Hello all,

I'm the SO of an MTF transsexual who is just now attempting voice therapy.  Julia has approached every other step in her transition with some excitement, but her voice has always been a source of anxiety for her.  Her first appointment with a voice therapist was this past Monday and she's already very discouraged -- she's talking about throwing in the towel and pursuing vocal chord surgery, in spite of urgings from myself and her regular therapist that she stay with the therapy regimen for a while before she considers surgery.  She understands that, but it doesn't help her spirit.

Can anyone offer her any advice, words of wisdom, or encouragement from your experiences with voice therapy?

Thanks,
Caroline

How about that it takes time and regular practice for the right muscles to strengthen and the wrong ones to loosen.  I have worked on mine all throughout my transition, which was about 8 months.  A vocal therapist is great for making sure you are practicing the techniques correctly, but it is up to the individual to practice.  I stopped practicing regularly for about a month and then I went fulltime and I have been trying to use my female voice all the time and it's making great improvement in how natural it is just from this week alone.  As I went along, I learned how to talk in a "head voice", yet still sound male, so the first thing I did was alter my male voice.  I think that helped a lot.

At first I thought I would need vocal surgery, but I don't think so any more.  It seems that my voice sounds a lot more female on the phone and in person than it does in my own head.  It took me realizing this and I was able to do it much easier.  Maybe have her try recording her voice on the phone or answering machine (which sounds much different than a tape recorder) and that may boost her confidence as well as allow her to work on it.  If she can sound female on the phone, she'll do fine in person.  Also, she should speak in the voice all the time that she can, even in private.  The idea is to be able to hear the new voice in your head, even when you think.

If you want to hear a sample of my voice you can check it out at:
http://www.melissagirl.com/sounds/melissa.mp3.

If you want to know where I came from with my voice, you can check it out at:
http://www.melissagirl.com/sounds/malevoice.mp3.  (I don't use this one anymore)

Melissa

Quote from: corsi on July 14, 2006, 09:32:27 AM
Hello all,

I'm the SO of an MTF transsexual who is just now attempting voice therapy.  Julia has approached every other step in her transition with some excitement, but her voice has always been a source of anxiety for her.  Her first appointment with a voice therapist was this past Monday and she's already very discouraged -- she's talking about throwing in the towel and pursuing vocal chord surgery, in spite of urgings from myself and her regular therapist that she stay with the therapy regimen for a while before she considers surgery.  She understands that, but it doesn't help her spirit.

Can anyone offer her any advice, words of wisdom, or encouragement from your experiences with voice therapy?

Thanks,
Caroline

Hello Caroline.

Just like any therapy, voice therapy take time, patience and practice.  Even then there are no guarantees the the therapy will be completely successful.  I can understand the stress she is going through as there is nothing worse than passing perfectly up until the point where you have to speak.

It's very disheartening I know, but to  talk about throwing in the towel after just one session is giving up without trying.  Life is tough there is no easy way about it.  Surgery is an option but I would recommend that only as a last resort.  There is even disagreement between the surgeons who perform this surgery as to whether it is worth the risk as the results are far from acceptable and more often than not cause further damage.

My own voice is very poor, but I've stuck through my therapy and to-date I've had three sessions.  Each time my voice gets a little better but it does take practice, and using what has been taught all the time, you can't simply switch back and forth because people may get the wrong idea, and it simply doesn't work.

I believe that voice therapy and facial hair removal is probably the most difficult issues that many TS face, but they are not insurmountable by any stretch of the imagination.  There's no easy way out, if she is serious about this the she has to stick with it or at least give it a valid try.  Give it six months and then re-evaluate things then.  But be aware that surgery is not a viable option, even though the surgeon I saw stood to make a couple of thousand off me he strongly recommended against it because there are no guarantees.

Steph

It took me several years to lean a fair passable voice, and I still don't use me femme voice all the time (due to athsma). Real progress didn't start until I learned some of the physics involved after I started using a site called "Transsexual Voice For The Tone Deaf." There are a few that can develope a voice in a few hours but I think they are the exception.

Once a voice range is found, no matter how crude you are on the right track, but it will probably still take many hours of practice. Patience will pay off in the end. Once I started getting a little better I found that it was hit and miss, sometimes fairly good and sometimes very poor. This tip from a friend was a big help during practice. Before speaking aloud, speak the voice in your mind (in your female voice, not some other ideal female) a time or two and you will get much better results.


Sandi

Great page Sandi.  Without realizing it, I followed many of those tips, especially while I was doing voice therapy.  You want to basically forget your old male voice.

Melissa

Quote from: Melissa on July 14, 2006, 10:23:00 AM

If you want to hear a sample of my voice you can check it out at:
http://www.melissagirl.com/sounds/melissa.mp3.

If you want to know where I came from with my voice, you can check it out at:
http://www.melissagirl.com/sounds/malevoice.mp3.  (I don't use this one anymore)

Melissa

Good mercy!  What a wonderfully beautiful difference!

Chaunte

  Thanks Chaunte.  I recorded those a couple weeks ago and I was having trouble accurately doing the old male voice.  I seem to have lost the ability to completely out of my chest.  Oh well.   It was around that pitch though.  Now the female voice is becoming natural just from this last week alone. 

Melissa

I'm still searching for a voice therapist with MtF experience in the Sacramento region.  I feel the money will be well spent to quickly start and develop good habits as well as quickly de-training bad or counterproductive habits.

Can anyone offer suggestions, recommendations or links?

Thank you;

Karen

Hi Corsi, Karen
this book Finding Your Female Voice is now free of charge:
http://www.deepstealth.com/freebook/
It's pretty solid. Basically this female voice in my view is a musical question.
It's about more music.ß

UPDATE, at the TG support group meeting last night I asked about voice therapists and found out that California State University, Sacramento has training in speech pathology, and if there are any last-year students available, they'll take on people in need of speech therapy (including MtFs, of course) for, get this, fifty dollars a semester!  And the sessions are monitored by the trainers.

I WILL check it out!!!

Karen

That's so great.

These folks aren't stupid, as with me it's all about expanding their own repertoire so to speak so given the chance they usually have no problems helping us out, charity cases that we are

Steph

Prior to transition it was rare for me to go out as me so I never really worked on my voice at all.

After transition it took me a few months to get something of a decent voice and even my therapist commented on it.  I also happen to have a friend who does voice therapy training on the side and she did a session with me at no cost.  At that session we targeted the couple of areas that I needed work and I kept at it on my own.

No matter what it takes work.  Vocal chord surgery is not the path to go down.

Be sure to check out Dr. Koufman's info as well.  She is the one that convinced me that voice surgery is not a great option

http://www.karenserenity.com/OldSerenity/Gallery3.htm
http://www.inbroaddaylight.net/home.htm

The first link give you info on her and the second one is her personal website.

I am one of the fortunate ones whose body is developing on it's very own without any effort-breasts,voice etc. However,even though it's happening naturally it is slow going for me as well. I figure if nature is slow going than it would stand to reason so would therapy. Tell her to stick with it and be ever so patient. Also, medical conditions, as someone already stated, could affect it which I think is slowing mine down too (sinus allergies). Oh, and speaking of my allergies, my sneeze is also converting itself!! My lovely wife thinks it's cute. I hope she sticks with the therapy, and counts herslf lucky to also have such a supportive SO, that's a big plus.

After using my female voice for over a month being fulltime, I recorded my voice again.  I was surprised at how female it sounded.  I think talking to lots of other women helped a lot.

Melissa

Caroline, I have a voice that makes Lurch sound like a soprano and I don't mean Tony.

The voice was a huge barrier for me but when I realized I had to transition I knew I had to get the voice right.  It takes a lot of practice and dedication.  If she is serious about learning to speak in the feminine she will spend the time.  If she doesn't want to do that she should ask herself what she really wants.

Please, don't look into vocal surgery until you've done your homework. Typically it has been a disaster. Most all of us work on our voices.  Yeah, when we're tired our voices get deep.  So what. As long as we are happy.  It's a wonderful life!  Just enjoy it.