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How old is too old to transition?

Started by kimi, March 11, 2009, 02:35:23 PM

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Lisbeth

"Anyone who attempts to play the 'real transsexual' card should be summarily dismissed, as they are merely engaging in name calling rather than serious debate."
--Julia Serano

http://juliaserano.blogspot.com/2011/09/transsexual-versus-transgender.html
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Chrissty

I've come to realise that it not a matter of "too old"....

....but more a matter of how thick we have managed to build the walls we live in....

....and how long it takes for us to break them down.... ;D

Chrissty
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Michelle.

My decision has come down to not how long have I "lived" as man, but rather how much longer could I go on living forcing myself to live as a male.

I'm 33 and have known for sure over half my life that I really am a woman trapped in a mans body.

Thank goodness for transition... its either saved my life or better yet will make life worth living.

Hugs...Michelle.
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Janet_Girl

Quote from: Chrissty on March 14, 2009, 06:02:00 PM
I've come to realise that it not a matter of "too old"....

....but more a matter of how thick we have managed to build the walls we live in....

....and how long it takes for us to break them down.... ;D

Chrissty

We here with the wrecking ball, Lady.  Which wall do you want us to start on?   :icon_builder:
:D

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Vicky

While a girl should never give her age out, I'll plead guilty to having been around since Harry Truman was president. I'm just getting ready to formally start transition in a year and a half when I retire.  The warming up exercises are great too.  :-*  Yes that is me in the photo from about ten months ago.   :icon_mrgreen:
I refuse to have a war of wits with a half armed opponent!!

Wiser now about Post Op reality!!
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Yvonne

Let's hear the opinion of a young woman now.  I think if you're 30 or over, you're too old to transition. Does that mean you shouldn't transition? no it doesn't mean that. Unlike young transitioners that had a solid conviction of what they were when they were children, I also know there are many gals that didn't get a clear sense of what they were until later on in life; they married other women, had children, hid in their careers & marriages, fell into their own traps to deny what they were so it's only fair that they break thru all the fear & guilt and be who they are even at an older age.  What everybody should be asking isn't about when it's too old to transition but if your transition is going to be successful when it's done later on in life.
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heatherrose



Quote from: Yvonne on March 18, 2009, 11:49:16 PM
Unlike young transitioners that had a solid conviction of what they were when they were children

Yvonne,

You are truely blessed to have been able to transition
in a time when you had the information and support availible to
you that you needed to make your dream a reality. Please
don't assume that because I transitioned at the age of fourty
that the conviction that I or anyone of my generation or
before us felt was any less strong. I didn't go through life in a
state of confusion, befuddled as to what my problem was.
As I sat crying across the kitchen table from my Mama as I told
her I wanted to be a girl, at the age of seven, the only one
confused was Mama. She was also terrified for me of a society that,
up to a short time prior to this point, "Treated" conditions such
as this and homosexuality with aversion and/or electroshock "therepy".
How many beatings would you have to endure before you
realized that the only way you were going to survive was to "Man Up"?
Do you know the story of "Stonewall"? If you don't, then you
might find it interesting reading. We all stand on the shoulders of
giants. As I look at your picture and those of all the beautiful
young women that populate this site, my emotions are bitter sweet,
I am overjoyed for your generation, that you are able to enjoy
the victories of the horrible struggles that those that have come
before you have had to endured. At the same time I am dam jealous
because of what decades spent living behind a carefully constructed
facade has done to my body. I am not seeking your apology or
your pitty, I only wanted to give you a small glimpse into what life
was like for one old manly looking bitch.


Always Love,
Heather Rose
"I have always wanted to have a neighbor just like you,
I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood with you.

So let's make the most of this beautiful day,
Since we're together, we might as well say,
Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
Won't you be my neighbor?" - Fred Rogers
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petzjazz

Technically, it is never too late in life to transition. There are no legal age limits on transitioning - you can be 18 or 81, and you'll get the same medical treatment.

If you are so desperate to transition that you can't see living your life in your birth gender, then by all means, become who you are.

HOWEVER: People (particularly MTFs) who transition later in life usually do not pass as well as those who transitioned early. If you do transition, you'll have to come to terms with the possibility that you may get "clocked" more often than a younger MTF. The male body and face structure is such a deviation from the "default" female structure that it is unlikely that a 48-year-old birth-male who begins transition will be able to pass 100% of the time.

However, this is not about other people. This is about you. Do YOU want to transition? Do YOU feel like you'd be much happier as a woman? Then do what makes you happy. Other people's opinions don't mean a thing if transitioning would mean finally being at peace in your own body. 
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kimi

Thank you all for your comments... I appreciate them all.  I do have to say I can relate to Heatherrose, I was 4 yrs old when my mom asked me "How's my little boy?"  I answered her "I'm not your little boy"... I have since been tormented for 44 years since then.  As for Yvonne, yes, my question was how old is too old... Unlike young transitioners that had a solid conviction of what they were when they were children... I was growing up in the age of Rene Richards... we were not as lucky as the younger generation is now... it would have been literal suicide if it were to be known before... (being hispanic - Mexican) now with more and more acceptance of transitioning MTF, FTM... corrections can be made.  I know I will never look 100% female - 165 lbs, 5'7" etc... but inside where it counts I will be true to myself... reading all of your posts, I have come to the realization I must be true to myself at whatever the cost... for if I am not, the only person I am fooling is myself.

Again thank you all for your comments... I have taken them all to heart.

Kimi
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Hypatia

I transitioned at the age of 48.

(I realized I needed to do something about my gender when I was 45... then I began preparing for transition... it took me almost 3 years to prepare before I took the plunge... but many others move through the process a lot quicker... I took longer because I had my family trying to apply brakes on me... until I busted loose and went for broke)
Here's what I find about compromise--
don't do it if it hurts inside,
'cause either way you're screwed,
eventually you'll find
you may as well feel good;
you may as well have some pride

--Indigo Girls
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vanna

the passing issues at an older age is a mute subject when compared with excellent ffs results.

if your comments are based on hrt treatments alone then yes but with age comes finance and ability to pay for things you cannot as a youth.

i can say i have never seen a badly passing older woman to date who has had good ffs and most are just living their lives un-noticed
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noeleena

hi ...just a little here i am 61 . h r t for me was about 4 years ago .. my s r s & b a .     19 may 0 7 been out over 11 years .how old do you need to be only as old as you can take havining your op.s . healh wise is the only concern . & mentally  (( un less . you are a nut case like me )) thats a giggle.....  youll do good .. just prepare your self first . mind & body ....
      ...noeleena...
Hi. from New Zealand, Im a woman of difference & intersex who is living life to the full.   we have 3 grown up kids and 11 grand kid's 6 boy's & 5 girl's,
Jos and i are still friends and  is very happy with her new life with someone.
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cindybc

Hi Kimi, welcome to Susan's

As long as your heart, blood pressure, liver, lungs, blood checks out OK you can be 99 years old, if you pass the physical you can transition and have SRS as well. I am sixty four, been living full time 9 years and post-op 4 years. There is another here who is 73 years old and had her surgery at the age I am now.

Aging will affect you in the sense that as you get older you're testosterone level drops as a normal result of aging. With the lower testosterone level you will find an acceleration in your gender dysphoria complication and discover it being increasingly more dificult to control or repress effectively as a result.

It is said that HRT works most effectively the younger you are, and I will not dispute that, for it appears to be a more constant result in the younger generation. then it does in the older generation. But I am quite satisfied with what I got out of the estrogen in the past 9 years, I have no complaints, it may just take a little longer then a younger person. I am the one with the long brown hair on the right in my avatar pic and that is my partner sitting tot the left of me.

When your time comes that you need to go forward hun, just put one foot ahead of the other  and don't look back. Because in the end it is your decision to make and only yours, on one else, you do it for you. Of course do consult a therapist to help walk you through it, you will need someone who is a professional to confide in.

Cindy
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Genevieve Swann

Somewhere is the forums you can  find info on Aunt Christine. She is from Florida and is 66 years old.

Sandy

Just a thought.  Actually a couple.

We've heard from all the ladies who have posted who are "mature" (me included).  But where are the guys?

All right all you gents out there!  You know we ladies don't usually talk about our age, but here we have bared all.  Now it's your turn!

How many older (alright mature) gents are out there and when did you transition?

Another thing.  This question has come up a couple of times, maybe we ought to make a separate topic for the older (mature!) person who transitions.  That could be anything past (or waaaaay past) puberty.  Maybe 40 something?

What are your thoughts, everyone?

-Sandy(don't muck about with me or I'll swing my cane at you!)
Out of the darkness, into the light.
Following my bliss.
I am complete...
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vanna

i would much prefer you made the thread wayyyyy past 40 something please Sandy

i am fast approaching that age :P
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Ms Bev

I was 55 when I transitioned, but I had a clear sense of who I was at an early age.  In the 1950's, transitioning was not something someone could do, except for Christine, of course.  And was I jealous of her!  Yes, I married, had children, career, etc, and now.....I am Beverly

Anytime is a good time to pull out a thorn.



Bev
1.) If you're skating on thin ice, you might as well dance. 
Bev
2.) The more I talk to my married friends, the more I
     appreciate  having a wife.
Marcy
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Nero

Quote from: Sandy on March 20, 2009, 11:23:10 AM
Just a thought.  Actually a couple.

We've heard from all the ladies who have posted who are "mature" (me included).  But where are the guys?

All right all you gents out there!  You know we ladies don't usually talk about our age, but here we have bared all.  Now it's your turn!

How many older (alright mature) gents are out there and when did you transition?

Another thing.  This question has come up a couple of times, maybe we ought to make a separate topic for the older (mature!) person who transitions.  That could be anything past (or waaaaay past) puberty.  Maybe 40 something?

What are your thoughts, everyone?

-Sandy(don't muck about with me or I'll swing my cane at you!)

Well, unfortunately I'm transitioning now at 30. I had planned to do it 3 or 4 years ago now, but circumstances arised such as ill health. And I'm only now medically able to transition (I think, still have to get a clearance for HRT and surgery).
So, yeah, now I'm an old transitioner.  ;D
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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heatherrose

Quote from: Miss Bev on March 20, 2009, 12:18:51 PM
Anytime is a good time to pull out a thorn

OW  OW  OW  Thanks Sis.

I didn't need that mental image.

OW   OW  OW  OW

"I have always wanted to have a neighbor just like you,
I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood with you.

So let's make the most of this beautiful day,
Since we're together, we might as well say,
Would you be mine?
Could you be mine?
Won't you be my neighbor?" - Fred Rogers
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Tanya1

is 19 too old and stupid to transition?

I'm 18, almost 19 in a few days.
I have my E shot today and I'm on AAs.


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