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Hun, Sweetheart, Dear

Started by V M, March 27, 2009, 08:13:15 PM

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V M

I've noticed that many women and some men will refer to me as Hun, Sweetheart, or Dear. So I am wondering what is their perception of me? Do they see me as a man? woman? a TG? I'm not sure  ??? Men will often hold doors for me. But this is common where I live. Some women will call everyone Hun...etc. I'm feeling a bit confused  :laugh:
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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imaz

Quote from: Virginia Marie on March 27, 2009, 08:13:15 PM
I've noticed that many women and some men will refer to me as Hun, Sweetheart, or Dear. So I am wondering what is their perception of me? Do they see me as a man? woman? a TG? I'm not sure  ??? Men will often hold doors for me. But this is common where I live. Some women will call everyone Hun...etc. I'm feeling a bit confused  :laugh:

What would you really like us to call you? :)
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Janet_Girl

I am guilt of using "Hun" with customers.  I some how feel into that habit, not really sure why.

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Jaimey

Generally, if they are calling you hon (especially men), they see you as female.  Women can go either way, but those are terms generally reserved for women.  Older people go either way too. 

Terms like that used for men by men are usually 'brother', 'son', 'man', etc.  I'd say it's pretty unusual for a man to call another man 'hon' or 'sweetheart' unless he is a lot older...like grandfather older.  Although a guy I worked with once called me "son" and I was definitely dressed as a girl.

I use those terms too.  But I'm southern, so that's my excuse.  ;)
If curiosity really killed the cat, I'd already be dead. :laugh:

"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these." GWC
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KYLYKaHYT

I think it's pretty much like Jaimey said; a lot of women just call everybody 'hon,' but if a guy calls you hon, sweetheart or dear he most likely sees you as a woman. Personally though, I've never even seen an older man use any of those terms when addressing another male.
ƃuoɹʍ llɐ ʇno əɯɐɔ ʇɐɥʇ
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Saraloop

 A guy could call you hun in the situation where he saw you as a guy but suspected you of being gay or tg and didn't want to hurt your feelings.
Personally, I don't like the term hun, not sure why. I think it's because it's awfully carpetty, .. Hun, huun, hunnn... I dunno, there's just something about it that feels like a carpet... and I don't like carpets all that much. 
Sweetie is cool, and it works for anyone who isn't a prick. :)
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Genevieve Swann

I know several gays who over use the term hun. Maybe they can't remember names. I have a friend who used to call me brother until he saw me dressed the first time. Now it's sister. I like dear, dearest, sweety. Even the "B" word is appropraite at times. A GG friend calls me slut sometimes and I thank her.

Yochanan

People tend to call me this kind of name because I look young and female. I went into a meeting for the philosophy club at my school and the guy who ran it immediately started calling me sweetheart and, addressing the group, said, "gentlemen and lady". When another female came in, I didn't hear him call her sweetheart or anything, but he switched to "ladies".

I probably won't go back to that club. All I ask is to not be patronized, and what does it get me? Ugh.
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tekla

I love those words, saves me the trouble of remembering names.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Pica Pica

I get called flower and petal sometimes,
'For the circle may be squared with rising and swelling.' Kit Smart
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tekla

Oh, what I get called is a very different list.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Pica Pica

Quote from: tekla on March 29, 2009, 02:00:43 PM
Oh, what I get called is a very different list.

well kids can be so cruel
'For the circle may be squared with rising and swelling.' Kit Smart
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tekla

Well if its cruel to be kind, I'm basking in the mother's milk of human kindness. 
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Nicky

I liked "mothers milk" by the Chilles...

I don't think there is any indication that they see you as a man Virginia. If you find pleasure in it then please enjoy! I remember someone called me petal once and I think I simpered and fluttered my eyes a little  :icon_cute:

I'm trying to think of our New Zealand equivalents. People here don't tend to say hun, or sugar, or sweetheart or luv. You do hear "my dear" fairly regulalry as in "can I help you my dear" - but it is a bit more of a familiar way of addressing someone when there is a bit of cheekyness in the air or it is an affectionate diminutive, usually said by older women to anyone.

We do say mate and bro or buddy, even with women. More formally sir or miss. I'm going to keep an ear out.
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V M

I enjoy the R.H.C.Peppers also  :laugh: When I lived in Calif. it was common to refer to girls as Bro, Buddy, and Dude. But I mostly lived in beach towns. I did find it odd when guys would refer to me as Dude and Bro...then try to feel me up  ???
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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KYLYKaHYT

If somebody called me petal or flower I'd probably assume they were being a smart-ass.

My partner and I sometimes jokingly address each other as dude. And a couple of my guy friends still occasionally call me dude too, but always in a surprised/excited expressive sorta way like, "Whoa, dude, check out that cool such-and-such". Of course these are guys I've known since long before I transitioned, so it really doesn't bother me.

I hear a lot of guys call each other "Dawg" these days though, and that's definitely where I'd draw the line. :icon_boxing:  :icon_bat:
ƃuoɹʍ llɐ ʇno əɯɐɔ ʇɐɥʇ
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Yochanan

Where I live, dude is completely gender-neutral. Guys say it to girls, girls say it to guys, everyone says it to me and I say it to everyone. I wouldn't call a female bro or buddy though.
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V M

#17
Maybe it's a beach town thing.(Dude, Bro, Buddy) I mostly noticed it with the surfers  :laugh:
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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sparkles

i work in barnsley in the uk, world renound for love petal, hun etc its all they ever use so its really difficult to tell if there using cos they see me as female as they just use it all the time anyway. one thing i have noticed though is that i use hun a lot more when talking to female friends than i used to. i think its one of then relating words when used like that
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Bombi

Down here in the Caribbean everyone is addressed as sugar, dear, darling, girl/boy friend, sweetie and on. We are also very formal about greetings. When ever you pass someome, walk into a store or the post office or a govt. building you must say good morning, afternoon, evening or night or you are considered rude and the offended perso gets vexed. It's a cool custom and one of the appealing things for me.
Yes there is really bigender people
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