have a shining spark of magnificence within you. Don't let anyone take that from you. Embrace who you are. <3
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Stealthgrrl

But then you would not be Leiandra, and that would be our loss ^^

I read the book in 1996 and it was a revelation for me. I finally understood that everybody does NOT process sensory input the same way, and it allowed me to take better care of myself and quit with the "shoulds" based on what other people were like.
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mina.magpie

Oh wow. Can't believe I've missed this thread.

I'd say that description fits me as well. I also can't handle very strong light, and I tend to get horrible heat headaches pretty-much on a daily basis living in the sub tropics. Cold doesn't do it for me either. I'm difficult that way.

As for emotional stuff, I tend to be okay for a while, but suddenly I'll just reach saturation point and disengage. Run away. I won't be able to talk to anybody or do much of anything. Those are the sort of times that I usually get in the car and just drive. like for three, four hours. I used to put a bag on my back and just go get lost for days on end.

Wow. Thanks for posting Dora.

Mina.
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BunnyBee

Quote
can become overwhelmed by large quantities of input

Here I thought this was due to my ADD :P.

The description seems to fit me to a T.  Most of these traits I would not consider "gifts," tbh.  Especially the whole not taking care of my gender issue because of how I felt it would affect others thing.  I still struggle with it heavily.
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findingreason

Hehe, I'd say I am highly sensitive too. I'm not prone to major light problems and headaches (almost never get headaches, ever), but other stuff I know all too well about.

Quote from: Leiandra on January 25, 2009, 05:02:56 AM
However, in terms of mental and emotional input, being overloaded is a truly horrible feeling. Like you've had the life literally sucked out of you. At least for me that's how it feels. It amounts to your emotions feeling like they switch off totally and all that's left is an empty, blank feeling of apathy and lethargy.

The solitude thing can also be a burden, a need to completely isolate yourself from everything and everyone sometimes because otherwise you feel a maelstrom of intense feelings, sensations and thought patterns that drown out your own feelings about things. I don't think it's the same thing as empathy, in the metaphysical sense of the word, but it feels pretty darn close sometimes.

To be honest, there are times I wish I did not have to deal with it, and be more... I don't know, normal?

Yeah, I definitely understand.....I like socializing but am overloaded by others views and opinions and ideas incredibly easy, and can retreat internally in very brief time. I do have attention problems, and try to do many things and make as few mistakes as possible to avoid confrontations, but it doesn't work a whole lot sometimes it would seem....:-\

When people get into opinionated talking or discussing ideas I get overloaded and ready to scream when they argue amongst themselves....it is not fun. I want to be alone, escape, but the downfall is if I am alone to long I become depressed and lonely, and vulnerable to other hurtful thoughts, and gender issues too :-\.

Why does it seem many GID people here are also HSP? I think they run together with each other in this respect.


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paulault55

Dora, mark me down as having HSP too, crowds, noise, doing tests, i just kinda lock up and even though i know the subject front and back i do poorly and many more on the test apply to me. And gee i thought it was only GID i had.

Paula.




I am a Mcginn Girl May 9 2011
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Lacey Lynne

Quote from: Stealthgrrl on January 25, 2009, 08:33:51 AM
But then you would not be Leiandra, and that would be our loss ^^

I read the book in 1996 and it was a revelation for me. I finally understood that everybody does NOT process sensory input the same way, and it allowed me to take better care of myself and quit with the "shoulds" based on what other people were like.

Hi, Dora!

Everybody here has given you such good feedback.  I'm elated just reading it all.  Hope their advice is helpful to you, for it certainly is for me.  Personally, I may as well be that person described by that course quotation.  My family doctor told me when I was 17 that I was very much one of those kind of people.  You are too, it seems.

See what I quoted just above.  This advice has really worked for me, and I hope it does for you too.  Personally, I think that being ultra-sensitive is not necessarily a component of being TS, but I think that they can be related and are synergistically so whenever they are related. 

Best of luck to you, Hun.

Hugs!
Believe.  Persist.  Arrive.    :D



Julie Vu (Princess Joules) Rocks!  "Hi, Sunshine Sparkle Faces!" she says!
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Krissy_Australia

I pretty well match the profile of a HSP person. It would be interesting to see how many HSP people alsp have ESP capabilities. Quite a few times during my life Ive had the notion of something happening and low and behold it has. Hasnt really been a concious thought as a premonition or anything just a feeling. Ide always just put it down to being more in touch with what was going on around me and picking up on subliminal signals.
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Janet_Girl

I fit several.
Quote
High sensitivity is an inherited trait of 15-20 percent of the population. The highly sensitive person, or HSP, notices more in the environment and is more sensitive to all kinds of stimulation as well as to the moods of others and can become overwhelmed by large quantities of input . The HSP tends to deeply reflect on everything before acting and tend to be empathic, intuitive, creative, careful, and conscientious. They have special needs for sanctuary and solitude, adequate sleep, and regeneration. It is important that the HSP understand and appreciate this trait, then utilize these unique gifts for self, others, and society. Dr. Radde, practicing psychologist, has worked with hundreds of HSs in his psychology practice and has offered continuing education courses around the country. He has reframed his own life using what he has learned as an HSP. This session is drawn from the work of Elaine Aron, Ph.D., author of The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive in a World That Overwhelms You. Learn to identify the HSP trait, understand its unique gifts and vulnerabilities, and specific practices for self-care and self-management.

And I am not comfortable in crowds, don't like loud noises.  I can sense power sources and certain magnetic fields.  But nothing that is unmanageable.

Janet

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Dora

Thanks LaceyLynne and everyone else for the comments and thoughts. It is good to know others can relate...

As I read through the responses I have many thoughts... yes, it is good to be HSP as there are some positive aspects to it, but it is also a hell too as it has deeply affected my life in that I made many life-altering decisions that maybe a non-HSP would have. I can also relate to the overlap comments with other diagnosis such as ADD as I am also bi-polar.

I find it ironic that soon after submitting the post about HSP I shut down, isolated and ventured outside only when it was absolutely necessary A month later I am just now returning to earth. I guess I was in my "special needs for sanctuary and solitude, adequate sleep, and regeneration" stage. :-\

I do wonder just how much of this is involved in my decision to transition, and if so, should I be concerned or happy about that?

As I see it the gist of the HSP course and book is: Yes, it's a bitch, but you can use it to your advantage once you identify the HSP in you. So I guess it will be worth the $50.00 to give the class a try. But my gut feeling is it won't be all that helpful in the end. Maybe that's the depression talking... I do plan on taking the 1 night course next month so I will report back here on how it went.

Dora
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Renate

You can write me off as a HIP, a Highly Insensitive Person. Well, actually not.

Some of those attributes above fit me to a "T". I really need my 8 hours sleep.
I am very disturbed by multiple audio sources, like a TV and radio playing simultaneously.
On the other hand, careful? Not me, by a long way. I make quick decisions and go with it.
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Julie Marie

I've known this about me for a very long time, probably since I was in my teens.  And I've always considered it a burden until lately.  Now I can appreciate the value in being highly sensitive but I still have to keep an awareness about being too sensitive.

What's interesting is when I was stubbornly denying my real self I found it so much easier to ignore my sensitivity.

Julie
When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.
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