Ok, so I'm low on my patience for stupid people lately. Including my mother, my friend and any other idiot that just so happens to be out there too.

A friend of mine has informed all of her party friends at my new college of my arrival, and is refusing to tell me who and what is up, and I am pissed for her doing this to me. Tonight I shall be confronting her about this, as I have no patience for people that don't take life and their education seriously, and get to the root of this. I planned on rebuilding my life anew going to a place where no one knows about me, and she f***ed that up.

On top of that, I've talked to my mom about this and other things, and she is pissing me off too. She thinks that she has always treated me and such right and never bad. And that not to base what she'll do to us off how she treats others about things (other TG people in this instance). Well the fact she disowned me initially and hurt me severely says enough to me. She's insane imho when she says it's my temper that made it worse than it was, when she was the one that came after me to begin with. Bitch. How else would she expect someone to take that kind of treatment? The ignorance and arrogance amazes me.

I told her about this friend and what she did, and then she says she was only maybe considering me getting friends there and for my best interests......Uh-huh. Whatever. This partying bitch knows I don't party, and knows I care about my grades, and then tries to involve me with people I don't even KNOW, and mentions to be aware of one that is "touchy". Without even telling me. That is not a friend. My mom says about being nice person in handling these things, and I will be mature with handling this "friend", but if she gives trouble I will be strict and firm about what is the case. If you play nice all the time, you will be run over. That's why my mom never got anywhere, as she never stood up for her or her own life.

I hate stupid people. I really freaking hate them.

Findingreason, I am having a hard time figuring out what exactly the problem is.

Your friend told her friends you were coming? Did she out you, or what's the issue here? Sweety I would love introductions around my school, as it is people just look at that weird gir...wait, what?...walking to and from the parking lot twice a day. Are these people going to hold you down and stuff booze in your belly and drugs up your nose? You don't have to be a troll to be serious about your grades, a C is a degree. Being a loner isn't as fun as it looks and I'm at a loss for a reason why you would do this to yourself.

Honey your mother is not a bitch and I doubt she is insane. You might be mad at her, though again I can't clearly see why, but from what I've seen she has been doing her best to deal with your situation. She is just a human much like yourself, and having a transexual child with issues isn't the easiest thing to deal with. Try to give her a break. About her temper comment, I can feel your frustration and anger dripping off the page. If I can feel it a day later and god knows how many thousand miles away, lordy-lou I wouldn't want to be close...and this is coming from someone who is on your side. Is that really the kind of person you want to be?

Its easy to avoid the party crowd in college.  First, lots of them are not there for long.  Second, you never find them at the library.  Though, oddly enough, at the library at grad school we did have a cocktail hour every day in our offices.

QuoteYour friend told her friends you were coming? Did she out you, or what's the issue here? Sweety I would love introductions around my school, as it is people just look at that weird gir...wait, what?...walking to and from the parking lot twice a day. Are these people going to hold you down and stuff booze in your belly and drugs up your nose? You don't have to be a troll to be serious about your grades, a C is a degree. Being a loner isn't as fun as it looks and I'm at a loss for a reason why you would do this to yourself.

I don't believe she outed me, and from what I understand now she was playing a nasty joke on me the other night. Said she did know people there, but she'd need me there to get involved mostly. I do know that being a loner isn't really fun , as I have been somewhat that way my whole life. I would prefer hanging out with people that don't party all the time, and care about school too.

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Honey your mother is not a bitch and I doubt she is insane. You might be mad at her, though again I can't clearly see why, but from what I've seen she has been doing her best to deal with your situation. She is just a human much like yourself, and having a transexual child with issues isn't the easiest thing to deal with. Try to give her a break. About her temper comment, I can feel your frustration and anger dripping off the page. If I can feel it a day later and god knows how many thousand miles away, lordy-lou I wouldn't want to be close...and this is coming from someone who is on your side. Is that really the kind of person you want to be?

We have come a long way with things, and I probably did not mention everything in my last post. Being under a huge amount of pressure has made me very touchy lately as far as temper goes, and she managed to push the sensitive buttons.

Normally I am very calm on the exterior and most of the people that know me know it takes a lot to make me mad. But unfortunately I do have a lot of anger built underneath that gets suppressed and kept under. And in a still hard time to determine my gender, it is rough to deal with life in general. The girl has played the disappearing game on me for a while now, and she is the calm side of me, the one that brings the positive light to me. But I don't know if I am comfortable with transition or not, but yet being in girl's clothing/estrogen take down my temper and on-the-edge personality

And just living with my parents again has it's pressure on me too.