THINGS THEY DON'T TEACH YOU IN SCHOOL
RULE #1: Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teenager uses the phrase "Life is not fair" 8.6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so often you decided they must be the most idealistic generation ever. When they started hearing it from their own children , they realized the second part of Rule #1.
RULE #2: The real world won't care as much about your self esteem as your school does. You will be expected to accomplish something before you get to feel good about yourself. This may come as a shock. Usually, when an inflated self-esteem meets reality, kids complain it's not fair (see Rule #1).
RULE #3: You are not going to make $80,000.00 a year right out of high school. And you won't have a company car and a car phone and an expense account either. You may even have to wear a uniform that has a designer label on the front of the shirt advertising the company you are working for.
RULE #4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait until you have a boss. He doesn't have tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you screw up, he's not going to ask you how you feel about it.
RULE #5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping, they called it an opportunity. They weren't embarrassed making minimum wage either. They were thrilled to have the opportunity to make that first step towards independence. They would have been embarrassed being unemployed sitting around talking about the latest music release or how high they scored on the newest video game while they mooch off their parents.
RULE#6: It's NOT your parents fault: You screwed up, so you are responsible. There is no one else to blame. Forget "It's my life", "you're not my boss" and other eloquent proclamations of your generation. When you turn 18, it's on your dime. Don't whine about it or you'll sound like a baby boomer.
RULE #7: Your parents weren't always this boring. They got that way paying bills, cleaning up after you, nagging you to get your act together and listening to you tell them how they have no idea what it's like to be a kid in today's world. And by the way, before you try to save the rain forest from the blood-sucking parasites of your parents' generation, try delousing the closet in your bedroom.
RULE #8: Your school may have eliminated winners and losers, but life hasn't. In some schools they give you as many chances as it takes to get it right. They lower the grading system making it easier to get an "A" and harder to get an "F" and have abolished the class valedictorian, lest anyone's feelings be hurt. Effort is just as important as results. But don't worry about that because your boss will go easy on you to spare your feelings.
RULE #9: Life is not divided into semesters and vacation breaks and you don't get the summer off. You will have to show up to work every day for eight or more hours a day five or more days a week. You don't get to start over every grading period, it just keeps adding on. A failure built on a success is still failure. If you leave your seat, it may not be there when you get back. While we're at it, very few jobs allow you to foster your self-expression or help you find yourself. Fewer still lead to self-realization.
RULE #10: Television is not real life. Your life is not a sitcom. Your problems will not be solved in 30 minutes less commercial time. They will not go away at the end of the show. In real life, people actually have to leave the coffee shop to find a job. Your friends will not all be beautiful people whose only concern is who they are going to sleep with this week. They will be real people with real problems and a genuine personality who, like you, will also come to the realization that these truly are some of the rules of life.