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Started by Jester, March 26, 2009, 08:05:50 AM

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Vicky

Having had sisters and daughters (as well as their mother) to do shopping for and with, I didn't really ever have much of a problem, since, as you have read, most salespeople want the merchandise out the door after your money is in their hand.  I have had a couple of smart aleck cashiers remark that I would "look good" in a certain garment, to which I just say "Thank you, I hope so!" after which both of us easily laugh about it, I pay the money and go out the door. (This actually happened one time when I was buying something for my oldest daughter, and she told the cashier "like hell he will, this one is mine!! Neither the cashier or I were able to stop blushing or laughing for quite a while. My daughter was 10 at the time.)   I am quite sure that if I ever came through in female mode, they would never identify me as the "guy" who bought something. 

For sizing, do look at some of the web sites that have size charts on them, get yourself a good tailor's soft rule, (aka measuring tape) and fit your sizes to theirs to come up with an approximate size.  There are many of these web sites, some listed on the resource pages here on Susan's. 

My real good suggestion for you though, is find a "->-bleeped-<- Shop" near where you live, and while they may be ARE more expensive than J.C. Penney's, you can shop there and get a lot of help that you can use on your own in the days to come. Have fun! 
I refuse to have a war of wits with a half armed opponent!!

Wiser now about Post Op reality!!
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Cindy

Hi
It's a fear that many MtFs have and CDs. It's really no problem. As others have said clerks want a sale. They know mnay of the guys are CDs, particularly in bra shops. Get to know your size. Get a tape measure. place it around your chest that gives you inches or centimeters depending where you are.  If you are about 36" you are asize 12. How big do you want the cups? Depends on your body size. I'm 5' 9" and 57kilos. a C cup looks nice.
Skirts, you cannot try them on 'cos you are too nervous. Take the tape measure and take yoyr waist size. Divide in two. Put the tape measure on your arm. Mesure from your finger tips along the arm. Draw a biro mark. In the shop hold uo a skirt. along your arm, get the size that fits. No one cares. If anyone asks. and they won't say it's for you. People really don't care.
The last top I bought in guy clothes ( I'm usually FT shopping but I was caught out and had to be in drag). The top was gorgeous, had to have it. The sales girl sais who is the lucky girl getting this. I said me. She went a bit white and then said. I've just recieved a jewellery order and I'm sure we can accessory size this. We did. I then said there was a skirt in another shop I liked but  couldn't find a sales assistant to help. We were there in seconds and I tried the skirt on. Dressed as a guy. They had no problems just wanted to help. I also bought shoes and that again was no problems. I've just bought this top and skirt, what will go with it? I'm a size seven. Here are some and here are some nice others. Spent a fortune.

The fear of fear is the biggest fear.

Just try it, maybe as someone said in another city.

Just be confident. It is your money and their sale. They really don't care who it's for.
Are you laughing at me? Get the manager. I won't to know why I can't buy goods in this store. Sales person sacked, and they know it! BUT be pleasant and friendly, say you are shy. They will now you are no threat. You are not their dating material, but you are no threat to stealing their boyfriend. And that is all they care about.

Enjoy.
I love clothes, jewellery, shoe, bag, make up, perfume shopping. I'm totally addicted. OK I go FT but I didn't always. NEVER had a bad experience.

Love and get liberated
Cindy James
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joana52

Hi Everybody, I'm Joana from Sydney Australia, I'm a CD and loving it more and more but still in the closet, I'm afraid my wife would not understand as she already feels that i am crazy. Would love to find out where in Sydney I could have friends like me to hang out with as it's a lonely feeling to be the way I am at the moment. cheers joana  :-*
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CarolAnn

Gotta say, it seems tense @ first, but really think about it!

It's not against the law and the only thing you may get is a comment from the check out person (I ALWAYS go to a Female) and believe me, from experience, IF they make any comment, it won't disturibe or threaten you. To be honest, it can be quite a RUSH!!! I have had Female checkout persons ask if the clothes were for me.

You know, I wasn't arrested or anything. The fact of the matter was she was very nice.

CarolAnn
:icon_flower:
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Wends

If you go during off-peak hours I've found that the sales assistants can be very understanding and helpful. They often have as much fun as you will.
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DawnAlicia

Try not to put so much pressure on yourself.  Even today, I usually browse until I find something I like but even then I usually won't buy it right away.  I will visualize how I will look in it and may not actually buy it for weeks.  This also allows an opportunity to wait for the right time to buy it.  For me, I also always buy from female clerks and I try to buy from clerks that I am attracted to and are dressed in feminine attire, preferably a skirt or dress, heels, and pantyhose.  I like the implication that the clothes are for me and really like it if there is a conversation regarding the clothes, etc.  I don't make excuses and try to project an air of confidence.  The ritual of putting an outfit together is one of the fun parts of dressing en femme for me so I hope that you will come to enjoy it as well!  Good luck!
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SarahFlwr

I tend to such places as you are talking about and pick up clothes along with other items or even male clothes to solidify the look of buying them for your wife. Also as long as you are young you can use the fraternity prank/rush line when buying girly clothes.
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Constance

Another option could be Freecycle. I'm on the local Freecycle mailing list and recently there was a post from someone giving away clothes. The size happen to be ideal for my wife and daughter, but some seem to fit me. I responded to the post saying I'd like them for my wife and daughter. If any don't fit me but might fit them, it's a win-win.

kelliboots

Remember most people don't notice or care what you are doing.  They assume you are buying for a girlfriend..easiest answer.  The other is that commissioned sales associates will sell you the rack of clothes and not care one bit what you are doing.
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barbie

When I purchased thongs at a department store in the U.S. about 5 years ago, the female cashier at her 20's asked me "Is this for you?". At that time, I was apparently in male mode with short hair. Simply, I did not reply to her inquire, as it is not her business.

Anyway, I still wear those thongs. They are so much endurable.

Barbie~~
Just do it.
  • skype:barbie?call
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chrysalis

I like Barbie's approach. If you feel you must give a response just say, "Oh yaknow..." and leave it at that. It's the most vague reply in the world that counts as a response without telling them anything.

Alternatively just look busy with your cell phone it's the perfect excuse not to talk to people these days.
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tekla

A whole 'lotta people become sales persons because a) they are people persons by nature, and b) really like and feel a connection to what they are selling.  They want to talk to you, in fact, many stores have a policy that you have to be greeted within a few seconds or something.  Also, they know, the more they talk to you, the more they can sell you.  If you can find it within yourself to tell them the truth, they just might be able to help you.  So I've found to be the case.
FIGHT APATHY!, or don't...
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Suzy

Quote from: tekla on May 22, 2009, 01:39:28 PM
They want to talk to you, in fact, many stores have a policy that you have to be greeted within a few seconds or something.  Also, they know, the more they talk to you, the more they can sell you. 

Many stores also do this for security reason, too.  They have found that if someone is very aware of their presence they are less likely to steal.  It does not mean they are looking at you funny.

Kristi
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Janet_Girl

Being in retail, I can tell you that you meet and greet customers for two reasons.  First to initiate a sale.  Second, to spot potential thieves.

I have been asked many times.  How many people would ask to help this man?

That is Howard Hughes, one of the richest men in the world.

Looks do not matter to a salesperson.  Unless you look shady.

Janet
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Jester

That's what the richest man in the world looks like in spy movies.  I think that's awesome.

I've actually gone out and bought a few things at various places in town, but it came to bra shopping and I just lost the ability to not overstress it.
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vickn

Quote from: Jester on March 26, 2009, 08:05:50 AMI wanna buy some women's clothes, but every time I try I get nervous and start second guessing myself and I end up leaving empty handed.  I even have the perfect place to do it without anyone noticing- it's a grocery store that happens to have a clothing department and automated tellers.  Then, in my head, I'm like "what if somebody sees me?" or "What if the automated teller screws up and I need to talk to a clerk?" and online isn't the best way because my roommate is my brother.I dunno.  I'd really like to go out and by some gender appropriate clothes.  It's the exam crunch and they'd really help keep my spirits up.
Honey try using mail order,however I have found that most shops dont worry much they wont your money I,ve been in and tryed on cloths while dressed in male clothing
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chrysalis

I did want to add that you'll be surprised how far you can get in life by just being cheerful, smiling, and using normal direct eye contact. It's far from a panacea but it will help almost any situation.
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gennee

In the beginning I was a little apprehensive but not now. I browse the women's sections with no funny looks or comments from others. I bought things for my mom when I was boy so shopping in the women's section doesn't faze me.


Gennee

:)
Be who you are.
Make a difference by being a difference.   :)

Blog: www.difecta.blogspot.com
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Bdnewgirl

The first thing I did was to write down what size I wanted, said it was for my niece, and asked the clerk to help pick out a outfit. I might add she had great taste and was so happy to help.
After that, now I just go grab some stuff and act like I don't want to do this, and nobody says anything
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gennee

Quote from: chrysalis on June 01, 2009, 02:34:47 AM
I did want to add that you'll be surprised how far you can get in life by just being cheerful, smiling, and using normal direct eye contact. It's far from a panacea but it will help almost any situation.

I do this, Chrysalis and I get smiles back.

Gennee

:)
Be who you are.
Make a difference by being a difference.   :)

Blog: www.difecta.blogspot.com
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