Im new to these forums and completely new to forums such as the ones these are intended for, but I feel like I need to find some place to talk with others who feel or have questions like I do. Im not entirely sure, as of late, how I fit into the whole "gender" think. Im not speaking physically, but Im speaking mentality or psychologically. Let me explain. It is a bit complicated.
I am a man. I am 26 years old. I have always known that I was a man and that I had some so-called "masculine" traits, I guess, but that would depend on which traits in particular. When it comes to my mind, the way I perceive myself, I cannot help but feel that when it comes to gender perception as what my behavior is, I am male as in I can understand where they are coming from, why they do things and how they do it, but I am also female. I am empathic, I identify with women. I understand their perception and I like it and I feel more at home being around women, associating myself with women and doing things that they do. If I had to put it in a nut-shell, I feel like I could perceive and act like both male and female at any given time and it mostly goes upon a whim depending on how I feel.
I have no desire to physically change my sex and I actually have no desire to cross-dress. However, lately I have been getting a strong inclination to be more self-expressive when it comes to my physical appearance. I have long hair that reaches below the shoulders. I just do not know how to deal with all this because the things I find myself reaching for are incredibly feminine way of doing things even though I know I am male. I do not necesarily believe I have having a gender identity crisis per say, but I do find my thoughts and feelings to be almost such.
I am married to a woman and I do love her and I love women. I feel sexual attraction to males, but only if they are just the type of men that I feel attracted to even though I would not consider myself gay. What would be the closest that I would classified as if I actually had to label myself? According to my wife, I have several facial characteristics that would be considered feminine, such as my eyes and my lips and my general bone structure and I had to grow facial hair to completely keep myself from getting swamped into a so-called "feminine" identity.
Would I be classified as mestrosexual in that on the inside I am really and incredibly in touch with my feminine side and that I want great clothing, I want luscious hair and would make both men and women jealous at it. Lately, I have been attracted to actually buying make-up to spruce up my face to make my eyes more attractive than my wife says they already are. Am I classified as some sort of "transgender" not in the physical sense, but in a mental sense in that Im comfortable being male, but having extreme feminine tendancies concerning my appearance, my emotions and my perceptions?
Im starting to become quote confused and I dont really know what to do with it. I would greatly appreciate some help.
